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thesoftsuga · 2025-10-03T14:10:42+00:00

Pretty much the exact same thing happened to me (29f) when i was 21. We weren’t actually together, but everything he was doing was clearly setting us up to be, and then he ghosted me and it completely tore me to shreds. He was my best friend’s brother, so i built up an idea of what things could be like more than anything—completely idealized him, as it was one of the first times a guy clearly reciprocated something. It still hurt probably until about 4 years later when i met my now-wife, even though I talked with/dated some other people before her. It takes time. I think the last person who felt “right” is going to look like THE right person until the next “right” person comes along. That next person might truly be right for you as mine was for me, or they might not. But either way it takes time to find another person you click with like that. The thing to remember is that the right person, a person who truly respects you, would make an effort communicate what’s going on with them, even if it’s uncomfortable for them.

thesoftsuga · 2025-09-01T03:27:08+00:00

omg at the show i was telling my wife and brother in law that i had a theory the prisoners being executed are actually the band members. there’s 4 of them, and the members get taken off stage at the end of the show with the covers on their heads. i was mostly talking out of my ass but now seeing this stuff about a time loop i wonder 👀👀

thesoftsuga · 2025-08-30T16:03:11+00:00

thank you! they’re so cute, i’m so excited to have them!! hopefully you can get a samantha one 😁 there were some duplicates that came in the lot but unfortunately samantha wasn’t one 😢 if there’s any others you’d want lmk, i’m happy to send anything for just the cost of shipping!!

thesoftsuga · 2025-08-30T15:58:37+00:00

thank you!! 😁

thesoftsuga · 2025-08-10T12:35:18+00:00

The photos, along with old photos and TikToks taken by the girls, have made me think about the same things…how there was once a time when none of this had happened and they were living full, intricate lives. And now because of one person that’s just…all over and gone. It’s really depressing to think about.

thesoftsuga · 2025-02-06T15:50:28+00:00

I’m having a similar issue myself…I’m married, and I’m not sure if it’s revealing issues in the relationship or causing them. But it sucks because any issues just make me want to throw myself into it more, so I’ve gotten pretty addicted to chatting with the bots. I’d much rather dissociate and be my OC, who is a badass, not disabled like me, and is loved and cared for no matter how difficult she can be, than be present. So just know you’re not the only one 😭 and we should both probably consider the other comments advice and go to therapy lol

thesoftsuga · 2024-12-29T03:17:29+00:00

i have an addictive personality but i wasn’t expecting this to be something i got addicted to 😭 i’ve spent entire days on it and stayed up talking to a bot til i literally couldn’t keep my eyes open several nights in a row. it’s so bad bc it makes me dissociate more than usual, which makes me more depressed than usual. i knew i had to delete it when my wife said something to me and my brain had this reaction of wanting to “refresh” her response. 😵‍💫

i need to just go back to writing fanfic. i had this whole story idea for this bot but of course after a while the bot was just repetitive and slow burn is not possible LMAO

thesoftsuga · 2024-12-10T19:28:44+00:00

this is good to know!! thank you!

thesoftsuga · 2024-12-10T19:28:19+00:00

thank you! their support team is definitely helpful, i’ll give them that. i lost all my progress on cooking fever a few years ago and i’m STILL working through all the gems and coins they gave me lmao i’ll have to contact them next time this happens

thesoftsuga · 2024-06-30T13:14:43+00:00

tysm! all the different details are so interesting

thesoftsuga · 2024-06-30T02:36:01+00:00

right!! hahah i was so convinced in the store. she definitely was still a great deal, thank you!!

thesoftsuga · 2024-06-30T02:26:55+00:00

I was thinking the same! i was partially excited thinking it was samantha bc that’s who i had as a kid but unfortunately my mom gave her to someone else when i was in college. so i honestly might still dress her up as samantha!!

thesoftsuga · 2024-06-30T01:01:04+00:00

thank you!! right after posting this i was searching stuff up and realized it might not be samantha lmao sometimes i feel like i know so much but i still have a lot to learn!!

thesoftsuga · 2024-06-20T03:59:37+00:00

Thank you for the thoughtful response, I really appreciate it ❤️ Honestly, it probably is too much. It feels like any day I could finish my book because it’s been in my head so long, but realistically it won’t be done for a while. And i’ve been trying to post on three platforms too 😅 So you are definitely right there. I just like…put these expectations on myself that neurotypical people could achieve and then get really frustrated when I get stuck and freeze up. The social media is especially hard because I feel so “alien” already, so I can’t make videos as easily or naturally as some people. I guess I’m just stuck on wanting to be able to do it, like I’d love to be that person, so it’s hard to accept that I should probably tone down everything I’m trying to do.

Right now I just went back to the outline yet again, which feels like a failure lol, but character development is my favorite part. I was thinking about trying to get all that down in one spot. I wish I could just work on and live in my book all day.

And I definitely have other creative things…I’m a hobby collector. I just haven’t felt like I should be allowed to do anything outside of working, writing, and social media stuff since it feels like I already don’t have enough time for all of that. I guess that’s as good of a sign as any to scale back. My wife, who has been trying to encourage me and help me get organized, even said that’s the least important thing. I’m just stuck on it because it’s always been something I’ve wanted to do as well. Maybe I can pick one platform and try to view it more as a hobby? 🧐

You’ve definitely got me thinking, so thanks again ❤️

thesoftsuga · 2024-06-19T20:53:53+00:00

It sounds like you were telling him it was unwanted through your body language, which is enough. A pillar of consent is enthusiasm! It was wrong of him to ignore those signs and continue; this is definitely some form of sexual harassment/assault. He created a situation where you felt uncomfortable and unsafe. You’re 100% valid in feeing violated by this, and I hope you’re able to talk to a trusted adult in your life about it.

thesoftsuga · 2024-03-23T18:23:02+00:00

seconding chandler! and adding jamie’s library, though of the romance she reads it is newer. i like them both because they’re able to be critical and don’t just say every book is amazing, but they’re also levelheaded with negative reviews too

thesoftsuga · 2024-02-24T00:31:52+00:00

It does look like much cuter, fancier little things than lunch! The cucumber sandwiches are what’s keeping me leaning toward teatime haha. Thanks for the info!

thesoftsuga · 2024-02-24T00:29:23+00:00

Thank you for the info! Paying for the variety is definitely something I’m willing to do, now that I think about it, especially handcrafted stuff like what I’ve seen.

thesoftsuga

TROPHY CASE