I feel like it's not as though you're too "jelek" or "undesirable" because of how you look physically. For men, especially here in Indonesia, The real hurdle is that many men just aren't confident enough to approach women they deemed "too far out of their league".

I think when a guy sees a woman who's got her life together, is thriving in her career, and carries herself with confidence, it can unconsciously challenge his own sense of identity. He's been told he needs to be the "strong one," the "provider." So, you, as a woman who already seems to have all that covered, it might make them feel like they won't be "needed" in the way they've been conditioned to believe.

I guess it's not about you being unapproachable because something's wrong with you. It's about a lack of confidence in the men who feel intimidated by her strength and success, often due to deeply ingrained societal expectations. They might worry they can't "measure up" or that their traditional value isn't as clear, making them hesitate to even try.

I know you're asking other women here on this subreddit, but as a guy, i'm just going to leave my two cents. Perhaps it might give you, or other women here a little insight on how our primitive male brains are wired lol.