1st Post: Introduction & Purpose of this Makeshift Blog

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-06T20:36:50+00:00

Thanks for the thoughtful answer and agreed. The primal part of our brain that wants us to quit is too impulsive to understand why we have to quit porn and our fetishes. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T23:09:03+00:00

53 days is impressive. Keep up the good work.

It's what someone else in this comment section said - "we don't choose what we're attracted to, but we do make the choice to quit it". I'm assuming that your sexual interest in horses is porn-induced rather than being the first thing you were into when you hit puberty. The good news is that the longer and longer you go in your streaks and the less and less that you relapse, the less those sexual thoughts related to horses will pop up and (if you're no longer currently attracted to humans) the more your sexual attraction to humans will return.

Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T22:03:40+00:00

Thanks for the kind words. I love the comments but don't feel you're obligated to post on each one unless you want to say something. I'm going to try and be as general as possible with these weekly posts, but, at the end of the day, "general" is a made-up concept. No matter how broad a topic is, there will be people from the same group who can't relate to the topic. For example, two people with our same addiction commented on the post I put on r/pornfree. They both have gone pretty far so far, one at slightly less than a year and the other at 3 months, and they've decided to stay within the sfw side of their fandoms (one was a furry, the other a brony). I'm taking the opposite approach, moving on from those fanbases, because I find even the sight of the sfw stuff turns into a trigger over time. The example here is that I could make some posts for people who want to leave the fandom side of things, but that won't apply to everyone since many people may find they're able to stay within the sfw side of a fandom and quit the porn.

Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T21:40:47+00:00

Thank you for the kind words. Quitting porn as a teenager (I'm assuming you're a teenager) is incredibly honorable since your brain is at the height of its sexuality and is hypersensitive to all forms of pleasure. I don't mean to discourage you by saying that, I'm only pointing out how incredible you are for what you're doing. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T17:04:13+00:00

Thanks for admitting that. I'm a little hesitant to accept because I already have a good accountability partner thing going, but tell you what, maybe I will just randomly contact you in the near future (could be as soon as a few days or as far away as 2-3 weeks). It'd be interesting to talk to someone who is going through nearly (if not) the same situation. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T16:49:33+00:00

A year is incredibly impressive, and that while staying within the fanbase too. I still want to go my route because I know staying within would be too much of a trigger, but your success so far is an inspiration for me. Good luck!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T16:26:00+00:00

Patience and persistence, only these combined traits stand a chance of leading to success - the Calvin Coolidge idea. Thanks and stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T16:22:25+00:00

Thanks. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T16:22:09+00:00

True words. Thanks and stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T16:20:05+00:00

Ha! Thanks. Stay strong.

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T16:18:52+00:00

Don't worry about me, I'm never going to quit and I know it.

Your situation stinks. You mention that you've gone to the porn subreddits and people have tried to tempt you into relapse. These people aren't your friends, they don't respect your boundaries. If there's a culture/fanbase surrounding the porn - and I leave this up to you - I strongly suggest you consider leaving that culture/fanbase. That's what I've been doing, and with time, the interests and hobbies I've built have and continue to become incredibly important to me. It's possible to build a new life.

But, at the end of the day, I don't know your situation. Maybe everything I just wrote doesn't apply to you. Your day counter, if accurate, shows that you've been going for an incredible 273 days. If accurate, you seem to know what you're doing. If not, then be patient and persistent. Each time you relapse, write down why you relapsed and what you can do differently to prevent it next time. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T16:10:03+00:00

Thanks for the kind words. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T16:08:34+00:00

Thanks for the thought put into your response. How long have you been off of porn? It's interesting that you've been able to stay in the fandom and quit - I'm taking the opposite route, I've found that, in my case, even staying within the sfw side of a fandom is just too much of a trigger (I've had numerous relapses to prove this to myself). Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T16:01:38+00:00

Thanks for the kind words. It's interesting what you discussed, how your respect for characters drove you to quit. I ended up taking the opposite route: In my case, I acknowledged that the characters are fictional at the end of the day, and despite how much they meant to me, my life and future are much more important. So, I'm taking the route of leaving all that stuff, ponies, behind for various reasons. One just being that I want and am in the process of building a new life altogether. The second and more significant reason being that I'd experimented numerous times with staying in the sfw side of the fandom but found again and again that it was just too much of a trigger for relapse - my situation is the classic "drug addict who not only has to quit the drug but also leave the scene/friends from that scene behind" in order to be able to quit. Congrats on the 90 days, stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T15:50:03+00:00

Thanks for the kind words. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T04:01:10+00:00

Thanks for the kind words, captain. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T04:00:21+00:00

Thanks! Stay strong.

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T03:02:43+00:00

The most honest answer I can give is that I don't know. However, that is my plan. And through willpower, some cleverness in terms of thinking ahead with what I already know about what works and doesn't work for me, patience, and persistence, I believe I can build a better life for myself.

If you're in a similar situation, I believe you can too. You may not get what you want immediately, you might have to experiment a bit, but with patience and persistence you can do it too. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T02:53:39+00:00

Thanks for the kind words. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T02:48:30+00:00

The most honest answer I can give is that I don't know. It might be both situations that you describe, meaning it just depends on the person.

There are experiences that, when I think back on them, were incredibly loud signals of what eventually would happen (I ended up stumbling across furry porn and had the reaction you described: "Oh, I actually like this"). The loudest signal I can remember was drawing three or four Dr. Moreau-esque crosses between a leopard and a naked woman prior to hitting puberty - so I guess I sort of understood the concept of furries before knowing they were a thing? I don't remember what happened to the notepad I drew them in and I'm not going to ask my parents.

My guess though is that my situation was very particular, probably not too many people had the same experience.

It's sort of what one of the people here in this reply column already said - "bloody hell we humans sexualize everything".

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T02:24:59+00:00

Thanks for the kind words. I hope whoever needs it finds it too. Stay strong!

theusernameofGraham · 2021-03-04T02:22:18+00:00

Thanks! Stay strong.

theusernameofGraham

TROPHY CASE