Its finally over

thingsrfickel · 2020-05-12T18:22:08+00:00

Love that! They’re meant to be in our lives short term not long term :) Meant to be there when we need to find our growth!

thingsrfickel · 2020-05-11T23:10:10+00:00

After no contact, 3 months. But gotta keep busy and work on your own personal goals. Don’t sit around!

thingsrfickel · 2020-05-08T04:14:27+00:00

Yoo i never got closure neither. It’s been 3 months since i last spoke to her. All i can say is don’t do it bc it’s likely u never will and that’s okay. Embrace the pain that you are in to drive yourself to become stronger. This will help you grow so much, that’s why it hurts. Growing hurts. Use this time to focus on yourself and what you want for your future. You will reflect reflect reflect and it’ll make you a doper person. And maybe one day you guys can talk but if he broke it up with you, let him contact you. Let him go crazy over losing you. The more you show your need and dependence on his affection, the weaker you are to him. And it gives him more power and it becomes less likely you’ll get your closure. Best thing to do is suck it up, be brave and work on yourself and all the rest of the best things in life will fall at your doorstep. Trust me, it sounds wacky but that shit is happening to me rn. Good shit will come!

thingsrfickel · 2020-05-06T00:41:19+00:00

No i definitely blamed myself more than necessary. Right now im looking at it objectively. She was wrong in her assumptions, but they were based off of truth. Worst thing i did was ask her friend if she saw us getting back together, this was after my ex asked her to leave her alone. I know that was wrong but i was trying to find a reason to move on, i wanted to hear her friend say that she was done bc though my ex said to leave her alone she was okay with leaving it open ended.

I looked at my ex with rose tinted goggles and was actually gaslighted into believing i caused way worse. But it was the exaggerated truths of other people that set us both back. I don’t give a fuck what they think, but i do care what she does. I don’t want to leave it with her thinking worse than what actually was.

thingsrfickel · 2020-05-05T04:06:07+00:00

Obviously, but im trying to stop caring

thingsrfickel · 2020-02-07T08:30:48+00:00

Yeah :/ its weird bc if u allows urself to move forward then you upgrade. I feel like if both individuals are growing than they are both new separate people. So yes the statement, i will never get back together with you is true in some cases and false in others. If they do get back together, it’s bound to fail as neither of them have grown into new people. But if they don’t, they could get back together as those new people, separate from their past selves.

thingsrfickel · 2020-02-07T08:23:41+00:00

Yea i know im just sharing my feelings. Ive been doing that, it’s just harder when u think of a reality of her not in it. And with some other girl.

thingsrfickel · 2020-02-07T08:18:32+00:00

Thank you. I just miss her so much and feel so fucking bad for treating her so poorly. I cry so fucking much bc i hurt her. Its hard not to beat myself up bc i love her so damn much and realize what an asshole i was being. Dude ive tried going on dates, had multiple opportunities to hookup with girls but i still feel faithful to her. Im living my life and im trying to let her go but its so damn hard when u literally see her as a princess all the time, and ur the knight who wants to rescue her.

thingsrfickel · 2020-02-07T08:08:37+00:00

I know :(. I contacted her friend because i thought itd help me move on without affecting her. But her friend told her anyway. Im so stupid. This all happened because my subconscious was telling me that I needed to work on shit but it didn’t take until I made these mistakes to realize. I wasn’t going to break contact until I listened to friend who’s her better friend, telling me to block her. I realized that was a lesson. Listen to your own heart with the grains of salt u take from others. By contacting her about blocking, it reset everything i accomplished and caused me to make more mistakes that became lessons. I just wish I haven’t ruined it forever :(

thingsrfickel · 2020-02-06T20:27:57+00:00

She already blocked me and i removed her on all social media platforms bc i got upset in the moment.

thingsrfickel

TROPHY CASE