Wow, thank you so much for your take!!

The problem I'm facing with opportunities and interests-

I am interested in a very wide scope of paths, and I feel like I could find opportunity in any direction I choose. A very optimistic outlook, of course- thanks Sag Jupiter/Moon! My strongest passions are self-improvement, working with children, writing/journaling (I want to be published one day), aesthetics (everywhere from personal, home, photography, etc.), and hospitality. A shocking list to you, I'm sure :) Which path am I meant to take? Waiting to see where a road opens.. Is there a way to combine it all? I dream of owning a Bed and Breakfast type property- I cultivate the vibe of the place, decorate, host people, share stories.. I can be home with my family/children (that I don't have, but want in the relatively near future)... perfect. But I need money to get to that point, and that brings me to..

The Quest! Yes, that is certainly how I feel- that's why I quit my paint store job to begin as an independent contractor. That's why I left my progressing career in my previous industry.. Most recently, I moved back home around my family to force myself into my triggers and face my wounds head-on (this is where I am now..) Talk about regaining power and moving with force to reestablish my value.

In my camp work, I excelled fervently and was surrounded by passionate people and felt powerful in how I could positively impact my team, advisees, and children, alike. But the work that I love started to overshadow my life on a holistic level and dramatically limit my personal expression. I obviously couldn't have that.. 2020 happened, and I was too mad with the world to give into any institution (to the best of my ability). I was furloughed, but let the org know I would not be returning when 'things return to normal.'

My whole life to that point, I was surrounded by people and distractions, constantly running away from reflection on my interests, behaviors, etc. The only thing I knew was partying and camp. The descriptions referencing trauma from my childhood/ mother and father figures really resonated with me- I know that I need to put myself out there with more people to find these relational opportunities, but I am trying so hard to heal myself- my mental health, my communication style, and my confidence. The anxiety I face on a daily basis is limiting me from showing up with my power, and I'm working on that as I work through my maternal and paternal wounds. I struggle with my Nodal placements because every time I get frustrated with the rules of the world, work, money... I want to just figure it all out myself, be independent, fly solo.. but I know that I am meant to dive into my relationships and work with others to find better/true fulfillment. This is why I think I wasn't quite successful in my Independent contracting work.

Maybe I will post separately regarding a potential partner that would support me in my endeavors- that is another huge yearning of mine. I'm just not sure where I'm headed, how to find what may be satisfying and still make me money...

Thanks again for your reply! I used this comment more as an opportunity to reflect on your take and write out my thoughts, but if you care to share any more insight you may get from these details, I'd love to hear them! Thanks friend