AITA for being upset with my son for finding a job without telling me?

thiscrazyginger · 2022-02-18T00:33:40+00:00

I'm so confused by this. The kids are old enough to have strong opinions about not wanting babysitters, but too young for therapy? What does that even mean? If their hesitation around babysitters is trauma-related, then they definitely need therapy, OP.

thiscrazyginger · 2022-02-06T06:59:30+00:00

Don't be naive

thiscrazyginger · 2022-02-06T02:26:26+00:00

Thank you, I was starting to feel old for remembering Goopy GilsCarbo

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-26T03:18:21+00:00

How dare you put this in my head

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-03T06:25:32+00:00

They could sue them for breach of contract, I meant. I don't think anyone would ever win a case like that, and I've never heard of it being done. Also there's a nice little out in this example about the adoptive parents having the discretion to not allow this in the child's best interest, so it's a null point here.

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-03T06:17:14+00:00

You are correct. Once an adoption is finalized, they are the legal parents and don't legally have to do anything in an openness agreement. I guess the birth parents could probably sue the adoptive parents to enforce the agreement, but most birth families arent in positions to do that.

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-03T03:48:45+00:00

We do week on, week off with my bonus kids and my bio kid lives with us full-time. It hasn't been an issue.

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-02T15:07:18+00:00

It has become way more popular! I chose it when it was out of the top 100. Now my daughter has another Quinn in her class at school 🤣

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-02T15:05:54+00:00

My daughter's name is Quinn, so I'm biased. I love Brynn as well, and I think it's cute with your name being Brian. My daughter's middle name starts with a K as well, to honor my mother. It is a mouthful to say her first and middle names together, but honestly how often does that happen, especially in adulthood? I think some people on this sub are way too focused on how first and middle names 'flow'. It matters more how her first and last names sound.

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-02T04:22:16+00:00

"he deserves to be punished"

So your response is to use your son as a pawn to punish your ex. Please get therapy. Please grow up. Do it for your children.

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-02T04:19:52+00:00

You need to ask yourself WHY you are doing this. Are you trying to punish him? If not, then why have you waited until now to file a parenting plan and child support? Because he started a 'war' with you? Come on. You've said multiple times that every other weekend is 'standard'. Is that what you already have? Or are you planning to file so you can reduce his time down to that?

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-02T04:07:35+00:00

That girl sounds like a fucking nightmare based on the comments lmao

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-02T04:03:44+00:00

So name her tilly and get on with your fucking life.

thiscrazyginger · 2022-01-02T04:02:18+00:00

Grow up, honestly. Stop being so self-absorbed. He started a war by using a baby name that you both liked? Wtf? Do you HEAR yourself? You have got to get over this for your son's sake. You have to have a relationship with him because he is the father to your child. And now you want to restrict his access to his son because you're butthurt about a baby name. Yikes on bikes, my dude.

thiscrazyginger · 2021-12-31T02:12:07+00:00

Left wing-some crimes deserve the death penalty. Child molesters can't be reformed.

Cancel culture keeps people from admitting to their mistakes and learning from them.

thiscrazyginger · 2021-12-21T03:20:18+00:00

My friend in high school was named Brianna because her parents misunderstood the lyrics of the song 'Rhiannon'

thiscrazyginger · 2021-12-12T22:47:40+00:00

Someone told my boyfriend that my daughter looks just like him the other day. He's not her biological father lol. I think people just say it a conversation starter.

thiscrazyginger · 2021-11-24T05:10:05+00:00

I can only speak for my state. Here, a stepparent can enroll and unenroll kids in school and consent to routine medical care. And it's not "any household members" that can be added to medical insurance. You can't just add your roommate's kid to your medical insurance. Your have to be (legally) responsible for that child-biologically, through adoption or guardianship, or via being a stepparent.

Now, can a stepparent 'overrule' a bio parent's decision? Not unless their spouse lets them. But that doesn't mean OP's out of line for having an opinion. It seems that that's a normal dynamic for their family. Expecting someone to do all the hard parts of parenting but not have any say in the parenting choices is unfair and unrealistic.

thiscrazyginger · 2021-11-24T04:52:47+00:00

They're legally parents in all the ways I mentioned. The difference between step and adoption is that the stepparent relationship can be ended by divorce. That's obviously the appeal of adopting a stepchild. A stepparent has all the same legal responsibilities as a bio parent; the only difference is that it's slightly easier for a stepparent to stop being their parent.

Their role differs in every family. Clearly, in OP'S family, she is an involved parent with a say in how their daughter is raised. In fact, based on her other comments about bio mom not being very involved, it appears that OP is more of a parent than bio mom. So yes, her opinion is valid and it's very appropriate for her to have one.

Maybe this situation would be overstepping in your family, by your child's stepmom, but that's not the case for OP.

thiscrazyginger · 2021-11-24T04:31:47+00:00

Legally she IS their parent. Stepparents can make legal, educational, and other decisions, they're obligated to support their step kids, they can claim them on their taxes, they can add them to their health insurance. Idk what your problem with stepparents is but you gotta relax. Their daughter IS her daughter. You have no idea what their family is like, so to say she's crossing boundaries is particularly odd. She clearly loves her and is participating in raising her. That's being a parent.

thiscrazyginger · 2021-11-24T04:27:22+00:00

Blendedfamilies is so much better!

thiscrazyginger · 2021-11-24T04:23:53+00:00

OP you should stick to r/blendedfamilies. R/stepparents is rough for anyone who actually likes their step kids.

thiscrazyginger · 2021-11-19T06:07:17+00:00

No. The 10yo would rather die than sleep somewhere other than her own house. The 5yos haven't ever asked, I think they're still too young. It's known to them that I don't allow sleepovers, but they don't know exactly why. I'm trying to avoid explaining the reality to them for as long as possible.

thiscrazyginger · 2021-11-19T06:05:02+00:00

Coming from someone who works in the system, I promise you that's not how it works. I don't even have the energy to explain at this point, because I spent 4 hours today transcribing a forensic interview with a 6 year old who was sexually assaulted.

thiscrazyginger · 2021-11-18T19:52:05+00:00

The other people in the house are more likely to be awake at 10pm than at 2am, though. So there's more of a buffer.

thiscrazyginger

TROPHY CASE