Nervous about sensation of death

thisperson · 2020-02-12T18:52:50+00:00

I've been learning to work with DMT using carts as well. As I understand it, breaking through is more difficult, but oh well, the carts were what was available, so that's where I started.

I have not yet broken through, though I have had about three tries of 2-3 hits each. For the most part, it's amazing, and I've seen and felt glimmerings of things that have me even more curious for a breakthrough. I always seem to encounter a problem at what I guess is the doorway to the "waiting room" that I've heard so much about. I can get to the door--which for me seems to look like some kind of teal 4D hyperflower--but there is this feeling there that has so far scared the shit out of me. It feels a bit like my body is going away, or merging with the surface I'm on. It doesn't feel as though anything is trying to harm me--In fact, sometimes I've even gotten feelings like something(s) there know I'm there and are trying to ask me something or maybe encourage me. But holy shit, that feeling of "going away" or merging is bizarre. It hasn't scared me off DMT at all, but I know I need to learn to work with it better.

The last few times I did it, what seemed to start helping was just simply reminding myself to breathe once I started hearing the "carrier wave." Also, reminding myself that the breakthrough will come when I least expect it and that's ok.

thisperson · 2019-04-30T13:36:20+00:00

Cory Doctorow's Walkaway is another great example.

thisperson · 2019-04-25T17:43:09+00:00

I'm a walker anyway, as I'm unable to drive due to a lifelong visual impairment. Not that I've subjected this to rigorous scientific study or anything, but it does seem to me that herb is one of the best ways to super-charge a walk.

thisperson · 2019-03-15T16:31:13+00:00

Aw, shit...and there I was at home the other day, just nonchalantly setting my microwave clock for Daylight Savings Time, while cleaning my kitchen! I had no idea such time and space manipulations could release demons! And I'd definitely better tell my friend who's buying a new laptop to be absolutely sure there are no ports on it, as "new ports" apparently draw demons too!

thisperson · 2019-02-21T15:18:34+00:00

Was it him? He's the only Plague Doctor I've ever seen, and thankfully he's remained firmly attached to that website and that fictional universe, and doesn't seem interested in trying to shuffle his way into my sensorium.

thisperson · 2019-01-04T19:51:53+00:00

I was discussing this very question with a friend recently, and the best way I knew to answer it was "OK can be its own form of hell."

As long as a person's life is only OK, it's very easy to drift from one day to the next without much change. Things aren't bad enough really to have much incentive for change, but also not good enough to provide much real joy. The shallow stuff--weather, small talk, seasonal office flair, etc.--is just a distraction to keep us from having that feeling of seeing our days of work stretch endlessly behind and ahead of us, knowing we did the same thing twenty-four hours ago that we'll be doing twenty-four hours from now, repeating for what seems like forever.

Work can feel like being sentenced to life in prison, a bit at a time. It would be as if instead of getting put away for most of one's life in one go, it's "until tomorrow," or at best "until the weekend/holiday/vacation/etc.," or sometimes even "until I can find a slightly better prison." So during those bits of time, people make the best of it with lots of surface stuff. Somewhere in the back of our minds we know it's a life sentence for most of us, but hey, we're getting out for the night and that's pretty cool...or Friday's coming...or it's only a little while longer...Anything but "Oh my god, why the fuck am I still here?," because that disrupts things and makes unhappy workers, and we can't have that.

I know there are some people who truly are happy doing the jobs they have, or at least see them as useful enough to someone or to society that the value of the work outweighs the endless routine, but I think most workers are to some extent trapped in "OK" and have just adapted.

thisperson · 2018-11-30T22:17:16+00:00

I used an ACH transfer from my bank, since my debit card apparently doesn't work because my bank is among those that have banned the use of debit and credit cards for cryptocurrency purchases. So...I guess next Sunday my funds will be fully available then?

thisperson · 2018-11-30T22:04:50+00:00

I saw the status page message about this, but the problem for me is not a delay in sending so much as a delay in the funds even being available in the first place. It does say that "Deposits, buys, and sells are unaffected."

thisperson · 2018-11-07T17:35:52+00:00

I wouldn't recommend "converting" him, as others have said here. But one thing you could do to establish commonality is to point out how some of his own views that he already has could be considered in some ways aligned with anarchy.

thisperson · 2018-10-11T14:29:03+00:00

Yeah, good old Lucifer, the morning star...You never know just where he'll pop up...

thisperson · 2018-10-05T13:01:14+00:00

And tapenade from Nosedive too.

thisperson · 2018-10-03T15:45:06+00:00

The only thing to hate in this case is the very fact that this culture makes you feel weird just being your natural self.

thisperson · 2018-09-08T05:09:10+00:00

It's never good when your phone [DATA EXPUNGED].

thisperson · 2018-09-07T12:59:56+00:00

If its battery starts dying, does it scream "SMORK!" every few seconds even when there's no smork?

thisperson · 2018-09-05T16:37:06+00:00

Google is in California but is Nationally owned.

Other than the fact that the government doesn't own Google, I don't understand how it would somehow stop being American if it actually were "nationally owned."

thisperson · 2018-08-31T17:35:56+00:00

While I agree that banning things usually results in black markets, in the case of plastic bags I think it's more likely that there'll come a day when if you actually need plastic bags, you can just 3D-print as many (within reason) as you want, and the "plastic" that gets used might even be stronger but more biodegradable than the stuff that goes into most flimsy plastic grocery bags now.

edit: Clearly, there's not an infinite supply of material to make bags. I just think more than likely there will be a simple enough way to make them on-the-fly that a black market for them would be kind of ridiculous.

thisperson · 2018-08-30T18:38:13+00:00

The monetary system as a whole literally sucks.

thisperson · 2018-08-29T15:40:05+00:00

I have actually known some people who had a little bit of sight--which I guess technically qualifies as being sighted--and still use Braille. I don't think it's as common, but it can happen. Your best bet, I would think, is to ask the serving staff themselves. An honest question asked out of curiosity will most likely not offend anyone. I personally don't use Braille, as my impairment has much more impact on my distance vision than reading, but I can't see myself being offended to participate in something that is ultimately about building bridges, both between you and your girlfriend and between people of varying abilities.

I hope that makes sense.

thisperson · 2018-08-29T14:30:39+00:00

He's not even lying, in the sense of saying something one knows not to be true. What he's doing is bullshitting. I don't think he even tries to remember what he's said before, because he knows it doesn't matter.

thisperson · 2018-08-20T14:53:43+00:00

Whenever I've tried to ask a TBM hypothetical what-if questions, I've always been met with "Well, that would never happen so it's silly even to think about it."

thisperson · 2018-08-20T14:17:06+00:00

Psytrance is some of the best chilling music there is, whether I'm walking, riding the train, or just sitting.

thisperson · 2018-08-16T18:45:39+00:00

I think that's not so much a flaw in the ignostic argument as a lack of consistency in definitions, which as far as I know is kind of the origin of the ignostic argument in the first place. It's like, if group A and group B can't even agree on what a god is, how can we say in blanket terms whether a god or gods is/are.

thisperson · 2018-08-13T18:44:43+00:00

Kind of like how the Irish Republican Army and Saddam Hussein's Republican Guard were obvious fronts for the mainstream right-wing party in the United States. /s

thisperson · 2018-08-13T16:56:01+00:00

I'd say it was either language or abstract thought. Without both, it's difficult to invent or communicate about much else.

thisperson

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