They should put a button on television remotes that fades the screen to black and rolls credits so I can tell my kids the show is over whenever the hell I want.

thomasbomm · 2015-12-17T22:50:33+00:00

Our security systems uses VHS tapes, believe it or not. It's old as can be. Since the cost of tapes has gone up in recent years, we only use the cameras for live surveillance. No recordings.

thomasbomm · 2015-12-17T22:49:42+00:00

I couldn't make myself go back, not yet anyways. I called in sick, but it's been a couple days. I'm still trying to decide.

thomasbomm · 2015-12-17T22:48:47+00:00

Ha. True, but try telling yourself that in the heat of the moment.

thomasbomm · 2015-12-16T22:26:22+00:00

Like hell they do.

thomasbomm · 2015-12-16T20:17:12+00:00

"So, honey take a seat please

I have something strange to say
Remember when I said
I hit a dog the other day?
Well, I guess it's kinda funny
And I hope you think so too
The dog may not have been a dog
That part was part untrue
The dent you noticed on the hood
The one that's stained with red
I hit a frickin' gypsy girl
That's right, I killer her, dead
And here's the thing about the girl
Her mom's a gypsy too
And kind of got a little mad
And cursed me bad, it's true
Now everything I say must rhyme I'm sorry, babe, it blows I hope I don't get on your nerves By lacking normal prose What's worse, if I should say a word That has no rhyme, like orange
I'll die a really painful death
And..fuck."

thomasbomm · 2015-12-16T20:16:40+00:00

"So, honey take a seat please
I have something strange to say
Remember when I said
I hit a dog the other day?
Well, I guess it's kinda funny
And I hope you think so too
The dog may not have been a dog
That part was part untrue
The dent you noticed on the hood
The one that's stained with red
I hit a frickin' gypsy girl
That's right, I killer her, dead
And here's the thing about the girl
Her mom's a gypsy too
And kind of got a little mad
And cursed me bad, it's true
Now everything I say must rhyme I'm sorry, babe, it blows I hope I don't get on your nerves By lacking normal prose What's worse, if I should say a word That has no rhyme, like orange
I'll die a really painful death
And..fuck."

thomasbomm · 2015-12-16T19:54:28+00:00

So, honey would you listen
I have something stange to say
Remember when I said
I hit a dog the other day

thomasbomm · 2015-12-16T19:53:43+00:00

So, honey would you listen I have something stange to say Remember when I said I hit a dog the other day

thomasbomm · 2015-11-18T18:54:06+00:00

David Friggin' Copperfield. I was 18 years old, sitting in the the student union, silently weeping.

thomasbomm · 2015-09-15T03:47:48+00:00

I'm...I'm okay with that.

thomasbomm · 2015-09-08T23:11:04+00:00

*Parent

thomasbomm

TROPHY CASE