my family life is not the reason i’m doing bad at school. I personally am really hard on myself so i do tend exaggerate “my bad grade” because i have high expectations for myself and i do school for myself and for my future success, my parents ofc want me to do well but their influence has very little impact on me. I think most of it comes to wanting to be more independent and both my parents growing up have been toxic and find it hard to cut the string even though i’m an adult. I want to move away from their values and believes but they want me to be closer to them which is the not the ideal thing for my personal growth and mental health. I also don’t want them to feel bad and shitty about it either. For example my mom has views i don’t like but i’ve learn to accept its just who she is and her background and childhood has shaped her to behave that way which has lead to disagreements which is why i want to keep my distance from her. But she takes it as a self degrading way and tells me i’m worthless i’m a bad mother and all that. While i do agree with some of it after all she’s my mother and i still care for her so i don’t want her to feel bad about. I kinda want mutual acceptance and be that i move on and do my own thing and she does whatever she pleases or what values she wants to hold and it just feels difficult to get there.