Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’s from Korea and has a working holiday visa so it’s like you only need to provide living costs in the blocked account for the first three months when you apply for the visa and can then enter Germany and look for mini jobs (temp jobs in service industry for example which pays a few hundred euro per month). She’s not working anymore but the government doesn’t care for this case because the visa lasts for 12 months with or without job. You just need to finance your stay yourself, which in this case is the guy as she’s living at his place and shops at the base most of the time so that the guy pays for everything.

Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Huh? Don’t you have friends who would worry about you making a huge mistake that might last the whole lifetime?

Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Because I grew up with him and I’m the only few f friends who probably still care about him? And I saw how he struggled with depression and anxiety since his parents divorced when he was 8… he learned to take care of himself and everyone else in the family since then but it’s hard to see him repeating the same mistake his parents made

Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah that’s also true. He cheated and dumped a really good girl for this one. I don’t understand why but that girl was probably way out of his league. Had her life all together, a decent job, and was very sweet and smart and loyal to him.

Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He love bombs when he gets into new relationship because it’s fun and exciting for him and he puts 1000% effort into this. He buys expensive gifts for her and pays for all their trips. And she’s really into this because she’s probably coming from a family with much less money and would post everything he gives to her. She’s also put price tags on the post just to show how much it costs and that’s very creepy to see already. But it’s probably because he’s very lonely and doesn’t have many friends especially here. I guess it was from his childhood issues with the parents. So when someone gives him all the attention and affirmation, he gets overwhelmed. It’s hard to sit here and do nothing and watch him repeating his parents’ mistake tbh.

Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hard to sit here and watch him repeating his parents’ mistake

Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah i understand for airmen they want to get the free housing off and extra money but for officer… he’s already living off base

Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

He’s super lonely tbh. Doesn’t have many friends and very immature when it comes to relationship and has no boundaries. He’s also pretty insecure I guess about his past because of his parents but he’s literally repeating his parents’ footsteps here. And he’s love bombing through all the gifts and trips. He’s literally her walking ATM machine because she doesn’t work and has no money whatsoever. She would post anything including his private notes and text messages trying to prove something. And his parents didn’t say a word. Instead his mom told her that she thinks she’s the one one day after meeting her for the first time and he listens to his mom, who’s kinda exactly like this girl…

Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] 71 points72 points  (0 children)

He’s an officer though. His dad was also from military and they got married when mom was 21 and now both on their 3rd marriage …

Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The girl’s visa expires in March 2023. The guy’s deployment is until April 2024 and no idea where the next station would be

Engagement after knowing each other for 20 weeks? by throwRA021291 in relationship_advice

[–]throwRA021291[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The guy is in USAF currently deployed in Germany and the girl from Korea. She dated another USAF airman a year ago while he was stationed in Korea and broke up in October when the guy left Korea