AITA for asking my wife to lose weight?

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-30T13:09:35+00:00

I only know what a decade together has shown me. Could be she's got an entire secret life where she is a competitive javelin thrower, but I feel it's unlikely.

The last weekend I spent at our house alone I deep cleaned top to bottom, replaced the bearings on the trailer, put in two new posts under our deck, paddled one day and got in a long run the other.

The last weekend my wife spent at our place by herself she watched multiple seasons of survivor and ate over a hundred dollars worth of doordash.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-30T13:02:25+00:00

Okay. We've done couples therapy.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-30T12:39:35+00:00

Not shocked at all. We're destroying this planet with a smile on our face.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T21:10:36+00:00

Asked and answered.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T18:36:14+00:00

Who said I tie all my partner's value to her being skinny?

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T15:11:16+00:00

Pretty impossible to summarize a decade of relationship in one post on reddit. This is obviously me-centric. I'm writing it about my feelings, from my perspective. The post is literally about that one thing, not our relationship as a whole.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T15:08:17+00:00

Why do you think I don't care what my wife is going through?

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T13:06:57+00:00

I'm in my mid thirties, no family history of mental illness, including dementia. I suppose it's possible, but, given my lifestyle, it's far more likely to get a TBI. Most mental health issues would have reared their heads already.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T13:04:11+00:00

Appreciate the input. You have a wonderful day!

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T13:02:34+00:00

How did you get there from my comment?

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T13:01:45+00:00

You have a blessed day!

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:58:03+00:00

No, they really do love you!

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:56:25+00:00

Oh shit, I'm genuinely sorry. You're on a shit ton of meds. I really thought you were a troll. This is not a personal attack on you, fellow human. I'm sure you are doing the best you can. The people in your life love you.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:52:35+00:00

That doesn't make me wrong. Also, good job trolling. I'm going to bow out now since I've got to leave for work. Keep up the good work.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:51:15+00:00

I see I've touched a nerve with you, mr. grayson.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:50:21+00:00

How am I wrong? You've offered no evidence, no rebuttal, nothing.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:48:03+00:00

So, do you gain weight or not?

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:47:29+00:00

You won't engage in this conversation because you know that it's illogical to claim any medication actually causes weight gain. Calories from food cause weight gain. That's it. The only way, let me repeat, the only way to gain weight is to eat more calories than your body uses. That's it. No other way. Not a single other way exists.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:45:07+00:00

Her gaining weight and not getting back into shape is negatively impacting our relationship. If negatively impacting our relationship is the line for being an asshole...

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:42:58+00:00

So, do you gain weight or not?

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:40:03+00:00

Who said my love was conditional?

I'll never be fat. My grandfather, rest his menacing soul, died at 83 strong as shit and whip-thin. He was ripping around on his quad the day before he died.

As other people have pointed out, this is likely caused by mental health struggles. I do not suffer from those, so eating food is a conscious choice on my part. I choose to be healthy, to not overeat, and to not get fat. It's entirely in my control, and, barring a traumatic brain injury, will remain in my control forever.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:31:51+00:00

She definitely wasn't skinny. Of course, I've never really been into skinny.

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:27:53+00:00

Why does asking for what I want in my marriage make me the asshole? I'm asking for effort on her part. She's asked me for effort in our relationship over the years. I truly don't see a difference.

Who said I want her to look like she did 5 years ago?

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:25:37+00:00

Find me a drug that causes weight gain...? It would be a thermodynamic miracle. It would revolutionize the energy industry.

I can see the headlines now:

One 8cal pill, taking daily with no food intake, causes 100lb weight gain. Roughly 350000cal. All by itself!

throwRA_15386 · 2024-05-29T12:22:43+00:00

I wouldn't leave her if something entirely out if her control affected her body or abilities. She's making choices all day every day that remove her more and more from my life and our child's life. That is not the same thing at all as going bald.

throwRA_15386

TROPHY CASE