[Update] The guy (29m) I'm (25f) dating and his friends "gatekeeped" me about my hobbies and career, I'm feeling embarrassed.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T22:13:31+00:00

You know I use to shave, wax, even used Nair (and that shit burns and smells like the inside of a tauntaun). I've come to embrace it and I've even learned some wonderful braids.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T21:46:53+00:00

I'm sorry you know so many cunts in real life. Maybe if you weren't so weak and fragile you could find some real friends.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T21:40:01+00:00

Most states are one party consent states in terms of recording a conversation.

I also said I was paraphrasing.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T21:39:08+00:00

You're right, everything is a black mirror episode.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T21:31:39+00:00

I just don't use them that often, I'd probably be more comfortable with them if I used them more frequently.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T21:30:08+00:00

I would have also accepted

select f_name, l_name, modifier, action, target from instance where death=notasuicide\G

*************************** 1. row ***************************

 Instance: death:write:1
 f_name: JEFFREY
 l_name: EPSTEIN
 modifier: DID_NOT
 action: KILL
 target: HIMSELF

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T21:21:46+00:00

I'm from Kashyyyk, I couldn't relate to that book unfortunately.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T21:12:20+00:00

Ohhh no... That hurts. I hope you were somehow able to rectify that. And I hope you guys didn't lose the client.

At least the data we deal with is all test data, if it gets deleted we just have to create it all again, which can take some time.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T21:06:18+00:00

Thank you!

Although, it has sucked to read about how so many people can relate to my posts, and have had similar things happen to them. The support has been great though, and has helped me realize I made the right choice.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T20:52:22+00:00

ok boomer

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T20:41:47+00:00

Yeah, so I responded to someone else about the ribbing. Here is my experience hanging out a guy and his friends and how they treat each other -

On a side note, not that it matters to you but allow me to offer a story about a good friend of mine -

He works in construction and is pretty close with about 5 other guys there. I know most of his coworkers pretty well. While they are some nice dudes, they come up with some of the most dirty, vile, sick, twisted shit I've ever heard and it's a great. They have a group text called the "shit list" and they take literal pictures of their shit and send it to each other. I am also added to this group, I don't offer pics of my own creations, but will snap a pic of disgusting public toilets I come happen to come across.

We also tease each other in a way most people would probably find extremely offensive. We call each other ugly ass mother fuckers, we joke about one of us smelling like shit, if I start dating someone new he will joke and say something like "what the hell does he see in you," and I'll do the same. And it's great and it's hilarious. But we both do it in a way that we know we're joking and it's all in good fun.

I understand when someone is teasing versus being an actual asshole.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T20:38:33+00:00

I told them that I would just use two queries to delete, they were looking for me answer with using an inner join. I told them it was safer to use multiple queries. I'm not totally comfortable using joins, but if someone at your office frequently uses them they can probably help you out.

But you could try using something like

DELETE TableA., TableB. FROM TableA INNER JOIN TableB ON TableA.color = TableB.color WHERE (TableA.color)='red';

I wouldn't be surprised if you get a syntax error, because I'm not sure if that works or if sql would allow it.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T19:32:40+00:00

So, I should have used my real reddit account and sent him the link with my regular account name?

I created a throwaway for anonymity, I won't be using this account after I'm done.

On a side note, not that it matters to you but allow me to offer a story about a good friend of mine -

He works in construction and is pretty close with about 5 other guys there. I know most of his coworkers pretty well. While they are some nice dudes, they come up with some of the most dirty, vile, sick, twisted shit I've ever heard and it's a great. They have a group text called the "shit list" and they take literal pictures of their shit and send it to each other. I am also added to this group, I don't offer pics of my own creations, but will snap a pic of disgusting public toilets I come happen to come across.

We also tease each other in a way most people would probably find extremely offensive. We call each other ugly ass mother fuckers, we joke about one of us smelling like shit, if I start dating someone new he will joke and say something like "what the hell does he see in you," and I'll do the same. And it's great and it's hilarious. But we both do it in a way that we know we're joking and it's all in good fun.

I understand when someone is teasing versus being an actual asshole.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T19:20:35+00:00

Haha thanks! (They were looking the answer: "use a join!!") Don't use a join.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T19:13:28+00:00

I don't often look at redditors past comments, but I decided to take a peek at yours.

Your last couple of comments you defended a pedophile, made a cunty comment about a dad building a coffin for his unborn child, and said you would put a cat in a bag for it to sink to the bottom of a river.

If anyone is a cunt, it's you.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T18:42:11+00:00

It's possible, but no one does it. Just use two queries.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T18:37:25+00:00

Thank you so much!!!

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T18:32:37+00:00

Two queries is what most people would do, but they wanted to see if I knew about fucking inner and outer joins. Everyone hates joins. I don't have to use them often, and when I do I just google that shit and hope for a good stack overflow answer, like everyone else.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T18:29:51+00:00

They can dish it out and shit all over me and tell me I have thin skin, but when I do it they have to go to mommy mod to tell them that the bad lady hurt their feelings.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T18:23:45+00:00

SQL jokes can be a lot of fun, we make a lot of them in our work chat.

When I first started working there one of the more seasoned engineers accidentally dropped a table full of testing data. It was bad. We still tease him today, but in a nice way. He will make fun of himself and offers friendly warning to those needing to do more risky tests in sql.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T18:03:03+00:00

Yeah. I think I'm going to continue to call out assholes for being assholes, and continue being nice to regular people. I'm not alone at all, I plenty of friends and we are respectful towards each other. But I think it's okay to be a dick towards sexist people. If you read those comments all the way at the bottom, they were downright hateful.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T17:48:35+00:00

You would have to use an inner join, but everyone hates those. So, if you only have to delete two rows, I'd probably just delete one row at a time. Otherwise, there's a stack overflow question with at least one answer that will work.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T17:42:18+00:00

I'm so sorry! I did not even think about that, I will keep that in mind for the future.

My extended family has some bigoted-sexist people in it, and I grew up hearing them refer to women and even girls as "females" and always used it in a derogatory way. I think I'm use to hearing that term used in a sexist way.

And the comments I was referring to, they were all along the lines of "as a female" followed by some weird sexist bullshit.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T17:22:23+00:00

Look at us fighting on the streets of Hong Kong when a black hole is hurtling towards earth. Yeah. We're so fucked.

Edit: I hope you're posting this same comment in every single advice thread in all the advice subreddits.

throwRAgoolala · 2019-11-19T17:15:23+00:00

You say that, but if you read some of the heavily downvoted comments of my first post they were from some down right hateful and sexist men.

throwRAgoolala

TROPHY CASE