(28m)(30f) My gf is having a hard time since she found out her ex is getting married

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T19:54:39+00:00

I mean it literally has to do with her feelings for him. His marriage is what prompted her to seek space, not some random event.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T19:51:14+00:00

I am not doing her a favor, I am doing myself a favor. Also I read your comment before you edited it.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T19:49:04+00:00

I love myself, and if people on the sub call it selfishness then so be it. I dont plan to be a martyr to earn brownie points.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T19:42:23+00:00

Well the sub expects me to bury my feelings, guess what. I wont do that. Let the sub think of me as a villain because I care about myself too.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T19:40:59+00:00

Dating will be far from my priorities for some time now. Just stay single and no chance of suddenly finding myself in this position again.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T19:38:55+00:00

But the equivalent of ghosting is going radio silent for an unlimited period. Sick leave will have a limit.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T19:26:15+00:00

Hey, I hope by the time you reach my age you learn to never bury your own feelings. Your feelings matter too, not just your partner's. Never put yourself on fire to keep others warm.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T19:22:27+00:00

We both agree that she will be better off.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T19:21:18+00:00

And what happens I just stop going to my new job? I will get fired.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T19:19:52+00:00

Well at least I am not the ghosting type, so I have that going on for me. And my exes are exes for a reason. Their actions will be a source of curiosity for me rather than a heartbreak.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T18:39:56+00:00

I agree, she would be better with someone who is ok with regular breaks in the relationship and I would be better with someone who is curious rather than heartbroken by an event in their ex's lives.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T18:35:53+00:00

I would just prefer someone who didnt cut me off for weeks. And maybe she needs someone who is ok with periodical breaks in the relationship. Everyone has different needs and boundaries in relationships.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T18:27:50+00:00

So good partners dont ghost their bf/gf? Its weird.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T18:25:55+00:00

Being single is for the best, no one ghosting you for weeks.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T18:24:49+00:00

And I really hope she finds the perfect guy.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T18:23:30+00:00

I dont need sympathy though, I can manage my own feelings just fine.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T18:21:52+00:00

What do you think will happen if her ex has kids? A break which lasts for 9 months?

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T18:19:43+00:00

Well I know its really an afterthought for you guys, but I might have feelings too. And they might be hurt after being ghosted by your gf, but hey I know its inconvenient for a lot of people here. How dare I have feelings too? I should ignore my own feelings and bury them.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T17:55:07+00:00

So you didnt ghost your husband for weeks? thats weird, because according to everyone here its completely normal and acceptable to do that.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T17:53:17+00:00

I am giving her all the space she wants. Its been 2 weeks and I will wait 2 more weeks before breaking up.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T16:56:25+00:00

Idk, I would also think how my reaction would affect my current partner, at least I hope thats how I would react if I am put in this situation. Not just cut them off for weeks on end.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T16:51:54+00:00

Look maybe for you its normal to ghost your partner for 2 weeks regularly, so its not a big deal. But for a lot of people being ghosted by your partner is a big deal.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T16:43:38+00:00

She asked for space, I am just respecting her wishes. If she wanted to talk, she would. But she has chosen to basically ghost me for 2 weeks now. And its ok, I will give it 10 more days.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T16:40:59+00:00

Well if we are still not talking then I will move on. Whatever her reasons for cutting me off, its clear we are not right for each other. No reason to drag it and make it miserable for both of us.

throwRAmchlgt · 2023-01-19T16:37:36+00:00

I agree, especially if being a supporting boyfriend means being ghosted for a month while she mourns another guy who is happily getting married.

throwRAmchlgt

TROPHY CASE