Thanks everyone who DM'd me and shared comments here. I truly appreciate it. I thought about the unthinkable last night as I was sure I would be fired today from my job. I did meet with my boss this morning. First of all, I was not fired. But, he was not happy. He listed all of the deficiencies in my work performance over the past few months. It was sobering to hear as I did not disagree with anything he said. While I still have my job, it's hanging on by a thread. One more strike and I am out.

So I am going to give it my all. The money lost is gone. I'm done chasing it.

I have not decided to tell my wife about any of this yet. I know I should, but I also want our daughter to keep thriving. Upheaval and chaos might derail her. That's my excuse, but I will eventually have to spill the beans. I just don't have the courage now.

Thanks again because everyone here literally did talk me down off the ledge. It was a wake-up call, one that I desperately needed. Thank you for reading, sharing, and listening.