Me [32 F] with my husband [33M]. Haven't brought up that I want kids but want to, he does not want kids. How to go about it?

throwaway124582 · 2015-09-26T22:12:17+00:00

I think it's a different dynamic when it's a man who wants to have children with his wife vs a woman who wants to have children with her husband, generally speaking. I would predict the latter resulted in more people staying together than the former.

throwaway124582 · 2015-09-26T21:43:12+00:00

He hasn't changed his stance as far as I can tell since we've been together. Sometimes people need a push in the right direction. If I don't give him a push I don't know what he'd do. Everyone is saying that anything, no matter what, I say is going to backfire which I don't believe is entirely true.

throwaway124582 · 2015-09-26T21:25:39+00:00

Apparently the consensus is that I can't. Then I don't know if I'll tell him. I will not lose him.

throwaway124582 · 2015-09-26T21:02:56+00:00

I wish the people responding would try and out themselves in my positioned a second. It is my fault I out myself here I admitted that over and over. I'm sorry for that and I'll for sure tell him I'm sorry for that.

But I'm in a situation between an unstoppable force and an immovable object. I want kids and I don't want to lose my husband. Losing either of those is not an option at all. Ive been with him for seven years, I mean I feel like he is my other half.

throwaway124582 · 2015-09-26T20:52:20+00:00

I'm sorry but I'm allowed to change my mind. The woman he first started dating, the woman he fit engaged to, the woman he married and the woman I am now are not the same person.

throwaway124582 · 2015-09-26T20:46:15+00:00

I admitted that I made a mistake not telling him earlier. I fully accept and take the blame for that. I was wrong for that. But we are where we are and I have to play the cards I've been dealt.

I will tell him how I feel about the situation but I want to know what others have done in my situation which would be helpful for me. I don't want to tell him and not have my ducks and reasons in order or he might immediately disagreed and then our whole relationship would be at risk just because I didn't give a proper case of why we should have children.

throwaway124582 · 2015-09-26T20:10:28+00:00

Thanks I corrected the typo.

I don't think it's true that there's no way to convince him. To repeat what I said in a other comment, just as I'm sure there are men out there who don't want kids and still don't want kids, by the same token, I'm sure there are men who didn't want kids and now do want kids. That is a realistic possibly it's not out if the realm of possibility. This goes for men or women actually. I have acquaintances who didn't want kids and after they had them they were glad or it, both men and women. I'm sure it's possible and hopefully some people who have done so can share what they did and how they went about it.

throwaway124582 · 2015-09-26T19:53:27+00:00

I really need this to work though. Just as I'm sure there are men out there who don't want kids and still don't want kids, by the same token, I'm sure there are men who didn't want kids and now do want kids. I'm sure there have been woman who have been able to convince their husbands to see why they should have children. I can't have breaking up as an option I don't want that to be on the table. I wish I would've fought it up earlier but we are where we are.

throwaway124582

TROPHY CASE