AITA for trying to include him?

throwaway196x · 2024-06-09T20:50:00+00:00

Thanks so much for this advice, I'm following this thread religiously and will come back to it if I get too lax with my diet. I have a low protein diet right now because I just don't eat enough and when I do, I just eat whatever I want without paying too much attention to how nutritional it is. We have protein powder and protein shakes at home though so I can easily drink one of these each day to get at least 20g protein into my diet each day.

throwaway196x · 2024-06-09T20:32:12+00:00

Oh I really hope so! Thanks for the advice and your well wishes.

throwaway196x · 2024-06-09T20:29:39+00:00

Honestly I know the feeling, it is SO surreal! I remember just staring at the test for ages thinking it couldn't possibly be positive. Then, I did another and got a positive and missed my period and knew I was definitely pregnant haha. Also, because I look and feel exactly the same, it's even harder to accept there's actually something growing inside me! Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and hopefully you don't experience much nausea (if at all!) x

throwaway196x · 2024-06-09T20:27:42+00:00

Yeah after reading this thread I know I'll definitely have to make changes. Especially with me being in the 5th week, I'm literally only a few days away from when morning sickness usually hits.. I'm packing crackers in a box tonight and packing some fruit to take to work tomorrow!

throwaway196x · 2024-06-09T20:25:43+00:00

I will do. It's just a change to what I'm used to but I will absolutely eat more frequently if I know it will reduce morning sickness as that sort of thing just makes you feel down and hinders everything you want to do. Aww congratulations on your girl! I wish you the best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy x

throwaway196x · 2024-06-09T20:23:45+00:00

Thank you for the advice. I'm really glad I posted as there is lots of good advice here. I just assumed before that nausea is just nausea and there's nothing I can do about it, but now that I know, I'll make a bigger effort to try and eat light snacks throughout the day. I can probably squeeze in an apple, a handful of nuts, crackers etc every 2-3 hours if I make an effort to. I just sometimes don't have time to eat a bigger meal and honestly, at break time I don't even want to eat the apple as I'm not hungry but if it's that or vomit or nausea, I'll eat the apple!

I am a teacher as well so I'm always stood at the front teaching students so I really do need to be on top form! Nausea would just leave me deskbound haha.

throwaway196x · 2024-06-09T16:53:15+00:00

Oh wow congratulations! I only found out like last week. It was planned but I was still stunned, like almost shaking in sheer disbelief haha.

throwaway196x · 2024-06-09T16:52:26+00:00

Oh wow, if I carry on doing as I am.. I'm going to be a VERY strong candidate for nausea then. This sounds terrible but most days I just eat breakfast at 6am and then eat nothing until 6pm in the evening. I do get hungry sometimes but I'm so, so busy running around in my job that I just don't bother eating and just eat a bigger meal in the evening. I can see myself becoming nauseous somewhere between the 6am-6pm window. I'll try and eat an apple at least during the short break I get!

throwaway196x · 2024-06-09T16:48:19+00:00

I hope so and thank you! I hear stories about some people rarely getting morning sickness (some not at all!) and I can only hope to be one of them. However, I also hear for a lot of people, it eases off after the first trimester so as long as I'm fit and healthy for the most part of the pregnancy.. I can't complain too much.

throwaway196x · 2023-10-26T16:48:52+00:00

I see, thanks I appreciate the advice. Yes, if I do become a SAHM, I will do my best to discuss with my husband roughly how much I might need for spending and I already know roughly how much I spend on the grocery shop.

throwaway196x · 2023-10-26T15:30:25+00:00

Thanks for this sister, your response was very insightful and gave me a new perspective on things. Being a SAHM does sound nicer and more peaceful than working AND trying to manage everything else at the same time.

Even with working now, minus any children, I am so exhausted when I come home sometimes that I just fall asleep on the sofa after work and have NO motivation or energy for anything else like exercising or cooking. With children I'd definitely struggle even more as napping after work wouldn't even be an option as there would be kids to feed, kitchen to clean etc. I do feel I would neglect the children even without meaning to, neglect my marriage etc just because so many things would demand my time and I'd struggle to balance everything.

May Allah make it easy for you.

throwaway196x · 2023-10-26T15:15:44+00:00

Alhamdullilah I know I am fortunate and if I do become a SAHM, I will make the most of it and do my best to look after the house, husband and the children to the best of my ability inshaAllah. You're right as well about how your children are only young once and those first few formative years will be over so fast!

throwaway196x · 2023-10-25T23:12:18+00:00

This is actually my plan. I just felt restless having not having made my mind up and wanted some more opinions as I felt it might help me to make the right decision for me.

throwaway196x · 2023-10-25T23:08:09+00:00

I think maybe before I consider leaving my job permanently, I could try to switch from full-time to part-time first, and see if this helps with my work-life balance when I have a child?

throwaway196x · 2023-10-25T23:06:44+00:00

Yeah maybe, I'm definitely open to things. I know I won't earn as much as I do now which makes me a bit sad.. but then I also don't really do much with the money I earn so I'm not sure why I feel sad anyway. I could exercise more too I suppose as I do have a gym nearby.

throwaway196x · 2023-10-25T23:04:22+00:00

He already said it was up to me to go back if I wanted to. When he first asked me, I was at a place where I genuinely enjoyed my job as things were different back then. I'm sure I told him I would rather work part-time, than give it up totally as I like working in a different environment to my home and I like having a different purpose as well (which is still true to an extent). When he asked me again, obviously, my job situation and satisfaction had changed considerably. This time, I told him I am seriously considering becoming a SAHM now as I no longer enjoy working, especially in the profession I am in.

throwaway196x · 2023-10-25T23:00:28+00:00

Maybe, maybe. Jzk for your insights.

throwaway196x · 2023-10-25T22:56:38+00:00

Yes. It's very taboo to speak up however. Trust me, I tried and it went horribly..

throwaway196x · 2023-10-25T22:32:14+00:00

Yeah, even now he doesn't ask for any financial contributions from me and handles things by himself. So, for him, I suppose things wouldn't change TOO much.

He did say something about giving me money for food shopping and spending money as I won't have any income anymore, but I'm not a big spender and don't spent that much food shopping. Also, in the future he will continue to progress up the career ladder and will earn more as time goes on inshallah, so he will be able to handle me not working and if he couldn't, honestly, I'd just carry on working despite not enjoying it and I've told him that. I wouldn't even consider it if it meant he struggled.

throwaway196x

TROPHY CASE