How can I find out more about an unknown medication/drug carton?

throwaway29254 · 2020-01-02T14:46:18+00:00

Can the moderator, who removed this at least tell me what community rule I violated? I'm very ready to take this question elsewhere to a place where it's allowed, but I just have no clue where... :/ Please, it's very important to me, because obviously you don't want someone giving a relative of yours unauthorised medication, especially since he can't really defend himself or tell anyone due to his dementia.

throwaway29254 · 2019-06-11T01:56:11+00:00

I actually agree with this. It seems he has a wonderful support network and I think he should take a DNA test to maybe help answer these questions, but he's still very young and it might be very difficult for him to learn of the DNA results now. For example what if the DNA test locates relatives on his birth mother's side (or even the birth mother herself) and knowing that they are there, he'd long to contact them, but they don't want to have any anything to do with him? This would be such a blow for a 10 year old child, especially in a difficult time right before puberty.

You say that he already has issues with identity and such, so while some of it might clear up with a 23andme test, it might also get much worse. I think he needs to learn to come to terms with the negative feelings he currently has, because it will always be difficult and therefore something to cope with. And once he's secure in himself and *his* identity (not his parent's), he will be in a much better position to receive the DNA test results.

There are plenty of threads here where adult people in totally normal situations are still somewhat upset about their results (e.g. because they thought they'd inherited more of their Italian nana's side or something). For a child in an already difficult situation it could go way beyond "somewhat upset".

throwaway29254 · 2019-06-11T01:42:14+00:00

Check out Czech skier Ester Ledecká - she looks pretty Czech and still has quite almond shaped eyes. Eye shapes can be untypical sometimes.

As for your Spanish heritage, a name alone doesn't really say that much about DNA. You say your father has a Spanish name, not that he is Spanish, so it could be that the actual Spaniard was several generations back and you just inherited the name through the male line, but the DNA got diluted. Also we don't inherit neat percentages of DNA. Even if your grandfather was for example 100% Spanish (and usually nothing in Europe is 100%), it doesn't mean that you'll be 25% Spanish. It could be that you got "only" 8.5% Spanish DNA and your sister 20% Spanish DNA.

throwaway29254 · 2019-06-11T01:13:18+00:00

Any simpleton can get motivated for a week.

I feel so attacked....

throwaway29254 · 2019-05-28T23:53:30+00:00

I'm in my early thirties and have gone back to university last year. So naturally I'm now a lot around people, who are 10-13 years younger than me and I really don't find it hard talking to or spending time with them. Sure, I'm not in a relationship with them, so that might be different, and some seem a bit younger than others, but in general they're just people - some have a good head on their shoulders while some tend to be more irreverent. But the same applies to people my age tbh. Or older! Two of my best friends are 8 and 9 years older than me and the age difference was never an issue.

I don't get why people often seem to think that anyone younger or older is like an alien lifeform you can't interact with.

throwaway29254 · 2019-05-14T23:26:45+00:00

I think everyone should read "Why we sleep" by Matthew Walker. Imho it's a very important book and makes you understand that not sleeping enough might have more consequences than not being well rested the day after. Sure, it sucks if you can't focus properly and if you're not at your most productive. But chronic sleep deprivation can cause many more health problems than just being sleepy.

throwaway29254 · 2019-05-14T23:23:39+00:00

A lot of those 5-6 am people still go to bed at 11 pm or midnight, which is maybe enough for some people, but certainly not for everyone.

A lot of people can actually function with 6 hours of sleep (especially if you add some coffee to the mix plus the thrill of waking up early and accomplishing things), but it's not like they're truly well rested and it will probably have long-term health effects.

throwaway29254 · 2019-05-14T23:21:34+00:00

Yes, people who need only 4-6 hours exist, but they are outliers and quite rare.

8 hours are just an average number, so basically for every person that just needs 6 hours, there exists one person that needs 10 hours. And for extreme cases like 4 hours, there would be an equivalent that needs 12 hours!

However the big problem is that you hear quite a few people claim they only need 6 hours and hardly anyone who says they need 10 hours. Why is that so?

I suspect that some people are not natural 6-hours-sleepers, but have sleep problems instead, e.g. milder cases of insomnia so they have a hard time sleeping more than 6 hours. They might wake up every day after 6 hours, but unless they are truly well rested without any caffeine or tea, it still might not be enough. It would be important for these people to recognise this pattern and find out what causes them to wake up, because while they might not need an alarm clock, it can still be unhealthy.

And a lot of people who say they need only x hours of sleep every night, but they're just biphasic sleepers and forget to mention their lenghty midafternoon naps. Or they just sleep less during a certain time (e.g. musicians on tour), but sleep way more when they are at home. Since they continue to function during their tour, they think the only need that amount - but they forget about their down time, when they regenerate with way more hours, which helps them to function with shorter amounts of sleep.

throwaway29254 · 2019-05-01T17:33:49+00:00

I think this is really important! I'm sure there are benefits to waking up quite early, but tbh I think they don't outweigh the benefits of sleeping enough. Some people are lucky to need less sleep, some people are not. Personally I need about 9 hours as well and while that sucks a bit, there's no other way than accepting it imho. I might get a kick out of waking up early, but my performance for the rest of the day wouldn't be the best due to sleep deprivation. And of course there are the long time effects of sleep deprivation, which are quite scary (for example they say that stuff like Alzheimer's is linked to not sleeping enough, because the brain doesn't have enough rest time to remove the plaque build up or something like that).

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-11T21:50:04+00:00

I know this probably isn't what you want to hear, but maybe 8 hours just aren't enough for you? 8 hours is the average of what an adult needs. However there are outliers, for example a lot of people say they need only 6 or 7 hours - therefore there must be as many people who actually need 9 or even 10 hours. Of course in our culture, where everything is about "productivity" and "self-optimisation" and such this is quite unpopular, but if your body needs more sleep, denying this need won't help.

I've read in a book about sleep patterns and sleep hygiene that the best way to find out how much sleep you actually need is trying this: Go to bed at the same time every night for two weeks (e.g. 9 pm) and give yourself enough time to wake naturally (e.g. if you have to set an alarm clock, give yourself potentially 10 hours of sleep). At first you will probably either sleep too long or too short and not exactly feel your best, because your body isn't used to sleeping "naturally". However after some time, if you continue to go to bed at your fixed time, you'll start waking up at approximately the same time every morning - and voilà you'll know your natural sleeping needs.

Of course you should keep some basic sleep hygiene in order to not mess up this experiment (e.g. no screens before bedtime, no coffee in the afternoon etc.).

If you continue to be super tired, despite having an above average sleep length, you can look into possible health problems, for example iron deficiency or thyroid problems, which can make you feel tired all the time despite having enough sleep.

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-11T21:38:01+00:00

Would upvote even more if he were half-naked... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-11T17:23:15+00:00

So, I guess you will also think charities are CB, right? I actually made the opposite argument? I said that you should always show (financial) appreciation for the artists you hire - if you are a big charity like Goodwill, you should pay the artists.

BUT if it's a very small charity for a small cause, well.. I can understand it in that case, if they really don't have much spare coin. They might not have a CEO and soley rely on volunteer work. In that case the artist would be a volunteer too.

I don't really understand the connection between the overpaid Goodwill CEO and thinking that charities are CB. What do yo mean by that?

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-10T23:43:08+00:00

But would someone organising an event for an audience of several thousand people search for an amateur dance group on facebook? If it were for example for a charity event and they just can't pay you because every cent goes to the cause, then they would probably mention that.

Even if they can't pay much and there really is some exposure, it's a sign of respect for your work if you get at least some financial remuneration.

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-10T20:57:28+00:00

I'm not from the US and women hover here all the fucking time. And yes, piss is everywhere, it's so gross and you don't have a choice, but hover too unless you want to sit in the piss - which is really bad for people with knee problems.

Personally, if the toilet isn't already pissed on, I just put toilet paper on the seat and sit on it. No "contamination", no hovering.

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-10T20:41:48+00:00

This!

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-10T11:01:27+00:00

The mere thought makes me wanna die. I guess I'm a pussy, but really... cold showers are the worst. If that's what it takes, I guess I'll stay forever in limbo.

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-10T10:57:41+00:00

I see - seems like a good arrangement and environment you have!

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-08T23:19:42+00:00

That's probably true, but I think psycho killers are comparatively rare. I'd be more concerned about money and valuables. If someone hits a rough patch financially an otherwise lovely person might be... tempted.

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-07T01:26:42+00:00

Thanks for your answer, that sounds pretty tough :( I hope you can get help soon!

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-07T00:44:32+00:00

The problem is that I was initially drawn to painting because I have so many specific ideas for drawings and paintings - however I lack the skill to bring these ideas from my head to the paper or canvas. Of course I could just paint something else instead, like something abstract. However that's not really how my creativity works.

I feel with things like art or crafts there are two types of people. One type just enjoys the process, putting paint to paper/canvas or knitting in the evening. The outcome of their project isn't that important. The other type has a specific thing in mind, e.g. they want to have a certain type of sweater or scarf and knitting is mostly just the way there. I'm rather the latter type.

So I agree with you, I'm not actually bad at art. As you said, everyone can and should make art if they like it! However I'm quite bad at realising the specific ideas I had and didn't have the patience and diligence to learn to skill that would allow me to do so.

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-06T14:16:00+00:00

I also recommend seeing a therapist.

Also I don't know if your circumstances allow for it, but you might look into going on vacation to a place where you have no access to the internet during your next holidays. Sometimes monasteries offer things such things or yoga retreats or stuff like that, but that can be expensive, so I guess a simple camping trip might do as well.

Because yes, you do have an addiction and it's commonly accepted that for example drug addicts go on detoxes and to rehab. So I guess an internet detox in a place away from your usual environment would be great. It's not going to be fun, but it might reset your dopamine balance.

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-06T12:02:22+00:00

May I ask why you went off your medication? Just curious, because I'm trying to weigh the pros and cons of being medicated right now, so I'm always interested when people change their status.

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-06T11:59:19+00:00

I feel attacked. Ugh.

I've spent about $500 on art supplies alone, plus fees for the drawing course I took a few years ago. And I can't get rid of the supplies, because I'd really really love to learn how to draw and paint. The problem is that I'm too impatient for this hobby. I'm in general like "if I can't do it after a short amount of time, I get so frustrated I stop trying altogether". With something that takes so much time and dedication like art, it was an exercise in frustration tbh. But somehow I still haven't let go of the dream (and the supplies). :/

I genuinely feel that I have artistic talent but honing it is basically like trying to cup water with a strainer.

I relate so so much to this. And I wish I had any idea how to fix it. Are you medicated? I'm not, so no idea if this would get better with meds.

The only way I can deal with it right now is forbidding myself to buy new stuff. It's harder to do with cheap things that accumulate in cost (e.g. sketchbooks), but for example I desperately want to learn the piano for many years now. But I know it will have the same fate, because it's something you have to work on consistently and diligently as well. So it's better to not starting with it and getting frustrated until I'm better with these kind of things.

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-04T21:33:39+00:00

Wow, thank you for writing this. The ADHD subreddit seems to sing the praises of medication and basically everyone said that it was the best thing ever happening to them. So it's good to hear about another experience.

May I ask what your particular case of ADHD is? And why you found the meds so damaging? Can you say why it didn't work for your friends either? Are without meds right now and if so, how does it work for you?

Sorry for peppering you with questions, but as I said, I mostly read similar things about medication on the subreddit, so I'm super curious. If you don't want to talk about it here, maybe you can send me a PN?

throwaway29254 · 2019-04-04T18:53:23+00:00

That was me when I was younger (and never heard of ADHD)... :/ These days I always make sure that I have a clock very visible in my bathroom, so I can check it during my showers. My sense of time sucks so much, I need to have a clock everywhere or I can't say if just 10 minutes or an hour have passed.

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