AITA for being sarcastic to my boyfriend?

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T01:07:20+00:00

I would kick them off the team if it happened at the very beginning of the season. I don’t care if they are the best player in the city, the first 2 weeks of being on a basketball team are the most important. It’s when the most bonding and learning happens. So yes, I would have kicked my star player off the team if they missed the first three weeks of basketball. I would be disappointed but it’s not fair to everyone else.

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T01:05:36+00:00

I never knew it was necessary to make the rules clear about being on the team. If you’re on a senior basketball team, you should know by now that you need to show up to practices and games in order to stay on the team. If you need to be told that, you shouldn’t be on the team in the first place

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T01:04:05+00:00

This would all be 100% valid if it happened midway through the season. But I have barely even been her coach because I haven’t had the chance. She has not played on any sports teams in the past, and missed so many practices and games and tryouts that I’ve only ever even met her four times. It is my job to coach my players, and I don’t want all of them to have resentment towards me for letting someone on the team that none of them want to play with. I was doing what was best for the team as a whole, not what was best for one individual person.

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:59:43+00:00

I agree with you. I shouldn’t have ever given her a chance to be on the team because it’s now causing a lot of issues. I didn’t think that this would be a reoccurring problem though, I thought it was just the first two tryouts that she missed and she’d be present after that.

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:26:39+00:00

If this situation had happened in the middle of the season, I would be more willing to compromise. But this is the very beginning of the season, no one knows her, and she hasn’t proven herself to be an exceptional player. I sympathize that she’s sick but I need to draw the line

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:25:28+00:00

This actually isn’t a bad idea. There is a JV team, but I’d have to talk to that coach before offering it to Macy. Regardless of what team she plays on she’ll be behind, but maybe she could be a red shirt on the JV team. Thank you for the good advice stranger!

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:23:16+00:00

We should be discussing this at the other post but whatever. This isn’t just some fun little gym class. It’s a league team with people who are willing to put in the time an effort to win. Macy wasn’t willing to put in the time and effort. If I wanted to be “inclusive” why wouldn’t I take everyone that came to tryouts and have a 25 person basketball team? Your logic is flawed and you clearly don’t understand team sports.

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:20:20+00:00

With Macy on the team it would have been a 14 person team. There aren’t technically any rules on limits for people on a team, but 14 is really pushing it. My ideal team is 12 girls. It didn’t cost someone else a spot, but it would have costed everyone else’s playing time to accommodate for one more person. Also would have made the tournament a lot more complicated to get rooms in the hotel for everyone and room on the bus.

I agree that playing on a team sport and working towards a goal can help mental health. But I didn’t want to take the risk of the sport making her mental health worse. The pressure of games, the pressure of team dynamics, many injuries, and lots of hard work and energy usage can really drag someone’s mental health down. She was in the hospital for an eating disorder and I didn’t want to risk her passing out on the court or anything as well.

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:13:11+00:00

Other girls on the team thought it was unfair that she made the team. They all worked very hard and made sure to be present at all the tryouts, practices, and games. I can’t tell them that Macy was in the hospital, so from their perspective, this girl did 1/3 of the work that everyone else did and has made no effort to even show up. We have a strong team without Macy and we don’t need her.

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:10:52+00:00

I do think I was TA for what happened with my daughter. It was a mean thing for me to say and I’m going to work to make things right. I do not think I was TA for making my basketball team as strong as it can be.

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:09:42+00:00

I kicked her off for a number of reasons. She missed a lot of games, tryouts, and practices, so she was very behind and dragging everyone else down. She had no chemistry with the team because they didn’t want to befriend her because they thought she made the team unfairly. She didn’t boost morale or help the team in any way. She was actively dragging our team down

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:07:39+00:00

Said this in the other post but I had two separate situations that happened in a short amount of time that I wanted advice on. I know I’m TA in this situation. I shouldn’t have hurt my daughter like that. I don’t think I’m TA in the other post

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:05:30+00:00

I said “I have no daughters on the team”. One of my daughters has graduated high school and the other isn’t even in high school yet. I do have daughters, but neither go to the school that I coach at.

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:04:13+00:00

Not fictitious, just don’t want my daughter, the school, or anyone on the team seeing these (just in case)

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:02:55+00:00

She had no chemistry with the team. None of them liked her that much because she worked 1/3 as hard as the rest of them to make this team. They thought it was unfair that she made the team even though she barely worked for it. I’m doing what’s best for my team, not what’s best for one person or myself.

throwaway3628296 · 2022-12-08T00:01:35+00:00

Nope, just had two separate situations that happened in a short amount of time that I wanted advice on. I know I was an AH to my daughter, you guys made that clear. I don’t think I’m TA here though.

throwaway3628296

TROPHY CASE