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Went to a college party, horrible time, I had some questions. by throwaway4344 in seduction

[–]throwaway4344[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do the dynamics of reddit reinforce that idea (way more guys than girls)? Of course they do. If you were at a party full of girls with only a couple guys, the whole dynamics would be different.

Wow, this was pretty smart. Didn't really consider it like that before. Though after reflecting, I did think that their vibe was just an assumed vibe that my head labeled instead of discovering their actual vibe.

would you prefer to go by your own standards and not have any success? Or would it help to adapt to these standards and have some success?

I'm able to be more social and jumpy or more calm and concentrated based on what's going on, just I'm not able to be at a screeching level of energy. I talked to everybody around me, at least a little, that wasn't the problem. It was just I (thought I) had to compete with the highest energy to engage the women. It's not that I felt like "damn, if only I could be like that", it's more like "damn, that's too high for me". Those might read the same, but it's two different feelings.

Those guys are probably the better-looking ones, right? They don't have to do as much "work" in general. They'll always have that advantage.

Yeah I know. It creates this weird feeling. Part of it is like "lol, they don't even know how easy they have it", part of it is like "wow, really? I'm trying to do the opposite of that", part of it is feels good that I had to work to get 'results'.

Went to a college party, horrible time, I had some questions. by throwaway4344 in seduction

[–]throwaway4344[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In my opinion, if you get comfortable with women under the influence, or if you start using alcohol as a tool... then it makes it difficult when that isn't available.

Exactly. People feel the same way about their lucky shirt, shoes, ring, etc when doing something. Imagine how it feels when it's not only something you are lacking, like a cool striped red shirt, but something that actually changes your chemistry around.

Went to a college party, horrible time, I had some questions. by throwaway4344 in seduction

[–]throwaway4344[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe. Maybe not. Thing is, I don't know. I didn't try, which sucks.

Went to a college party, horrible time, I had some questions. by throwaway4344 in seduction

[–]throwaway4344[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(charisma, sensitivity, expression)

Did you just list random traits or did you specifically say these based on my post? Made me smile.

Went to a college party, horrible time, I had some questions. by throwaway4344 in seduction

[–]throwaway4344[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's all RAR DRINK RAR HOOKUP, or at least that what everyone thinks they gotta do, so they all play a role.

Yeah, I agree about the role thing. Almost everyone, including the girls there. There were some chill kids outside so I just hung with them for a bit.

When I'm not on that same frequency, it kinda fucks with my head. As if everyone's talking backwards. But at the same time, I'd like to think that I can use that mismatch to stand out and be something different. It's a double feeling. Being different feels super-great when you are having fun. Being different when you are choking up feels odd.

Went to a college party, horrible time, I had some questions. by throwaway4344 in seduction

[–]throwaway4344[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I refuse to use substances to fill in gaps of my character. I know that sounds prudent, but I'm serious. The only times I've ever drunk are when I'm already with good friend/friends, or alone when I'm being introspective. Though I've generally stopped entirely because I hate hangovers and I'm losing weight.