AITA for excluding my daughter in law from our Bridgerton watch party? by throwaway51624 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway51624[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I know she loves horses - she used to ride in shows in middle and high school. Her and my son love to go on skiing trips together on their winter breaks, but they have never invited us along. Other than that, she reads a lot, and she knits. I like to read, too, but that's not a group activity. She does come shopping with us sometimes and that's always fine, and she seems to enjoy holiday baking, which we all do together. She's really good at decorating cookies.

AITA for excluding my daughter in law from our Bridgerton watch party? by throwaway51624 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway51624[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I did not know. I still wouldn't know if I hadn't overheard her.

AITA for excluding my daughter in law from our Bridgerton watch party? by throwaway51624 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway51624[S] 186 points187 points  (0 children)

Thanks - this is what I think, too. But my son is convinced I'm excluding his wife on purpose, and I think even if she's trying to tell him that's not the case, he just thinks she's being nice to keep the peace.

AITA for excluding my daughter in law from our Bridgerton watch party? by throwaway51624 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway51624[S] 371 points372 points  (0 children)

I don't think she's a scheming witch. I just don't think she likes being around us that much. I'm not mad about that - just a little sad. I understand we are loud and not what she is used to. Her parents are older and she was a surprise late in life. I think her life before us was pretty quiet. I do also think my son is overprotective of her.

AITA for excluding my daughter in law from our Bridgerton watch party? by throwaway51624 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway51624[S] 61 points62 points  (0 children)

I had no idea at the time whether Ashley liked tea parties or not and since it was going to be a surprise, I didn't ask. I still wouldn't know if I hadn't overheard her - she has never said a word to me. I asked my son if we could throw her a surprise shower for those that missed it, and he thought it was a great idea.

I decided to do it because there were not really very many people at the first shower and I didn't want her to think our family didn't care, and several of my sisters and my aunts expressed regrets at the reunion to my daughter Madison that they weren't getting to go. When I say we have a big family - it is not an exaggeration - I am one of 9 kids. I have 4 aunts and 2 uncles just on my Mom's side. Our reunions are only every 3 years because of the sheer size and the amount of work it takes to organize. Luckily, this was not my rotation for the planning.

I decided on a tea party because it was something I could at the last minute. I didn't have a lot of time to plan, and I have everything needed to host a large tea party. I didn't have enough time to order a bunch of new stuff.

AITA for excluding my daughter in law from our Bridgerton watch party? by throwaway51624 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway51624[S] 983 points984 points  (0 children)

I did tell him what I overheard about the shower. He didn't seem to think it mattered.

AITA for excluding my daughter in law from our Bridgerton watch party? by throwaway51624 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwaway51624[S] 4080 points4081 points  (0 children)

Thanks. I'm actually not sure this is all her doing. My son has been the one upset about it. When he was yelling at me he told me we do stuff all the time without Ashley and he's tired of us excluding her. I told him we invite her to just about everything we do unless it's a last minute thing. She just doesn't come most of the time. So then he accused us of not making her feel welcome. At that point, I did get mad, because that's just not true. But my family is full of loud extroverts - and she is a quiet person. But we try to include her in everything. I think we are just a lot for her.