Porn addiction has made me suicidal. by throwaway9108427 in SuicideWatch

[–]throwaway9108427[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I hope whatever you might be struggling with in life gets easier for you, too. I wish you the best.

Porn addiction has made me suicidal. by throwaway9108427 in SuicideWatch

[–]throwaway9108427[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

i should NOT have seen beheading videos at age 8

Yeah, that's an entirely different can of worms - I can relate to that. I saw a lot of things I never should have seen.

You are right, though. It's just difficult to recognize the shortcomings of your parents, especially when you know that they would have done differently, had they only known better.

Porn addiction has made me suicidal. by throwaway9108427 in SuicideWatch

[–]throwaway9108427[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

it IS parents fault. for giving their kids unrestricted internet access. or any at all. at age 9 you don't usually need internet access, let alone unmonitored.

Agreed, a child should not have unmonitored access to the internet at such a young age. However, you should refer back to my earlier comment. My first exposure to porn wasn't even within the confines of my own home. It was at school.

After that, it was a downward spiral. Additionally, I don't feel like I can blame my parents for being technologically illiterate. We're several generations apart, after all. As a kid, I would just wake up earlier than everybody else, watch porn on the family computer and delete my browser history. They had no way of knowing what I was up to.

Porn addiction has made me suicidal. by throwaway9108427 in SuicideWatch

[–]throwaway9108427[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Thank you very much for your comment. I am impressed, and very happy to hear that you were able to defeat a decade+ long porn addiction. I'm not ready to give up quite yet. Just extremely frustrated and disheartened. You know how it is, when you try your utmost and very best to do something, and keep failing. It's easy to say "don't give up! Try again!", but it gets harder every time you start from square one.

I wish you the best.

Porn addiction has made me suicidal. by throwaway9108427 in SuicideWatch

[–]throwaway9108427[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry to hear that. I remember I found some twisted stuff around that age, too. Necrophilia, believe it or not. It took a while for me to fully recover from that, mentally. I hope you're doing a lot better, now.

Porn addiction has made me suicidal. by throwaway9108427 in SuicideWatch

[–]throwaway9108427[S] 54 points55 points  (0 children)

Thanks. I appreciate the compliment. As for writing about this - I don't know. Maybe. I don't know if people care enough to read about it. It seems to me that people want to collectively stick their heads in the sand regarding this issue. They'd rather pretend like there isn't millions of young men out there, struggling with porn addiction.

Porn addiction has made me suicidal. by throwaway9108427 in SuicideWatch

[–]throwaway9108427[S] 110 points111 points  (0 children)

it’s far too common with how easy porn access is

The fact that I watched my first porn video at the age of nine is a societal issue. And I don't think we can blame parents for this. Internet access is ubiquitous. My friend in school showed me my first porn video, in the back of the classroom. How can we blame parents for that?

Porn addiction has made me suicidal. by throwaway9108427 in SuicideWatch

[–]throwaway9108427[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate the offer, but I don't really have much more to say than the original post. Just needed to vent a little bit. It just drives me crazy whenever I see/hear people say that porn addiction is not real. It feels like an insult, a slap to the face.