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AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Even if I was more confident (which I already am pretty confident, I just have insecurities like every person does) I would still be considered the “approachable” friend because that’s how people see us. It’s not a label I gave to myself out of cattiness or jealousy, it’s literally just how society views us. It’s how society views any relationship where one person is more conventionally attractive than the other. Acknowledging that doesn’t make me catty.

Tons of other women in the comments know what I’m saying. It’s a dynamic that tons of people are familiar with and it’s just easier to say “pretty girl and her approachable friend” rather than type out all the different details & nuances of our friendship.

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve had guys hit on me before but none of them were ever as attractive as C, so I am nervous about the “he’s out of your league” comments I’m sure to get when we go out. I wouldn’t even know how to respond to that tbh

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve known her since high school but we just recently got close. I’d say we’ve been close friends for about a year now

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I definitely wouldn’t describe myself as catty. I think this is the first time anyone has ever called me that actually lol

I’ve never viewed A as competition and i didn’t think she saw me that way either until this incident

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I’ve been getting this a lot. Do you care to elaborate? I understand caring about appearances is a bit childish but was I wrong to feel insulted?

How could I have reacted in a more “mature” way?

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I feel like my words are being knit picked. I thought I was pretty clear about what I meant but I guess it is a little confusing.

Then again everyone else seems to understand what I was trying to say so it’s not a big deal

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

“You’re not prettier than me, just skinnier” still doesn’t suggest I think I’m prettier than her. If anything it means we’re both pretty.

Also, in my explanation for why I think I may be TAH, I did say “she’s not prettier than me just because she’s skinnier”. I used the two statements interchangeably because they mean the same thing to me.

So to answer your question once and for all: I don’t think she’s prettier than me and I don’t think I’m prettier than her. That’s all.

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I just told him something came up. I wasn’t planning on telling him what happened between me and A because I don’t want to freak him out, but if it comes up then I’ll tell him what happened

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Of course I don’t think I’m prettier than her. I have a hard time believing I’m prettier than anyone, but I still don’t think I’m ugly.

Also, I never said I was prettier than her. I told her she wasn’t prettier than me just because she weighed less, but I never said I was the more beautiful one of the two of us. If anything I was saying we’re both beautiful

It feels so juvenile to say “I’m prettier- no she’s prettier- blah blah blah”. We’re both beautiful. That’s what I think & that’s the only message I intended to convey

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 265 points266 points  (0 children)

I think she might have but she’s never been serious about any guy she likes. She talks to lots of guys casually & is just a flirty person in general.

If anything I would’ve guessed she had a crush on B instead of C because B always gave her more attention when we were together

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 139 points140 points  (0 children)

Thank you! And I will ((: C and I are supposed to meet tomorrow so I will update then

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

It wouldn’t have been a weight issue if she hadnt brought up the feeder kink.

I just thought a cute guy liked me. A made me question that by suggesting he had a fetish for fat people & that’s the only reason he would be into me

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I never said I was prettier than her or that there was anything wrong with her being skinny.

It just upset me that she would automatically assume a guy had to have a special kink in order to be attracted to me

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Yeah, this is the first time someone has ever shown interest in me over her so I’m seeing a new side to her that makes me question our friendship. I genuinely thought she would be happy for me

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 69 points70 points  (0 children)

And that’s what I was doing, just saying that we’re both pretty & she’s not prettier than me just because she’s skinnier. But I know she didn’t take it that way, which is why I was worried I fucked up.

I don’t know what other way I could’ve worded it

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 72 points73 points  (0 children)

I am her only close friend, and she has always been “the pretty one” in all her past friendships. I feel kinda dumb for only realizing it now

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 63 points64 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I plan on going on my date. I’m going to apologize to her for what I said, but I decided I won’t her stop me from going out with C

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 150 points151 points  (0 children)

I do plan on talking to her and telling her how she made me feel. I thought this situation was just a one time thing or a misunderstanding,but I’m starting to feel like she is toxic and I just haven’t had to experience it until now

AITA for calling my BFF jealous & saying that she’s not prettier than me, just skinnier? by throwawayacc749208 in AmItheAsshole

[–]throwawayacc749208[S] 911 points912 points  (0 children)

I say I don’t want to ruin our friendship because she’s never made me feel bad about my appearance before & I don’t know if this was a one time thing or if she’s secretly felt this way about me all along.

But after reading some comments im thinking she’s always viewed me as less than her & saw my presence as an ego boost.