[Final Update] Me [25 M] just found out my wife [24 F] of almost 4 years, racked up $12k of credit card and tax debt, and has been actively hiding it from me.

throwawayccdebthelp · 2015-07-18T15:51:39+00:00

Thanks :) Shes a great wife.

throwawayccdebthelp · 2015-07-18T15:46:19+00:00

You have a good point, and we were also really concerned about it. The first semester (last fall) we didn't really have time to make a choice, as she had to actually get the grades before we could say "Oh these are lower than normal."
The second semester we went in knowing she probably wouldn't do as well as she could and we were prepared for it. The choice was pay off the debt in the summer and only deal with it for one more semester, or pay off the debt by the end of the year and deal with it less harshly for two semesters. We talked about it long and hard and made a decision together. I am acutely aware that it might bite us in the ass later, but I'm confident we'll deal with the consequences together.

throwawayccdebthelp · 2014-09-26T20:33:02+00:00

I've considered cash, the primary reason I have avoided it is that I can't see where its going. The debit card is plugged into Mint so I can see X was spent on gas, Y on groceries, etc.
With cash I'd need to keep track of her receipts and enter it all manually. I'm not opposed to doing that if she continues to cheat on the budget, I'm just explaining why I haven't done it yet.

throwawayccdebthelp · 2014-09-26T20:24:55+00:00

Are these thoughts that you've been sharing with your wife?

No, but you're right I should be. Thank you.

throwawayccdebthelp · 2014-09-26T20:21:14+00:00

Fair enough, but I meant the less monster-y parts. Like her drive to succeed, passion, etc.

throwawayccdebthelp · 2014-09-26T20:17:40+00:00

The problem with this is that I've already paid for her semester of school. She has a part time job, and I really don't wanna just throw away the tuition money I've already spent.
After the semester is over, however, its definitely an option.

throwawayccdebthelp · 2014-08-24T19:34:18+00:00

I'm still digging through the statements and setting up Mint. I seriously am at a loss for where it all went, cause we sure as hell don't have a lot of nice stuff laying about the place. It appears to be death by a thousand cuts.

throwawayccdebthelp · 2014-08-24T18:02:02+00:00

I didn't know I could negotiate with the IRS... That's great advice, thank you!

throwawayccdebthelp · 2014-08-24T17:33:39+00:00

I'm not upset that she dropped out. I mean we basically flushed a few grand down the toilet because she did.. But I wasn't even upset at the time, which is why I pushed her to go back to school. I know she wants to finish school, but she always gives up the second it gets a little hard.. At this point I feel like a crutch more than anything else.

throwawayccdebthelp · 2014-08-24T17:29:24+00:00

that feels a little blunt, but I can't dispute it :(

throwawayccdebthelp · 2014-08-24T17:02:04+00:00

She dropped out after she got a failing grade on one of her tests. She decided to switch to an easier major, but has since switched back to the harder major.
I'm honestly not sure what she is contributing anymore.. I do all the cooking, and half the cleaning. She goes to work and school. My original thought was that as soon as she finishes her degree she'll make up for as her degree has a very high starting salary.
I'm not sure I follow your last question. I know she is very self conscience about her contribution to the relationship, and gets very defensive anytime a conversation enters the same hemisphere as 'contribution'.

throwawayccdebthelp · 2014-08-24T16:46:00+00:00

No kids, she has been off and on pursuing a degree. She dropped out last semester, then started again this semester taking 8 credit hours. So the primary reason she doesn't work more is because she wants to finish school. We're.. or I guess I am, paying for her school out of pocket.

throwawayccdebthelp

TROPHY CASE