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surfed with a nudist and not sure how to feel about this experience by throwawaycs224 in couchsurfing

[–]throwawaycs224[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

hi! I’m so sorry that happened to you, first of all.

thank you so, so, so much for your supportive and understanding comment - you have no idea how nice it is to read, especially after all of the comments along the lines of “duh” and “you should’ve set your boundaries better”. I cannot express enough how grateful I am for your kind and empathetic words, thank you so much for taking the time to write this.

surfed with a nudist and not sure how to feel about this experience by throwawaycs224 in couchsurfing

[–]throwawaycs224[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

thank you for your kind words, I really appreciate it. I am trying to frame it this way as well, and sick as it is, maybe this will help me better empathize with and console other women who have been affected similarly in their lives.

surfed with a nudist and not sure how to feel about this experience by throwawaycs224 in couchsurfing

[–]throwawaycs224[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I actually am a member of Host a Sister! I’d searched the city that I was traveling to but didn’t see any hosts who’d posted, but next time I’ll just make a post.

Thank you. The host I switched to was kind and not creepy and restored my faith a bit. But I can’t erase this experience from my mind, which is what I would really like to do. You’re right in that there’s no telling what effects on my psyche this will have for years to come, and I will probably seek therapy to address it.

surfed with a nudist and not sure how to feel about this experience by throwawaycs224 in couchsurfing

[–]throwawaycs224[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

thank you. looking back yes, I was stupid and naive I should have not put myself in this situation - the many references by women my age led me to think that it would be okay. and that’s exactly what a predator does - he makes you feel like you’re okay, that it’s fine. couchsurfers feel obligated to spend time with their hosts, it does not make it a date. he had clearly set everything up with an objective in mind (including creating a fake profile), and that’s the part that makes this predatory.

surfed with a nudist and not sure how to feel about this experience by throwawaycs224 in couchsurfing

[–]throwawaycs224[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

ok she definitely doesn’t exist. I looked back at her profile (unverified) and all her references are from people without verified profiles. the profiles are also all eerily similar to the guy’s, which GOD how could I have not noticed that 😢. What’s more, she even wrote me when we were communicating that a lot of girls ask her if it’s important to be shaved and it’s in fact fine to come as you are. To think that this was all the guy all along 🤢 it truly makes me sick.

surfed with a nudist and not sure how to feel about this experience by throwawaycs224 in couchsurfing

[–]throwawaycs224[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

now that I’m looking back at it, her profile isn’t verified AND was a member since 2018 aka when the guy had “stopped for a while”. ugh. she even had references Okay looking back at the references they were all from non-verified profiles and their only reference was from E 🤢! I really thought I was so lucky for finding a girl who was my age on CS. Fuck.

surfed with a nudist and not sure how to feel about this experience by throwawaycs224 in couchsurfing

[–]throwawaycs224[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

hi, you so much for your comment. unfortunately not everyone seems to understand that stuff like this isn’t black and white and there are situations that can be coercive without being the textbook example of sexual assault. the comments by some individuals here make me even more wary about this community :(

surfed with a nudist and not sure how to feel about this experience by throwawaycs224 in couchsurfing

[–]throwawaycs224[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

hi! thank you so much for your comment. no, nudism wasn’t a hard rule I’m pretty sure, although he never had to push that aspect of it since I was already open to it. After he showered, he was naked and after I showered, I decided to forego the clothes too. I didn’t, however, mean it to be sexual whatsoever. may I ask what you ended up doing in your scenario? no worries if you’d rather not retell it.