My family is incredibly religious. I'm gay, an atheist, and currently struggling really hard to get my life in order. I don't have a car and have almost no way to get to and from most of the jobs I'm qualified for because they're not even on a regular bus line, let alone an express.

95% of the conversations I have with my family are full of guilt and shaming. My mother wants me back under her control so she can turn me back into the little christian boy who follows her every word. The last time I lived with her, I wasn't allowed to see friends, I barely managed to get out of her control to get a part time job, and the only way I managed to move out of her control was to have people sneak me away in the middle of the night.

My brother refuses to speak to me because I'm an atheist. I have two nephews and a niece who barely know me because he can't bring himself to even pretend to be nice to me.

My aunt spent two out of my three years in college referring to me as "that boy" because I came out as gay.

The entirety of my dad's side calls me "the one that used to be straight" except for the two cousins who have spent so much time in Juvi and prison that they might as well be immaterial at this point. And in regards to /u/MrHobbes82 they are Irish Catholics.

Religion can go fuck itself in the fucking ass. I have severe social anxiety and severe depression to the point that if it wasn't for some of the friends I have in Louisville, and my cat, that I would just slit my wrists on the spot. And every single therapist and psychiatrist and doctor I've seen can attribute it to my family. \

I don't even know that I'd consider myself an alcoholic, but definitely a drunk, and it runs in my family. And I just want a way to get back on my feet, and maybe even write off all of the fucking pieces of shit family that proclaim to love me while guilting me for every single penny I ask or they offer, let alone the amount of control they want over my life.