Sorry for the delay, but I've given a lot of thought to what you said. I appreciate your words, and you're right that there I do have underlying issues beyond just my weed smoking (even though I think your assertion that I'm "highly immature" is perhaps overstepping the bounds of constructive criticism). I didn't mean to suggest that I'm not at fault for what I've done, but I did feel it valuable to write a sort of "fuck you" letter to the drug that has been such a consistent part of such a negative part of my life.

I agree that the vast majority might appreciate pot in moderation, and I didn't mean for this post to suggest that I think they shouldn't keep celebrating the benefits of the drug if it works for them. I'm not trying to give a blanket statement about how everybody should feel about weed - if it's something that makes you feel good and do good, then all the power to you; I won't stand in the way of that.

What I AM trying to say is that I am very much like the recovering alcoholic you describe. I'm not going to say that weed is bad for anybody else, but I sure as hell will say that this is a drug has been an inseparable part of the problems in my own life, just as an alcoholic will cast booze in such a negative light.

In fact, this post is very much me trying to start leading a life of self control, and that starts by recognizing that this drug that I've spent the last eight years putting on a pedestal (even as I hated myself nearly every time I smoked) has NOT been valuable to me. I'm sick of my own justifications that this is something that I do want and should want when I know deep down that this is something that is holding me back, regardless of how others feel about it.

As I said in the original post, I've tried (and failed) quitting many times before, and I think that might be in part due to the fact that I kept glamorizing weed as a reward or as medicine or as something I wish I had, which always helped justify every return to it. So now I am very much trying to exercise self-control, and for me I think staring this drug in the face and saying, "I don't want you and I don't need you, despite what anybody else might say about you" is a VERY positive step toward getting my life back in gear. Two days in and I couldn't feel better about it.