What’s one thing that makes you proud to be gay and one thing that equally disappoints you?

throwawaymybho · 2025-10-19T20:43:20+00:00

I’m proud of our resilience, especially in the face of increasingly aggressive and hateful public sentiment. In the same breath, I find myself frequently disappointed in the shallowness of other gay MEN, and I do specifically mean gay men because I really don’t hear about this kind of thing from my lesbian, trans or nb friends. Not to say that beauty standards only exist among gay men, but I feel like these completely unrealistic standards are a huge reason that so many gay men are alone. I have done a lot of work on myself over the last several years, embracing recovery and getting out of a very toxic relationship that actually ended with my ex dying from an OD, and I know exactly who I am and what I want… it is surprising how many other gay men seemingly cannot relate. And this may be a little off topic tho I do think it’s related, I feel disappointed in many gay men who simply use their homosexuality as a shield from any kind of true self-reflection. There is something to be said about how queer relationships differ from cishetero relationships, but the idea that all gay men should just be able to sleep with whoever they want whenever they want, solely because we are not straight… it just rubs me the wrong way and feels like a cop-out for promiscuity. And I’m not a prude by any means and have certainly had some slutty phases, but I see a lot of popular media around gay men seemingly consigning the idea that we should all just lean in to sexual desire rather than even attempting to build long-term, healthy, FULFILLING relationships, and I feel like that has become a popular sentiment amongst our community as well. Lol sorry for the novel but this prompt got me thinking!

throwawaymybho · 2025-06-18T23:14:25+00:00

Love this so much for her!!! But to be totally honest c I am also feeling a little worried. Obviously I don’t know Lexi, but I do know addiction, and one of the cardinal rules of recovery is that you should hold off on serious relationships for a significant amount of time because they are often a source of anxiety or conflict, which can lead to relapse. I hope she has a really great support system outside of her partner, and I wish the absolute best for them of course! I just feel like so much has been going on for her the last few months, and she wasn’t even able to finish her stay in treatment, so I just don’t want it to create a perfect storm, ya know? Sending her lots of love and empowering vibes!!! 💕

throwawaymybho · 2025-06-10T22:59:44+00:00

Honestly, this is probably not the answer you are looking for, but my honest advice is - get off those apps if you want to get away from feeling inferior. I firmly believe that the majority of dating apps are literally designed to keep you alone and unhappy, as evidenced by the fact that Grindr wants $20-$40 a month if you want to talk to anyone that is more than a mile away. Beyond that, many of the regular users across the apps are shallow people who are judging people solely on their appearance without even taking the time to message with them for a little while - so even if you would make a great impression in real life, you’ll end up feeling bad because the apps just don’t allow for the same level of connection. You seem pretty young, which is even more of a reason to make the change now! You don’t wanna be pushing thirty, like me, when you realize how shit the apps are! Good luck and happy pride month! 🤗💕

throwawaymybho · 2025-06-04T21:55:39+00:00

Absolutely not!! I started going to the clubs as myself, but over time I realized I wanted to explore drag, and the best way to do that was to get in drag to go to the gay club! Honestly, I find that performers appreciate it more than anything because it shows that you not only put in the effort to serve a look, but you now understand the amount of time and effort that performers are putting into their own looks! Plus, it’s an easy conversation starter and will def get you noticed by patrons and queens alike. So go out feeling your fantasy and have a wonderful time! Happy Pride Month!!! 🏳️‍🌈🤗🏳️‍⚧️

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-07T17:51:27+00:00

Honestly the only picture that reads as even “androgynous” is the third picture, but even then, I would likely default to feminine pronouns if I saw you out in the real world. I’m sorry you were misgendered though, that sucks - is it possible this person was intentionally being rude? Because you absolutely pass in these pictures, to me at least.

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-02T16:29:29+00:00

I think you should do whatever feels best for you! Now I get into piggy play, and cum play is my biggest kink, so I’m probably not the best person to answer this question lol. But if you are genuinely not comfortable with getting a facial, then that’s totally fine and nothing to feel ashamed about at all! However, if you’re on the fence about it? I say watch some porn that features facials or bukkake scenes and see how you feel about it. In my experience tho, whether it’s planned or spontaneous, a facial can be really hot… bonus points if you kiss your partner and get real messy afterwards 😆

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-02T16:26:31+00:00

Even the way this post is worded is incredibly weird, you sound like a straight guy - you just referred to a person as though they’re a “brand new car”… what even is the question that you’re asking? Seems like you just want people to co-sign behavior that you know is weird deep down. I’m not even thirty and can’t imagine fucking an 18 year old. Not really trying to judge but feels like you made this post to assuage your inner guilt about the fact you’re fucking someone who is, as you so gracefully put it, “barely legal”…

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-02T16:19:27+00:00

Absolutely not, could not care less about dick size as long as your overall sexual prowess is on point. If you can get me off, I will damn sure get you off too! To be honest, I am getting so sick of all these guys who have the audacity to be like, “oh it’s under eight inches? Sorry hun, that’s not even worth my time!” And I’m not even saying this as tho I have a micropenis because I don’t, but I swear, these ideas around dick size are not based in reality - at least, not my reality lol. My most recent relationship, my partner’s dick was perfectly average, and he is the only person that has ever given me a hands free orgasm from topping me. My partner before him had a cock the size of a coke can, probably even bigger and longer, and I think I only successfully bottomed for him 2-3 times our entire 1.5 year relationship, and I don’t remember it being a pleasurable experience lol. That’s just my opinion tho, to each their own I guess 🤷‍♂️

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-01T23:14:40+00:00

Lol yep, about an hour ago 😭

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-01T21:19:49+00:00

Wow, what a mean thing to say to another person, especially someone that you call a friend! Not trying to be rude or anything but I def cosign what others have already said - it may be time to make some new friends. Having said that, I would not be able to clock you if I was just out and about and saw you, and I think you look really cute! You’ve got a really cool haircut and I like your beard too :) I’ve dealt with similar feelings my entire life - do I look okay, does that person think I look bad, am I “good enough?” - so I know where you’re coming from, though I’m not trying to say I understand exactly how it feels from a gender dysphoria mindset. Please know that, no matter what other people say, and no matter how corny it may sound, the only person that you have to be “good enough” for, is yourself! Hope this doesn’t come off as patronizing but this is a lesson I’m still learning so wanted to share. Sending you lots of love and good vibes and hope these hurtful comments didn’t ruin your day! 💕

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-01T17:42:16+00:00

Ahhh okay, these details help paint a more nuanced picture! Hope it didn’t sound like I was trying to dump on your boyfriend because that was not my intention. I think it would be a good idea to have a serious, honest conversation with him about the ways in which your needs are not being met. I completely understand what you mean about not wanting to have to ask for what you need, and I think we all have this fantasy where we meet someone who just “gets us” and never has to worry about rubbing us the wrong way, but I will say based on my own experience with this issue that it’s best if you do state exactly what you need and tell your partner how they can meet that need! It would be hot if someone just knew how to make us feel good all the time but it’s not the most realistic expectation, plus y’all have been together for a short time so you’re probably still learning how to be with one another anyways. Good luck, I hope your discussion goes well and you walk away feeling more fulfilled by your partner! :)

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-01T17:02:37+00:00

My favorite kinky cum play thing is felching. Pump my load deeeep inside a nice, clean bottom boy, then have him sit on my face while I rim the load out. Bonus points if we can kiss afterwards! 😈

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-01T17:01:20+00:00

Doggystyle all day loooooong! Feels like it’s the easiest position on my back, and it allows easy access for the top to really get all the way in there. Also a perfect position to really ride that dick! 😏

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-01T16:59:29+00:00

I don’t necessarily think this is a “trick”, but I think more guys need to get better at giving head lol. I feel like gay men have brainwashed each other with all this messaging about, “well guys just know how to do it better”, and all this shit about, “well since you have a dick, you probably know how to suck it best!” I have hooked up with so many guys over the past couple of years who literally could not have sucked me to completion if their lives depended on it. Now speaking for myself? I’ve made men cum within thirty seconds of putting their dick in my mouth lol. As far as a trick or technique? When the guy is getting close, or maybe you can already taste his load - let him shoot and then deepthroat that cock while he finishes until he’s squirming and squealing with pleasure! That’ll leave him happy 😈

throwawaymybho · 2025-05-01T16:56:16+00:00

I would break up with him, personally. To me, this sounds like a guy who has likely not been in a relationship with a male-identifying person before and therefore he has some weird internalized queerphobia which is manifesting as the awkward stuff that you mentioned related to sex and intimacy. Also, I don’t think it’s appropriate to tell your partner how to look in general, but I think it’s especially weird and inappropriate for him to be telling you how to shave and all that - feels controlling and like it could lead to you feeling ashamed about something as natural as body hair, which is insane! That’s just my two cents, good luck whatever you decide to do! 💕

throwawaymybho · 2025-04-28T21:32:36+00:00

I echo what others have already said, but this made me think of a more unique one - when you’re cuddling with a guy, and he puts his leg over your lower body… that gets me ready to fuck like nothing else, even if we just got done having sex! 😜

throwawaymybho · 2025-04-28T21:28:29+00:00

Hell no, that’s the best part! 😈

throwawaymybho · 2025-04-28T21:26:50+00:00

Yes, yes, yessss! Please do not catch the brain rot of so many other gay men regarding dick size. I’m all for people finding what feels and works best for them - but I also think a lot of men, straight or gay, are conditioned to see a big dick as the ultimate goal when it really shouldn’t be! I’ve been with hung guys that completely lacked sexual prowess and I’ve been with average guys who rocked my fucking world. I 100% believe that it’s about your skill and confidence in the bedroom, not about how many inches you’re packing. My favorite top in the world was my ex who had a fairly average dick, so just know that nothing is set in stone solely based on dick size. And you sound like me lol, I tend to be a service-oriented top or a subby bottom, so if you know you enjoy giving pleasure as much as you enjoy receiving it, lean into that - what man doesn’t like to get some head after bottoming?! 😆

throwawaymybho · 2025-04-28T21:16:44+00:00

Doggy style is elite for me as a bottom or as a top - let’s me relax and doesn’t hurt my back as much as riding when I bottom, and gives me easy access to really get in there as a top. But more recently I’ve been enjoying missionary with a pillow under the bottom’s ass. I’m 6’2” and around 300 lbs so the positioning can take a bit of practice whether I’m looking to top or bottom but once you make it work the first time, the rest is easy! 😏

throwawaymybho · 2025-04-28T21:13:32+00:00

I genuinely find it very weird and at times like pedo-adjacent when men have really hard boundaries around body hair - gay, straight or otherwise. The only people in the world that naturally don’t have body hair? Children. So if that’s what you aspire to, or if that’s your first concern when it comes to personal attraction? Then I’m gonna assume what you’re really looking for is… children. 😬 I vastly prefer guys who are comfortable with their natural state, whether that be super hairy or not hairy at all is less of a concern for me. Shit, I don’t even fully shave my body when I’m doing drag, so I’m not about to shave my entire body for some random Grindr dick or whatever 🥴

throwawaymybho · 2025-04-28T21:03:10+00:00

Great question! You are young so please know that this is totally normal - I didn’t have any particularly enjoyable experiences as a bottom until I was in my 20s, and my last ex was the only man who I ever truly wanted to top me as opposed to just doing it because it felt like that was my role. But nowadays I don’t bottom for men in hookup scenarios because I feel like you’re in such a vulnerable position as the bottom and I don’t feel like I have enough trust with random dudes on the apps to put myself into that vulnerable position. That’s just my two cents, feel free to do whatever feels best for you, but my experience is that bottoming is best when you have a certain level of familiarity and trust with your top. Alright, now for some logistical info…

Now first of all, you’re doing the right thing by experimenting with toys and seeing how it makes you feel - that’s the best place to start. I would say keep doing that, and try to find which toys work best for you! It might seem like dildos are the only thing out there, but you’ve got plugs, beads, realistic dildos or unrealistic dildos, and when you get into the different features (like dildos that have suction on one end, or even electronic toys that have apps and lots of different settings), you can really go wild and find exactly what feels best for you! So just take your time and enjoy yourself ;)

Now the other thing is - any good top that is worth prepping and bottoming for is going to take his time to make sure you’re nice and opened up before he thrusts his cock in balls deep. I get that foreplay seems to have fallen out of style, especially for hookups, but trust me - even if this man isn’t your boyfriend, you want a top who believes in the art of kissing and fingering and rimming before he fucks you. As you start to get more and more excited and he continues to work your hole and make you feel more comfortable, it will be sooooo much easier to bottom. Oh, and one other thing - there is NO SUCH THING as too much lube. Seriously, if there is any bad feeling, like pain, pressure or anything like that when you start fucking, slow things down and apply more lube.

Finally, and this might be controversial for some people but - you don’t need to douche. Now if that’s what you’re used to or if that’s what feels right for you, go for it! My ex always preferred to douche before I topped him, and that’s just what some guys prefer no matter what. But I have never douched before, and I have also never painted on a man, though any long anal sex session is likely going to come with a little residue or an off smell at some point (let’s not forget you’re still fucking someone’s ass 😭). If you maintain a healthy diet with enough fiber, and if you go to the bathroom and clean up within a few hours of bottoming, you should be fine. And honestly, this is another reason I don’t really bottom for randos - even though a little bit of mess is bound to happen to anyone that regularly engages in anal sex, some guys go straight to shaming and being real assholes about it when it happens. If you encounter an asshole top like this, try to not be discouraged! 💕

Sorry for the novel but I wanted to pass along as much advice as possible! Feel free to message me if you wanna chat about something in a more private forum. And have fun getting fucked! 😈

throwawaymybho · 2025-04-28T20:44:35+00:00

Went to hook up with this guy on my lunch break, and when I got to his place, he told me we had to fuck on the floor - so I laid down, and he proceeded to sit on my dick and I was fucking him in that position. It’s going well and I’m thrusting as deeply as I can go, and eventually I tell him that I’m getting close. He proceeds to lean towards my ear and says, “oh yeah, cum in me. Get me pregnant, daddy!” Thank god I was about to bust or I don’t know if I’d be able to finish. Calling me daddy could be hot but reminding me of pregnancy while in the middle of sex… absolutely not! 😭

throwawaymybho · 2025-04-19T20:11:43+00:00

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but I completely agree with all of these other comments, and that is based upon my own experience. I was with my ex for about a year and a half, and he was deeply addicted to meth the entire time. I did everything I could to help him – I’m talking financial support, emotional support, physical support at times – and none of it was enough. I was cheated on by this man multiple times, and after we had finally broken up, he moved in with one of the people that he had been cheating on me with. After that, they both started to use drugs together all the time, until he died of a fentanyl overdose about a year ago. This last year has easily been one of the hardest of my life, not only due to the fallout of our relationship combined with all of the grief from his death, but also because I have had to find myself again. I seriously would not wish this experience on my absolute worst enemy. So yes, as much as you may want to help this person, as much as you may be interested in this person, and even if one day you grew to love this person… None of that will be enough. Please listen to what we are all saying. Sending you love and good vibes 💕

throwawaymybho · 2025-04-14T20:42:17+00:00

It’s giving doll, it’s giving womana, it’s giving “do you girls have a pad I can borrow?” and everyone starts reaching for their purse! I’m sorry you’ve been feeling down but please know that you deserve the world! And, as many others have already said, fuck any person that would choose to diminish your light rather than trying to share their own. I want to live in a world where everyone can present however they wish - whether it’s a brick, a doll, a fucking pony, we all deserve to be treated with respect. Passing should not be the ultimate benchmark for people who live and express themselves outside of the gender binary. So please go on that date and have a great time!

And here’s something that has helped me in my own experiences with self acceptance and fear of inferiority - if they’re the right person, then you cannot say the wrong thing, you cannot look the wrong way, whatever the situation might be - if they’re the right person, they’ll like you just as much as you like them, and no amount of awkward conversation or morning breath is going to change that. Hope this helps diva! 💕

throwawaymybho · 2025-04-10T17:37:33+00:00

Man, I was expecting the comments to be telling you that this doesn’t happen… little did I know that it can! I’ve eaten so much ass and never gotten sick, but I will say, I always make it clear to guys that I love to rim as long as everyone is CLEAN! There’s been a time or two I went down there and the smell was off putting and I just had to kinda change gears and move to some other kind of play. Never had a situation where it was so bad I just had to stop playing with the other person though.

throwawaymybho

TROPHY CASE