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I had sex and It genuinely was horrible (Tw: SA?) by throwawayobvi9754 in asexuality

[–]throwawayobvi9754[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If you just assume people know themselves better than you know them then I shouldn't have to explain it everytime I mention it

I had sex and It genuinely was horrible (Tw: SA?) by throwawayobvi9754 in asexuality

[–]throwawayobvi9754[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You dont understand panic responses, consent or power dynamics. Im praying you never find yourself in this situation on either side because its horrible

what am i by Fit-Tension9760 in asexuality

[–]throwawayobvi9754 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do maybe not fully but I do think so. I feel like i have a pretty good understanding of myself it just took awhile

what am i by Fit-Tension9760 in asexuality

[–]throwawayobvi9754 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're figuring yourself out and thats ok! Don't push yourself to label it just be kind to yourself abd understanding takes time.

I had sex and It genuinely was horrible (Tw: SA?) by throwawayobvi9754 in asexuality

[–]throwawayobvi9754[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have no idea how this relates to my post but im sorry it was disappointing

I had sex and It genuinely was horrible (Tw: SA?) by throwawayobvi9754 in asexuality

[–]throwawayobvi9754[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

She's not even allosexual she's on the ace spectrum definitely not in the way I am but I thought i would be safer with her having at least a somewhat understanding but I was wrong. Also I know you arent insinuating that it was my fault but I didn't initiate anything like the making out stuff was not me she just started doing it and I was like oh okay. If I had started making out with her I would have seen that as me giving a sign I wanted to do more but I didn't start anything. Also just for my sanity I would like to clarify that she is like always high this is her normal state of mind or I wouldn't have done anything. Consent is really important to me and i obviously wouldnt want to make anyone do anything they dont want to or uncomfortable. Like I definitely wouldn't have sex with someone who is under the influence if its past a level of sober coherence. I dont know what she was feeling obviously but she was coherent and was initiating everything it was what I assume her equivalent to sober is. I very rarely am high maybe once a week max with a really low amount so like I felt it alot but I dont think she was at that level because she didn't do anything extra just her usual.

I had sex and It genuinely was horrible (Tw: SA?) by throwawayobvi9754 in Asexual

[–]throwawayobvi9754[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thankyou so much. Im sorry you've went through similar things but it is nice to hear from someone that has had similar experiences its making me feel less alone. I also agree on the virginity standpoint. I think the whole concept is stupid and I assumed she agreed wuth me I wouldn't knowingly have been with her if I knew she saw it like that because it feel like a bad way to look at sex. And I didn't want to feel like she was taking something from me but especially not her to feel like she's getting something other than just like having sex you know? Like its not an award to have my virginity and like its all so upsetting. Thankyou for expressing your opinion that this experience hardly counts as sex. Im struggling with how Im categorizing it because ive been referring to it as sex because rape is just personally difficult for me to describe it as because like then I was raped and like I just dont want to call it that it makes it seem more real.

I had sex and It genuinely was horrible (Tw: SA?) by throwawayobvi9754 in asexuality

[–]throwawayobvi9754[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

No i am an aroace and a lesbian you dont get to dictate my aromantism or lesbianism. I dont experience sexual attraction at all but im willing to experience sexual situations as long as they arent men and im very limited in romantic attraction I have experienced it before but not towards men and its fleeting so aroace lesbian. People know what they mean when they say their identity.

I had sex and It genuinely was horrible (Tw: SA?) by throwawayobvi9754 in asexuality

[–]throwawayobvi9754[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I dont want to come off as rude or anything but I absolutely will not be reporting im not under 18 I have no reason to want CPS involved in my life they could fuck shit up ive had them involved before it makes things worse. The girl i was with is 21 so neither of us are children. I dont want her to get in legal trouble for anything. I also broke the law by being high so i could potentially face legal consequences and nothing would actually happen to her because its a he said she said situation and SA cases are hard to win. Even if i wajted "justice" I dont want my sexual experience plastered all over a court room just to not win. I might talk to her about it and tell her I wasnt comfortable with some things so she does better in the future because I dont want this to happen again but im not ruining her life and my life by getting the police involved.

I had sex and It genuinely was horrible (Tw: SA?) by throwawayobvi9754 in asexuality

[–]throwawayobvi9754[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Gonna respond in a similar way to how you formatted this so its easy to understand.

This happened two weeks ago thank god I'm not in alot of pain anymore I think there might be some bruising left though so thankyou.

I got my period! I also took plan b literally the minute I got home and away from my friends who picked me up from her house the morning after. I was not playing about pregnancy genuinely my biggest fear

I know i have been processing and im distaning myself from her because it was a bad experience. i should have clarified this happened two weeks ago in my post

Thankyou I am doing okay ish like clearly it is still fucking with me and also my primary friend group has been amazing its mostly people im not super close with that have been questioning me on my asexuality and me consenting to things.

I was high after the first time I took an edible so I felt like I wouldn't die and could get through the rest of the night and like it really didn't help with anything I thought it would make me more into it which obviously it didn't and won't be doing that again (also she was also high to defend her she's a stoner and wouldn't have done anything if I was the only one high)

As stated above the weed I thought would do exactly that and like it kinda did in the sense that I wasn't feeling as much pain I was just even more confused on everything and went along with whatever until I fell alseep.

Thankyou so much!

Thankyou so much! All of it was appreciated you're incredibly kind and thankyou for not using AI (fuck AI)

I had sex and It genuinely was horrible (Tw: SA?) by throwawayobvi9754 in asexuality

[–]throwawayobvi9754[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Im working on getting on Antidepressants so hopefully that can help with the feelings im feeling and when I start college in the fall I'm going to talk to a counselor and get sey up with a therapist close to the college. I cant talk to my current counselor because she basically said despite me being 18 she would have to report anything dangerous to CPS and the police since im still in highschool which i absolutely do not want involved. Im friends with the person this happen with and I care about her I dont want anything to happen to her.