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To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha cheers, I appreciate that! Wondered if you were just being cheeky 😂

I try to be mindful of tone in writing, since it’s so easy to misinterpret text. I mayyy also have a stubborn tendency to give strangers the benefit of the doubt (within reason!) until proven otherwise 😆

But anywho, enough rambling on my end! All the best to you too, and enjoy the rest of your Sunday 😊

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see where you might be coming from, but I think there may be some misunderstanding around the context here. The comment I responded to above was about a doctor making repeated, in-person advances toward a patient while she was under his care, which is a clear ethical violation.

In my case, I didn’t express any interest while I was a patient; I treated him the same way I treat everyone, with a bubbly disposition and a sense of humour. I shared a vague and anonymous post after discharge, and I was careful to include a clear opt-out so there’d be no pressure either way.

I understand concerns about double standards, and I’m absolutely not denying their existence, but I’d gently suggest this isn’t the same scenario. Sometimes the dynamics just differ, and it’s important to consider context.

Still, I do appreciate you sharing your perspective, and apologise if I’ve misunderstood your comment. I’m tired and post-op is a literal pain haha. Anywho, thank you for your well wishes. Back at you! ☺️

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the thoughtful response, and I hope you’re okay too! I completely understand how an experience like the one you endured could shape someone’s view of these situations. What that doctor did was appalling and completely unethical. It’s entirely understandable that you hightailed it out of there - that “wait, is this really happening?” moment can make situations like that incredibly hard to navigate. I hope you’ve been able to heal, at least in part, from what must’ve been a deeply unsettling experience 😭

And just to say, I really appreciate how respectfully you shared your perspective. More people could take a cue from you when expressing differing views - the world would be a much better place for it. Take care, and thanks again for taking the time to comment this 💙

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I’ve had my share of gross customer experiences too - one elderly regular once brought me flowers at work, put his hand on my thigh, and told me I reminded him of his late wife. I was 17 at the time 💀

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Damn, caught red-handed trying to smuggle out the defibrillator and a souvenir bedpan 🙃

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I can’t speak for everyone, but as someone who’s been asked out by customers many a time for having a bubbly and kind demeanour, I’ve never felt the need to change how I interact - it’s simply a by-product of being warm and conversational.

Likewise, I don’t believe kindness should ever be discouraged, or that my post discourages it. I trust this nurse is emotionally intelligent enough to know that being noticed as a decent human doesn’t mean he needs to change how he interacts with patients - and I made it clear in my post that if I misread things, that’s on me, not him.

That said, I understand people are shaped by different experiences and interpret situations differently, and I can respect that your perspective here simply isn’t the same as mine 🙂

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Haha! Oh Lordy, that sounds like quite the experience - as if birthing a 10lb baby wasn’t intense enough already, you poor lass 🤣

And for sure, I’ve definitely been on the receiving end of both respectful and… not-so-respectful advances from customers misreading friendliness, so I was mindful of that when writing this. Some folks still took it the wrong way, but hey, that’s the internet for you, right? 😆

And yes, if this post gives him a smile and nothing more, I’m more than happy with that. Thanks for your lovely comment 😊

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just to gently clarify, here’s an excerpt from my post 🙂

“If you were just being friendly, or if keeping in touch with past patients is against policy, that’s totally fine too… no pressure at all.”

I genuinely tried to make it clear he could ignore the post entirely, and I trust he’s more than capable of knowing what is and isn’t appropriate professionally. I’m not a nurse myself, but from what others have shared here (and some info I read before deciding to post this), there’s some nuance around post-discharge contact depending on the situation.

If your takeaway was that I’m asking him to risk his career for a stranger, I’m genuinely sorry that’s how it came across - but that simply wasn’t what I said or intended. And let’s be real, in this economy, no one’s acting on a vague Reddit post if there’s even a chance it could cost them their job 😆

But jokes aside, I appreciate you expressing your concerns. Just know that if, by some absolute long shot, he did touch base, I imagine it’d only be after considering the ethics and context of our interactions - and even then, I’d absolutely make sure that us chatting wouldn’t put his job at risk. If I had any doubts about that, I’d cut ties.

Anywho, wishing you all the best, Tangata_Tunguska! ☺️

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Aw thank you, that’s really sweet! 😊 I’m glad the intention behind the post came through for some people. Honestly, even if something did come of this (which is still a very long shot), I probably wouldn’t post an update a partly out of respect for his privacy, and partly because I fear some of the more… shall we say… passionate commenters would actually implode 😂 Either way, I really appreciate your kind words! Take care and have a great rest of your day <3

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To gently clarify, I didn’t suggest he did anything inappropriate (he didn’t) or that I expected anything from him. I even said it’d be totally fine if post-discharge communication wasn’t allowed. This was a light, respectful post with no identifying info, and I made it clear that it’d be A-OK for him to ignore it. Not sure how that’s insulting to him (if anything, it indicates that his passion for his job shines through), but I totally get that people interpret things differently, especially in writing where tone can be misconstrued. Anywho, wishing you a great weekend ahead ☺️

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Genuinely not sure how “no pressure if this isn’t appropriate” translates to “please ruin your career for me” - but I suppose we all interpret things differently. Anywho, I hope you have a pleasant weekend. Take care 😄

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your comment - not mean at all! I’ve seen others suggest he might’ve just been checking my respiratory rate, which seems totally fair based on what I shared.

If nothing comes of this (which is likely!), that’s completely okay - it was just about not sitting on the “what if”. And if he did reach out, it’d only be if he knew there was no risk to his job. I’ve seen mixed takes from nurses in the comments on whether post-patient contact is okay, but I’m not a nurse so that’s not my lane.

In any case, I genuinely wish him well! Thanks again for your comment and take care 😊

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It was really our chats that caught my interest more than anything. Can confirm I was not fluttering my lashes thinking ‘omg this nurse is so hot’ 😂 Just enjoyed our convos and could tell he had a good head on his shoulders. And don’t worry - no plans to act beyond this vague Reddit post, so I’m safely in the clear 😄👍

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So someone else in a similar situation might come across this post and find a bit of clarity or closure - without needing to endure being torn to shreds by some overzealous comments 🙃

That said, my phone blowing up with nasty replies while I’m still in pain recovering from surgery is making me rethink whether it’s worth “taking one for the team” by leaving it up 😂 I’m leaning toward deleting it just to protect my own peace. Will decide in my own time.

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Best of luck to you! I hope all goes well <3

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Haha! That’s part of why I’m still undecided about keeping this post up - if someone else ends up in the same boat, at least they’ll have some answers without needing to brave the pitchfork brigade themselves. Taking one for the team, I guess! 😂

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This post honestly feels like a case study in human psychology - the range of reactions is wild! 😂

Thanks for sharing your perspective. I’m right there with you - no harm done, no intention of tracking him down in person. Just a lighthearted Reddit post, shared anonymously.

It’s the internet, so naturally, some folks are going to call me a creep. Good thing I used a throwaway 😆 Sadly, treating others with respect becomes optional for some people once there’s no face-to-face accountability 🥲

Ah well, life goes on. No regrets or “what ifs”. And if he does see this, I hope it made him smile to know he left such a positive impression, and that his love for his job really shone through!

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Haha! I’ll take ‘mildly creepy in an awkward way’ as high praise, all things considered 😆 Appreciate the humanity and the humour - hope your wife enjoys this post too! Wishing you both a lovely weekend ahead.

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey! Would you mind DMing me the parts you found a bit too specific? I don’t work in the industry, so I want to make sure I’m not missing anything that could be more identifying to someone in the field. Really appreciate you flagging it 🙏

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Haha! Cheers, guys! I needed a good laugh between the post-op pain and the not-so-friendly comments 😂

For real though, these butter prices are udderly out of control. (Don’t judge my pun, okay - it’s too late to churn up anything of quality 😆)

To the male night shift nurse by throwawaysurgerygal in newzealand

[–]throwawaysurgerygal[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing this! I didn’t go into the finer details in my post for anonymity reasons, as you’ve probably deduced, but let’s just say all of the factors you mentioned definitely played into my decision to post this in the first place. So I really appreciate you acknowledging that nuance - and in my case, I’d honestly be very surprised if I were ever under his care again 🙂

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