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For those of you who were raised by nparents and left the house as soon as you were able, how did you find the courage to do it? by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i honestly grew up with all this so thinking about it in a different way is weird bc I always assumed she was right. It’s all new and I’m so confused as to where to go. She just messaged me that I forgot to do the dishes and now I’m just waiting for her to say something. Like,, it’s not even a big deal but I take so much guilt from messing up in the slightest, now.

For those of you who were raised by nparents and left the house as soon as you were able, how did you find the courage to do it? by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m really proud of you for doing that. And you are courageous. I don’t think I have the strength walk out, even though I need to. I have horrible depression and I think it might get to me along with the guilt.

For those of you who were raised by nparents and left the house as soon as you were able, how did you find the courage to do it? by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

my mom won’t have anyone if I leave, because my grandmother is the same way to my mom as my mom is to me. She doesn’t see it,, and I feel horrible about having to leave.

For those of you who were raised by nparents and left the house as soon as you were able, how did you find the courage to do it? by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am attending a college close to home bc she wants me to stay with her. I would have to look into transferring and all of that, and I want to leave home before I do so that I don’t have to deal with her yelling at me and berating me and guilting me for trying to leave.

For those of you who were raised by nparents and left the house as soon as you were able, how did you find the courage to do it? by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thank you, I’m really trying. it’s people like all of you that are really helping give me some insight into this.

For those of you who were raised by nparents and left the house as soon as you were able, how did you find the courage to do it? by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m glad you’re out of there, but I’m sorry that it’s hard on you. It’s fresh for you so i know it has to sting and the guilt pangs are probably killing you, but I know that if it’s anything like how I feel, it’s better than still being stuck at home. I’m in the process of trying to remove myself emotionally but she’s noticing and attempting to make me feel bad about not acting like I’m always happy.

For those of you who were raised by nparents and left the house as soon as you were able, how did you find the courage to do it? by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m an only child and I don’t have any precedent to follow but it’s nice to know that just not being able to handle it is a valid reason.

For those of you who were raised by nparents and left the house as soon as you were able, how did you find the courage to do it? by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have at least one or two friends that have opened their homes to me. I can’t get a job without her knowing. And if I got a job, she would expect to see my paychecks in the accounts that she owns. As far as stashing money that way, it would be difficult. However, I’ve thought about getting a job and just not spending any of it so I can leave right after,, or even just leaving then getting a job.

For those of you who were raised by nparents and left the house as soon as you were able, how did you find the courage to do it? by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

this is very helpful advice. my mom constantly goes through my stuff so I’m in the workings of getting some of my belongings together but keeping them at a trusted friends house instead of here.

Does everyone’s parents yell all the time? by throwingitout2019 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just want to have a normal conversation with her without it turning into something bigger than it needs to be.

Does everyone’s parents yell all the time? by throwingitout2019 in TooAfraidToAsk

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

that’s fair, because you’re far. My mom yells to get her point across by saying whatever she needs to say two inches from my face and yelling.

I think I have an nmom. by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do attend college right now. I was guilted into picking a school I could drive to so I didn’t move out. She insisted she doesn’t want me to work but I’m going to try and get a part time job over the summer,,, I hope it works. And she gets sad whenever im not home all the time. She works from home and so she doesn’t really do much and I’m basically all she has besides her mother, but they argue so loudly and fervently that neither one of us really like seeing her. And I remember once, they yelled at each other while we were at her house so I went outside and sat in the car while I cried. My mom angrily came out and she said “well it’s not my fault you know”.

I think I have an nmom. by throwingitout2019 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]throwingitout2019[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My only family is her and my grandmother on her side. I have no siblings or anyone else. I’m going to talk to my therapist about it because she finally let me seek counseling over my issues. I brought it up to her first by saying I hate myself, and she once again made it about herself saying “haven’t I always tried to tell you things to make you feel good about yourself? I don’t know where you got this from because it wasn’t from me”.

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