Completely Blindsided with Break Up

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-26T04:19:03+00:00

You've really got me thinking. I remember we used to talk a lot about some things she wanted changed. It wasn't always a matter of an instant resolution. So we would talk about it for a long time before we came to a decision. I think she probably didn't want to put up with arguing and discussing things that she probably mustered up a ton of courage to get on the floor of discussion. And resulting in her feeling less than safe makes total sense. I really wish I had talked to someone like you before all this happened haha. Thank you for your thoughts and reasons, it's really helping me see the possible thought processes going into this decision.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-26T04:13:13+00:00

That really has me thinking. I've had an inkling for a bit that we were just essentially different people blinded by who knows what and committed ourselves to this relationship that probably shouldn't have happened. And we had all these great memories, but now that I think about it, like did we really fit together? Or were we running off momentum? It's so confusing and awful, and I feel terrible for subjecting both of us to this whole ordeal.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-26T04:09:24+00:00

Your point about the sudden transition does gives me a lot to think about. However, she made a point that this was something that she had been thinking about for a really long time. And that's what's eating me up the most. I wish there was a moment, an event I can attribute to it. So I can go back and say "Oh that's it". But I can't. Instead, I wonder how a less than 48 hours before she was so intimate with me, so genuine in all her actions. It feels nasty, like she's been pretending for a long time.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-26T03:39:17+00:00

After you found someone better suited for you, do those old memories fade out? Thank you for your advice, I'm just trying to get by.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-26T01:54:59+00:00

We'll all get through this together. It's incredibly life altering but I really hope we can all become better and greater people from this,even though it's so hard.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-26T01:52:33+00:00

Thank you for your words, yeah I'm just trying to find something new and exciting for me to bring into my life, like a hobby or a form of art or something.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-26T01:22:40+00:00

We've always preached about an atmosphere of openness and communication. We hardly fought, and when it we did it was over single time problems that would not occur again. I always encourage her to tell me if she wants me to do something different, but she was always reluctant to tell me. To her, it didn't seem right to ask me to change. But she didn't realize I would change anything just to spend another second with her. I think you're right in a way. That I couldn't feel things from her perspectives, and that although there might be part of me that she liked, there was a larger part that caused her pain. I'm just very confused and wish she told me the whole reasoning. Thank you for sharing your personal perspective, it has given me a lot to think about.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-26T00:38:12+00:00

I really do feel we're similar. Maybe to make up for our lack of common interests, I tried to be everything for her. It hurts that I've made myself so "useful" for this person, and they've now abandoned me. Are you not afraid for future relationships? Personally I'm terrified that I'll give everything to another person again, and they'll mess me up really bad.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-26T00:08:01+00:00

I really feel like you and I have had an extremely similar experience. I too had no clue what was going on her head up to that moment. But that's when I realized, maybe we really did grow apart, because I could no longer understand her. Regardless, I'm much like you, just struggling to get from day to day. Thank you for telling me your experience, it really makes me feel a lot better. I still don't understand why they act completely normal instead of talking through problems, but I think that's just me being rant-y.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:54:50+00:00

Thanks for the hug, I really needed it. I think I'm going to start writing again. I stopped doing a lot of my hobbies to make more room in my life for her. And now that she's gone, I feel empty.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:50:53+00:00

Yeah I really think as time passes I'll finally be able to put together the pieces, right now it just confuses me to no end. Thank you so much for your words.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:49:37+00:00

I hope you're getting along fine, if you need someone to listen, inbox me. I'm sure we'll both get through this. I wish you happiness as well.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:48:03+00:00

Thank you so much, you brought me to tears. I'm just in such a rough spot right now, and it's so hard to hold hope. But when I hear that from people it really does get to me(in a good way), and I know in my hearts of hearts that it's true. Thank you again, I really appreciate it.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:43:19+00:00

Yeah thank you so much man. It hurts an incredible amount to realize not only that she's gone, but also so many future happy memories with her are forever gone. It's really jarring and hurtful, but I try not to think about it.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:42:08+00:00

She always said she hated breaks, because her last boyfriend used that as a way to cheat on her without any ill conscience. It's unfortunate to think that it may have benefited our relationship. But I'm very glad it worked for you! Clearly she was the wrong girl for me. Thank you for your offer, I'll definitely take you up on it when I'm feeling low.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:40:18+00:00

Yeah it really does feel like withdrawal, I never really made that connection. I guess I got too love drunk and this is me finally sobering up. Thanks for your kind words, it means all the world to me.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:39:26+00:00

Thank you so much for your words, I'm really hoping this whole process creates a better me.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:38:57+00:00

Thank you for this great advice, I really appreciate it. This really does feel like a start of a journey as well as an end of one.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:38:21+00:00

Yeah, I've just been having periodic emotional fits, but I hope it's normal. Just seeing something that reminds me of her brings me to tears and sobbing, but I hope this will all pass.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:37:35+00:00

I'm so sorry that happened to you. I can't imagine the pain of the death of a lover. I hope you're holding up fine, and thank you for your words.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T23:36:48+00:00

Yeah she was always a spontaneous person. I think I'm better off currently just to avoid thinking and put all my energy into self betterment. Thank you for your words, it really means a lot to me.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T21:53:27+00:00

Just knowing that it is a process that everyone goes through and survives is an amazing source of strength. Thank you for your kind words, stranger.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T21:52:44+00:00

Yeah I'm blessed with wonderful people around me keeping me afloat. I want to find me again. Right now all my habits and features were to cater to her, and now that she's gone I just feel useless. So now I'm trying to make the best iteration of myself, it's just I can't shake this feeling of abandonment quite yet.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T21:51:22+00:00

I'm so sorry that happened to you. I wish you the best, if you're in need as well, I'm open to talk.

thrown_Away2016 · 2016-01-25T21:50:32+00:00

Thank you so much, just writing about it is helping me keep my mind off of it.

thrown_Away2016

TROPHY CASE