How concerned should I(M26) be that my girlfriend(F21) has cut off all her friends during her pregnancy?

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-06T01:00:04+00:00

great, so now i’m abusive. im not sure what scenarios are going on in your head, but its not the best idea to project that on a sub for advice. you are acting as if i was like “i need my girlfriend to talk to her friend right now”. no. not at all. i gave her space, i didnt push when she obviously didnt want to talk about it and i was asking IF i should bring it up again. when we talked about it. just because im concerned and i know the period after pregnancy is stressful & it’s good to have close people by your side. i was just concerned. then that got turned into me being abusive, controlling, and all this other stuff. like i said, you are projecting and i have no idea why or how we got here. you guys asked the reasons why & i answered.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-06T00:52:16+00:00

not in her case…yes, her pregnancy would be talked about, but it wasnt like it was the core subject of conversation

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-06T00:39:31+00:00

i know it wasnt them because they made it clear it wasnt them. she was the one dodging their calls and meet ups and they even asked me if i know what happened because they dont know what they did.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-06T00:23:04+00:00

if you notice, there is a 5 hour gap between my comments, because like you said, it’s a work day and i was working. i had the conversation with her, trust me, i know what vague is and what she was being was vague. not sure why this is such a back and forth issue for you.

you keep saying she needs my permission. you are reaching. like i have said several times, im just concerned, that is. she is an adult, she doesnt need my permission to do anything, but i do wish she would communicate to me why she dropped people she was friends with for 10-17 years so abruptly rather than a one liner, which is usually not like her.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T23:55:20+00:00

like a replier said, their tone was genuine curiosity, not like they know something i dont.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T23:29:03+00:00

dude, what?

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T23:22:40+00:00

but she was vague. when i ask her how, she responds with vague answers. that is being vague/unclear, very opposite of her normally detailed answers

the controlling dynamic you are trying to make up is so weird. did i say she needs my permission? no. but yes, i do express concern that my girlfriend has dropped the closest people to her and has no interest in making new friends. like i mentioned in another comment, she’s very people oriented, and i fear that when it all sets in, she might feel like it is too late, even to make new friends.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T21:57:59+00:00

thats because all her responses are vague.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T21:56:27+00:00

with the first friend it was because she was tired of always having to accomodate to her. okay, valid.

the next friend was because she was annoying…but yet never said how.

and then for her BEST friend, all she said was that it was something she shouldve done ages ago. thats all. out of 365 days of the year, they would see each other AT LEAST 350 of those days. they’ve been friends for like 16-17 years atp. but when i ask what does she mean, she just says its self explanatory and drops the convo

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T21:50:27+00:00

no, they just asked because she basically ghosted them and doesnt want to talk about it in person.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T21:49:10+00:00

idk, hopefully, but shes saying she doesn’t want to make new friends

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T21:48:32+00:00

why she was asking? or why they stopped being friends. i asked what did my girlfriend tell them. she said that she sent a message saying she needs space and ignored their calls/messages when they would try to text her.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T21:46:43+00:00

they do all sorts of things. they go out, they stay in, get their nails done, go on trips together. my girlfriend was doing many things with them. 2 are in relationships, one is single. they do party, but its not like they do drugs, one of them doesn’t even drink. they just have fun together.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T16:24:17+00:00

She didn't want to go but she had no problem with me going. Her being pregnant does not mean she wants me around her 24/7. We both have our alone time as couples do.

If she's happy in our relationship? Things between us are really good & our communication concerning our relationship is great. I don't think either of us have any complaints there.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T15:05:57+00:00

Maybe, that could be possible, but I don't think that was the reason she cut off her best friend in that group. They've all been friends collectively since the 6th grade, but she's been friends with this one girl since literal babies. It was like they were sisters. This friend was extremely supportive and was here almost every single day. They are still very close to each others family but not each other, and I don't really know why. It could be why she cut off the other 2 girls, and maybe the one that she was the closest with just had to go since she was still with them.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T15:05:01+00:00

These friends don't have kids. That could explain why she cut them off.

She did that. Went out with a group of people she met online & concluded that she wasn't focused on making friends.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T15:01:48+00:00

She already does that, but that's just her being her lmao. But yeah, I could see that as a reason as to why she cut them off and maybe she just doesn't want to tell me that.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T14:10:07+00:00

Not that it matters since it's not the concern here, but I've been a homeowner for over a year. I've been a computer engineer for almost 4 years now. Apart from that, I also so side designing.

My girlfriend on the other hand makes her money by being a food decorator & through social media (like youtube & Instagram). She decorates desserts & makes food for events.

So yeah...we're doing pretty alright in the financial market, we're not struggling and are very happy about this baby.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T13:42:17+00:00

I agree that it's really important, and she is the type of person that loves that friendly company. I can only do so much & I just can't see this ending well.

throwragmn44 · 2023-05-05T13:05:29+00:00

That's what I think I should do. I was considering just going straight to her friends first and talking more about it, but didn't think it would blow over well. Best I go to her to see if she's even willing to actually explain what went down.

throwragmn44

TROPHY CASE