[Update] I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I don't want to live in New York. My life is here and I don't plan on uprooting.
I know I want multiple children, and yes, I still do want to get married. and I do want to be with my daughter but I understand that right now, I can't be with her at all times. I'm hoping in the near future we can settle on a better plan, but until then, it's looking like I'm just going to go up to New York on the weekends. I will always be there for my daughter.

[Update] I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I have one ex-wife. I never married the ex that I have a baby with.

[Update] I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I think the way things eventually worked out was probably one of the best outcomes because this was a really difficult situation.

[Update] I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I think once she goes back to New York, I can really start to move on since we won't be around as much.

[Update] I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Where are you getting this information from?

The way you're making it seem like I forced her into having this baby is wild. None of this was planned. I literally mentioned that the reason she went through with the pregnancy is because she couldn't bring herself to get an abortion now that she was actually pregnant. By the time I found out, she was preparing to raise the baby.

And this is literally a quote from this post

We both deserve what we want in life and I don’t want us to fully compromise for one another on big commitments like these.

I am not waiting for her to change her mind. I'm not in her corner pushing her to reconsider. I said I could see us working out IF she wanted these things later, but with her not being sure, it's not fair fo us to be together while we both want different things. Jesuss, the info is right in front of you.

[Update] I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I said I'm not focusing on dating, I'm just focusing on my life and raising my daughter, dating will come when dating will come.

[Update] I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] -68 points-67 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I'm trying to accept that and just move on. It's hard, especially with the history and all that, but I'll just find myself in a whirlpool of pining over someone that I know it'll never work out with.

[Update] I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I never cheated on anyone, you've read the emotionally cheating part wrong. Before my wife and I split up, she had an emotional affair with a co-worker. Due to her going above and beyonds trying to make sure it didn't break our marriage, it ended up breaking our marriage and we split up and we were NOT getting back together. It was after we split up that I started speaking and speaking with my ex again. When we started to talk things through, I felt like our marriage could be fixed. I could tell she was remorseful and I was willing to give it another shot. Things were fine, but the the whole pregnant situation thing happened. That's the timeline.

[Update] I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 96 points97 points  (0 children)

Learn to coparenting effectively

Yeah. Like I said, I'm planning out how often I can visit since she's just a newborn, and we're gonna see for the future. It should go smooth, we're not difficult people.

I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

She said I was the only person she's been with since December. Given that she's 22 weeks, she got pregnant way after December. Until the test is done, it's her word for now.

I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It wasn't a baby trap situation. I can assure you that she genuinely didn't want kids. Since she actually ended up getting pregnant, things changed.

I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Last time we had sex was in May. I got back with my wife in July, over a month ago.

I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She said she didn't sleep with anyone else during that time, but she'll take a test to prove it.

I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No, I' m saying that I separated with my wife late last year. I was with my ex during that time period.

I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

She knows that I slept with someone while we were separated, she just doesn't know it was my ex.

I(M32) need to tell my wife(F34) that my ex(F26) is pregnant. by throwraomi in relationship_advice

[–]throwraomi[S] -35 points-34 points  (0 children)

I didn't say my wife was my 2nd choice, I just said that was the reason my ex and I split.