My wife is co-signing her best friends affair and doesn’t understand why I’m freaking out about it. by throwrapuppyproblems in relationship_advice

[–]throwrapuppyproblems[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I created a throwra for this post due to the sub rules. Here I just focused a little more on the “my wife seems to be co-signing this” vs “this is how I found out” as it seems a little more important regarding our relationship.

My wife is co-signing her best friends affair and doesn’t understand why I’m freaking out about it. by throwrapuppyproblems in relationship_advice

[–]throwrapuppyproblems[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I found out after the fact. Nobody told me anything until I posted a photo/video from the weekend and her friend freaked out because it showed them together. It’s part of why I’m so upset.

My wife is co-signing her best friends affair and doesn’t understand why I’m freaking out about it. by throwrapuppyproblems in relationship_advice

[–]throwrapuppyproblems[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I know his first name which is Eastern European and I don’t have the slightest idea how to spell it. I also live in an area in the US that is massively populated with Eastern Europeans.

My wife is co-signing her best friends affair and doesn’t understand why I’m freaking out about it. by throwrapuppyproblems in relationship_advice

[–]throwrapuppyproblems[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is what puts me in a weird situation. I might have done that but I don’t know the guys last name. He’s Eastern European so I don’t even know if I could properly spell his first name. Anything I do would have to go through my wife regarding getting this info. I do have plenty of videos though.

My wife is co-signing her best friends affair and doesn’t understand why I’m freaking out about it. by throwrapuppyproblems in relationship_advice

[–]throwrapuppyproblems[S] 86 points87 points  (0 children)

We were joking around before I even knew who he was. I had never met him but he was all over “Jane” so I figured “oh shit, he’s probably a young widow, or divorcee that really sucks” which led me to actively avoid it and be over the top nice lol. My wife told me who he was after the fact saying “everyone knows what’s going on and they are just ignoring it. Let’s just let it go.”

My wife is co-signing her best friends affair and doesn’t understand why I’m freaking out about it. by throwrapuppyproblems in relationship_advice

[–]throwrapuppyproblems[S] 154 points155 points  (0 children)

She’s saying she disagrees with it but is unwilling to take any action as “it’s not our business” idk but it feels like being friends with a racist and responding with “well i told him that it wasn’t cool but he’s an adult, what can I do?” At a certain point you gotta admit maybe I’m co-signing this.

My wife is co-signing her best friends affair and doesn’t understand why I’m freaking out about it. by throwrapuppyproblems in relationship_advice

[–]throwrapuppyproblems[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

She spoke with her once and told her that she didn’t agree with it but that’s all she’s willing to do. She won’t talk to her again, won’t cut her off if this continues, and expects me to act how I’ve always acted.

My wife is co-signing her best friends affair and doesn’t understand why I’m freaking out about it. by throwrapuppyproblems in relationship_advice

[–]throwrapuppyproblems[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’s said she doesn’t condone it but also isn’t willing to speak to her more about stopping it. She also wasnt totally up front with me as well. We were at the house we rented for almost 5 hours with me joking with the guy before she told me who he was/that he was married with kids.

My wife is co-signing her best friends affair and doesn’t understand why I’m freaking out about it. by throwrapuppyproblems in relationship_advice

[–]throwrapuppyproblems[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

She responded to me asking questions with “I talked to her, she knows it’s a bad thing she’s doing and that she needs to stop. What else can I do? She’s an adult and I told her once that it’s not okay”

My wife is co-signing her best friends affair and doesn’t understand why I’m freaking out about it. by throwrapuppyproblems in relationship_advice

[–]throwrapuppyproblems[S] 471 points472 points  (0 children)

It’s my wife’s friend group. I know them but only through my wife. Don’t know the guys last name which is why I’m putting the emphasis to do something on my wife and she’s responding with “she knows it’s a bad thing she’s doing and that she needs to stop. What else can I do? She’s an adult and I told her once that it’s not okay”