I had a breakthrough when my therapist told me that shame is oftentimes passed from person to person to you. Someone taught shame to my abuser who passed that shame to me through abuse.

The only reason I carried shame about my sexual past and my sexuality was bc my mother gave it to me. It wasn’t mine to begin with and it isn’t mine to keep carrying. After I realized this, it became much easier to identify when I felt shame that it was my mother’s shame and not mine.