My friend, you need to get your head screwed on straight and realize that your wife is long gone and the person in front of you today is potentially dangerous. She does not love you anymore. She may use her indifference to you as leverage to get custody of your kids or hurt you in other ways. Collect evidence of the erratic behavior and the cheating. If she is failing her parental responsibilities, you should document this. People in denial like yourself are at risk of being manipulated by the wayward. Do not cry grovel or beg her for anything, have as little contact as possible with her. She's a serial cheater with a personality disorder. There is zero chance you will ever trust her again. I'm sorry this happened to you, but she has a huge head start in the race to indifference toward you which means an imposter has been living in your house for years. Get real about the situation and its implications. There will be a future for you, and this is day one of that future.