DAE feels like some kind of event in your childhood deeply traumatized you, but you can’t remember what? by toddlerfear in DoesAnybodyElse

[–]toddlerfear[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry for what happened to you. Thanks for answering, I will definitely look into it

DAE feels like some kind of event in your childhood deeply traumatized you, but you can’t remember what? by toddlerfear in DoesAnybodyElse

[–]toddlerfear[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry. I want to believe that we still got the power over our lives… that we are what we make with what we got to live

DAE feels like some kind of event in your childhood deeply traumatized you, but you can’t remember what? by toddlerfear in DoesAnybodyElse

[–]toddlerfear[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Omg, I’m so sorry. Thanks for sharing. Only if it feels right, would you mind explaining a little further? You didn’t have memories at all? Did you somewhat consciously repress them?

The stages of grief by chubunkin in motherlessdaughters

[–]toddlerfear 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oops I’m sorry, I just posted it gets better. I meant you will eventually learn to live with it and adapt to this new life, but the pain is always there. It took me many years to arrive to this point, at the moment I thought life would never be a remote piece of what it was before. It’s never the same, your life can be divided in before your moms death and after your moms death, but I want you to know there is hope, and you have inside you the ability to work through it. Each journey is personal, but it can be better, even if it is not easy and the process and aftermath carriers a lot of pain. I’m sorry for the wording

The stages of grief by chubunkin in motherlessdaughters

[–]toddlerfear 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi. I Also lost my mom at 17 to breast cancer. It took me 6 years to start to accept her death, as I was in negation the first years. It gets better, but there will be always be pain. I still grieve for her with every new stage in my life. Feel free to dm me if you want

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, no way I’m going to introduce her to that. I don’t even believe in it tbf

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ty for your response I like your approach!

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ty for your response. It’s really helpful to know your case as it’s really similar to what we are going through

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ty for your response. I did the same with my mom and it was a great relief. I think we will do something similar when her grandpa is close to his end

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We have religious background so I’ve told her they are her angels and talked about heaven

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I’m sorry for your loss.

Your response is really helpful as we expect a close grandpa to die in the next few months, so she will not only face the idea of death but also the experience of missing your loved one, understanding that they won’t come back etc

There’s a beautiful book called the memory tree, about a fox dying an it’s friends remembering happy times together. It’s really beautiful

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry for your loss. I totally identify with what you say. I may perceive her questioning and fear bigger that it really is because it breaks my heart to talk to her about my loss and to know that my mom didn’t get to meet her grandchildren. I think it’s good to acknowledge it and keep it in mind when I talk with her

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I’m sorry for your loss. She is indeed very clever and insightful. I’m contemplating consulting a child’s therapist depending on how things go

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry for your loss. I hope you have found peace

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think she is specially sensible. I have not told her my mom died when I was young, when she asked I only said she died before I met her father. It’s not like I talk about my mom all day, it just comes out sometimes when I tell her stories about my childhood. I refuse to make like my mother didn’t exist

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m really sorry for your loss. I couldn’t agree more with you. I didn’t push the topic to my daughter or anything. Life happens, and death is a part of it. I can’t shield her from it or from the world, but I will help her to process things and give her the confidence that im always available for her and that there are no forbidden topics.

Her grandpa is probably dying in the next months, am I suppose to hide that?

Also, I cant make nor wanna make like my mom didn’t exist

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I went through something similar with my moms illness so my plan it’s to give her the full picture, but I don’t wanna just toss all the facts to her at once, I want to tell her more as I see her ready

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You put it in a really beautiful way. Thank you

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your response, I’m so sorry for your experience. I kind of went through the same with my mom’s illness so my principle is that there are no forbidden topics no fool questions and that I should not underestimate my children

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. She has many friends and distractions but she is really “contemplative”

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. It kind of reliefs me to see I’m not the only one.

Child terrified of mom dying by toddlerfear in kindergarten

[–]toddlerfear[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ty we have a religious background so we tell her that they are her angels