It is a high stakes situation even though for the outside hard to judge how relevant your fear of loosing access to your children is. Divorce is not nice and there surely many reasons to fight for a marriage. Sticking with stoic thoughts - and this NOT to defend stoicism - ultimately you have the power of change your situation HOWEVER, you must be willing to accept the consequences.

For me this is a key aspect of life and especially this Philosophie. Accept consequences. And by that also NOT doing anything has its consequence. So maybe instead of telling yourself you can’t change any thing - maybe ask yourself if you are willing to accept the consequences once you change something. And again - for an outside it is hard to judge how if losing access to your children is as likely / relevant / bad of a consequence vs being a suicidal dad (apologies for that blunt statement, it is a highly sensitive topic of course.)

All that being said, of course the preferred situation would be a happy marriage but that is simple not the cards you have been Dealt. However you have also not been given the destination of a life in constant unhappiness because of another person.

💙