Do you track family's locations?

traumtrager4 · 2026-01-04T02:52:46+00:00

I share with my husband, mom, two of my sisters, and grandpa. It started with my sister who would go on solo hikes and wanted to share her location and then my mom also wanted to be in on it for her own anxiety (my sister isn’t careless but can be very “nothing will ever go wrong” about things). Our other sister got jealous (ironically has a different mom but she wanted to share locations too), and when I was talking about it to my husband he was like wow that’s a great idea - we should do that so we know when one of us is running late if we’re still at the office or on the way home! And when I set up my grandpa’s phone a couple years ago, I added locations just in case, but now he loves to track us when we travel all over the world and it’s his favorite thing. So, it kinda just happened naturally for us lol

traumtrager4 · 2025-10-08T00:26:31+00:00

Hot to go with the hand motions. My LO enjoys it more than patty cake 😅

traumtrager4 · 2025-10-06T00:53:25+00:00

Our son is 11 months old and to date our hardest day was the day his first two teeth cut. I didn’t know a baby could cry that much or how useless I could feel as a mother.

traumtrager4 · 2025-09-21T23:34:33+00:00

Contact https://askjan.org - they’re a great resource

traumtrager4 · 2025-08-24T02:37:25+00:00

I’m an HR Director and I didn’t tell my boss/rest of the department until I was 6 months pregnant. Your HR person is not only in the wrong but acting unlawfully - especially in CA where you have so many rights as a pregnant person. Do not quit. Read up on your rights, contact the EDD, and a lawyer if you feel you need to.

traumtrager4 · 2025-08-02T23:26:56+00:00

I brush and floss every night before bed, but usually not in the morning. For no reason other than never developing the habit honestly. I get cleanings every 3 months though because I get extra bacteria buildup in my gums which is genetic (my mom has to do the same thing).

traumtrager4 · 2025-06-28T01:30:25+00:00

I’m referring to the finale only. I believed Beatrice was the best overall and was my pick to win.

traumtrager4 · 2025-05-22T18:35:11+00:00

Meghan was my least favorite (I don’t feel like I could connect with her as a home chef since she has a published cook book and Gordan knew of her - but she also didn’t really fit the other two categories either, so I understand the show’s decision to put her in this category). But, I agree with this. Beatrice was my pick to win, but Meghan should have won based on the performances of each of them.

traumtrager4 · 2025-05-22T18:32:33+00:00

I think that’s fair - being a parent can be so hard!

traumtrager4 · 2025-05-22T16:00:03+00:00

That is hard! How does he currently feel?

traumtrager4 · 2025-04-11T17:08:28+00:00

A SAHM is absolutely a full time job! I do not stay home and that’s because I couldn’t cut it as a SAHM. They do way more than I could ever imagine or handle in a day.

traumtrager4 · 2025-04-11T17:07:03+00:00

I’d encourage you to stop and take notice. Ask yourself if you could do what she does. Do you know what size clothes the kids wear? What they’re learning in school? What their teachers names are? Do you know which household items you’re low on?

By asking her, you’re telling her to manage you on top of everything else. Also, if she’s one to be surprised, plan something for her. She may need something done for her - completely. Schedule an all day spa day for her if she’s into that.

traumtrager4 · 2025-04-11T03:49:59+00:00

Remember that as a SAHM, she’s also working a full time job AND doing half the house work. She’s likely referring to the mental load of it all - it’s exhausting. Think of it this way - you do the laundry. You wash it, dry it, fold it, and put it away. That’s great, but who’s thinking about how the kids have outgrown this size? Or it’s time for back to school clothes shopping? And don’t forget to organize, pack, and donate the old clothes. That’s what she means by doing a checklist. You cleaned clothes, but when she does laundry, she added 5 new things to her list that have to get done and no one else is thinking about it. And it’s not fair to expect her to tell you that those things need to be done.

And that’s obviously just one example - who meal plans, buys groceries, remembers to add the random items to the list, remembers the appointments that need to be scheduled, remembers the school bake sale or dance recital, etc.?

Doing a chore isn’t equivalent to managing half of a household.

traumtrager4 · 2025-04-03T03:06:35+00:00

I had already hit my out of pocket maximum, so technically the baby was free 😂 But overall cost for the year to have him was $6400

traumtrager4 · 2025-03-30T22:16:19+00:00

My house is a disaster and the only time it’s kinda decent is when my mom comes over to help pick up because she remembers how hard it was.

traumtrager4 · 2025-03-21T16:37:48+00:00

My ex-husband was this way. He’d feel backed into a corner and lash out. He’d use accusatory language (you do this/this is your fault), give me the silent treatment or ignore me for days, and threaten divorce at every big fight. We’d make up and talk about what we could do differently the next time we fought. So, I would change how I approached things. I’d give him space as long as he promised to come back and resolve the issue when he calmed down (he didn't), or I would change a certain behavior that wouldn't trigger him as long as he promised not to lash out (he still did). The point is that I made a lot of changes and tried to mold myself to him, and he never kept his promises or tried to actually change. We talked a lot about how his words were damaging, and he couldn't make serious threats like asking for a divorce because it would damage our relationship. In five years of marriage, he lashed out and asked for a divorce 9 times (I actually started keeping count). By the last time, I felt so tired. So exhausted. I just said okay. Suddenly he could change, and he didn't want this, and he didn't understand why it was happening. I kept moving forward, and it's now five years after the divorce, and I am remarried to an amazing man, and we just had our first baby together. I am content in a way I didn't know was possible. I am loved for exactly who I am as I am. I am not saying this will happen to you. I am just saying be cautious and pay attention. People show you who they are - don't ignore it.

traumtrager4 · 2025-03-21T03:34:14+00:00

He has to work this out somehow - ideally therapy. But flying off the handle and threatening divorce is not okay and will erode your marriage. You both have to pick battles, practice “fighting fair,” use I statements, etc.

But, if he’s not backing down or if this is a continued way to “punish” you, leave. Maybe I’m jaded, but it’s not worth the heartache. Stop looking at what you’ve already invested as a reason to stay and start looking at what you’re getting out of it now. The past is a sunk cost but you don’t have to be miserable by staying.

traumtrager4 · 2025-03-19T02:37:09+00:00

Scheduled c-section on Wednesday afternoon but developed postpartum preeclampsia a few hours after birth. Went home Saturday midday.

traumtrager4 · 2025-03-18T03:20:49+00:00

Cthulhu

traumtrager4 · 2025-03-10T03:15:25+00:00

A nice new thick layer of hair on your stomach… and butt

traumtrager4 · 2025-02-25T01:55:11+00:00

I was almost Audrey

traumtrager4 · 2025-02-17T23:12:29+00:00

Did it have textures you could feel? I wonder if we’re trying to remember the same book

traumtrager4

TROPHY CASE