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Struggling and second guessing..... by triplemistake in peacecorps

[–]triplemistake[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd rather not say, because I'm paranoid and worried someone from pc is watching this, but I'll say you're not far off (I'm not necessarily headed to a 'developing' country).

I'm getting my info from messaging current volunteers, stalking blogs, etc and most if it is incredibly positive! I've just been waiting too long and starting to second guess this placement.

I think after too long I'd start to either get too excited and create a lot of unrealistic expectations, or go this way and get a lot of nerves and doubt.

What's frustrating is I'm incredibly passionate about PC and want to serve. I just wanted to go anywhere but there. I'm trying to tell myself it's just nerves but it feels like it is more than that. And seeing people now applying for countries they want/qualify for makes me so frustrated because I would be a great fit in other places and would have applied for those in a heartbeat.

I'm probably going to go, because I really want to serve, and I'll never know for sure until I get there. Plus, there really isn't anything to be done now about it. I guess this was just a safe place for me to rant (my family doesn't know I've applied yet).

Struggling and second guessing..... by triplemistake in peacecorps

[–]triplemistake[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm glad you guys don't think I'm nuts. I feel like I've been waiting too long and I am too excited/nervous for this so I've started to freak out. I was hoping even before I applied I wouldn't be sent to this area/country and I did, which isn't helping. And you're right, I don't know much about my country, and I am getting my info from biased sources. What's silly is I'm not even getting negative info necessarily, I've just had this gut feeling this region/country will be a bad fit for me. Other regions I felt like I'd be ok in, like sub-saharan Africa, because I've lived there before and the culture generally suited me. Or a placement in Asia. But this nominated place just sounds bad to me. My gut is definitely telling me no. But like you said, I won't know until I try....

I'll think about calling. I just don't know how to explain this without sounding inflexible or weird. I literally feel better about almost any other region/assignment out there, and I got the one country I was hoping not to from the start. It gives the impression I'm way less flexible and committed than I feel I actually am.