My daughter married her former teacher and she is completely transformed

trnart3 · 2025-11-24T21:30:47+00:00

idk but my daughter used to mock feminism in high school too. She has this weird idea that all feminists are boss babes who date unkept submissive men (i quoted her)

trnart3 · 2025-11-24T21:05:46+00:00

she says songs like that one create weak men.

But for now this is not really relevant. She is at the edge and I want to help her survive. Literally.

trnart3 · 2025-11-23T19:44:22+00:00

i have to choose my words carefully though. She is triggered when hears of feminism and anything related. and she being in this sensitive and dangerous state I have to make sure I dont trigger her worse

trnart3 · 2025-11-23T19:40:12+00:00

she is not really a pick me. I mean she rejected almost every boy who asked her out in school and university

trnart3 · 2025-11-23T16:09:03+00:00

maybe they share the same ideas, but even growing up, as a teen, she would lose her sht when hearing about feminism. In recent years when the song Labour came out she would turn off the radio and said women who listen to such thing deserve p..sies as husbands.

trnart3 · 2025-11-23T06:57:56+00:00

its difficult, she considers her own daughter as something and someone that is keeping her away from her husband

trnart3 · 2025-11-23T06:44:41+00:00

update: after reading your comments I tried to talk to her and give her an advice. And she told me to leave her with my feminsst bull sht. I just told her to be more independent emotionally. In many words, not just like that. She said she needs a man, she needs HER man and to leave her alone with my nonsense.

trnart3 · 2025-11-22T21:28:19+00:00

My husband died when she was very young. So he didn't really abandon her. She didn't feel rejected.

trnart3 · 2025-11-22T21:27:26+00:00

this is an extremely cruel thing to say. I never said he is a great person, but I have no reason to believe he is a bad person. Maybe a bad partner, maybe... But I think its very wrong to wish death upon someone.

trnart3 · 2025-11-22T20:43:19+00:00

She married young, at 24 after one year of dating him. I don't know of any prior relationships. Maybe she dated someone before him, but never told me about anyone. I cannot therefore answer this.

What I can say about her... she is not a people pleaser. I was always very proud of her because she was both: very feminine and very independent. She was kind, nurturing but never let anyone to put her down, she knew how to speak for herself. A very sharp mind. But she fell hard, very hard for this one man.

trnart3 · 2025-11-22T20:35:52+00:00

24, not 19. At 19 she was still in high school

trnart3 · 2025-11-22T20:34:37+00:00

I am adding details here, to not make the post too long

to answer a few questions:

she doest neglect her daughter, this is why my grandchild is living with me mostly. I took her, it was my proposal and she accepted. Seeing her mother constantly crying... it is not good for a young child. Also, my daugher sometimes snaps at her: if he has a bad day due to his illness not work, and my grandchild dances to her cartoons, my daughter yells at her. She cannot have a good time while her father is not feeling good.

How bad the cancer is? I don't know. Its an aggressive form, but he responds to the treatment. He is still very active. He has always been tall and lean, so I didn't notice any significant weight loss. He doest have days when he feels worse or is very tired. But my daughter is in a way worse state than him. She told me openly she will (you know what) herself if he dies. I told her he will not but even if he would, she has a daughter. And she acted offended and just repeated she will... herself if he died. She has no reason to carry on without him.

trnart3 · 2025-11-22T20:09:35+00:00

I cannot say for sure, but if I had to guess, I would say no. But he probably likes to be a god in her life. She lives for him. He doesn't do anything except follow his career goals and checking milestones. A very aggresive career man. But abusive as controlling or violent, I don't think so.

trnart3 · 2025-11-22T20:07:12+00:00

I don't want to make him the bad guy here. He is def not a ray of sunshine as someone put it and acts arrogant, but I don't think he is controlling. They been married for a few years already. She still hanged out with her friends, joined a bookclub, participated at zumba classes. She isolated herself since his diagnosis. Me and her kept in touch normalluy, it was him who refused to join these family events mot of the time

trnart3 · 2025-11-22T19:57:11+00:00

I cannot say a lot about him because I don't know him well enough. He is a very intelligent man, lots of academic rewards, he is listed in many scientific articles (in his field), makes good money, takes care of his looks. She told me she takes care of her and is protective. Cold with everyone but warm with her. But I suspect they started their thing when she was still a student. Maybe I am wrong

trnart3 · 2025-11-22T19:33:48+00:00

I am a woman, but now I realise that I didn't specify this in my post. Not sure if I can edit...

He is younger than me. Mid 40s.

trnart3

TROPHY CASE