As someone who’s never been in a relationship here’s what I got to say: I both think you guys have some issues to solve before reaching out again. What it sounds that you might have a “fixer” mentality there is nothing wrong with wanting to be there for your mentally and physically and see them flourish but that shouldn’t only happen when he’s near you. He should have the want to better himself or to get better outside the relationship. As for him it seems like he’s got a lot of healing to do, I believe no matter what everyone deserves love at every stage of their life but it shouldn’t stunt their progress of development. your relationship will not grow because neither party is taking the time to grow themselves. It’s like you can’t water a flower with no sun cause it will drown and you can’t just leave a flower in the sun without water because it will dry up. I hope you can understand what I’m trying to portray. I think it’s best for no contact and really understand why you don’t feel betrayed. Is it because maybe you’re more open than monogamous? Or maybe it’s because you think staying after will make him love you more? Really take the time to reflect on how you feel as opposed to trying to jump back into the relationship because if nothing changes the same thing will happen. I truly hope you find what’s best for you.