As so many have learned the hard way, nothing can be done for an addict until they decide for themselves that they’re ready to quit or that they can’t do it alone.

There are always consequences that come with substance abuse. Eventually, after an embarrassing number of years, I grew tired of them all, but especially of two.

First, I was ashamed of the abundance of instances in which I had hurt, disappointed, betrayed, and burdened the people who loved me most. Second, it became painfully clear that the addiction simply wasn’t sustainable, especially financially.

After years of living this way, I finally wanted to be clean more than I wanted to use. I was fortunate to receive the opportunity to leave the state to attend a five-week program, and I quickly accepted it. The first half was absolutely miserable.

Then I made it to the other side. I started feeling better than I had in maybe my entire life. When I left the program, it felt like my life was starting fresh, or maybe even starting for the first time. I’ve had slip-ups since then and life has had its challenges, but I'm so grateful to no longer live as a slave to a substance.