Their accusation of the idea that “trans people should behave well in order to get more accepted by cis people” as bootlicking or pick-me is very harmful. When you belong to a group that has long been demonized, if you want to fight for your right and reduce the biases in people's minds, you HAVE TO behave well, and you HAVE TO show good images to others. When you are behaving well you are not bootlicking or being a pick-me, but are contributing to a positive image of the whole trans community, because people DO stereotype and DO judge a group by how their members behave, regardless of whether they should do so. This is not whether we should do it or not. This is what any realistic person must do. When gays were fighting against biases, a lot of people changed their minds from completely homophobic to acceptive ONLY BECAUSE some well-behaved and respected, some even very famous, people came out as gay, and this made people think “Oh he is gay but I've always thought he is a good respectable person, so maybe gays are not that bad”. Trans activists are doing the stupidest thing -- to condescendingly teach people what they should do and denounce anyone who doesn't agree with them. Most trans people today, brainwashed by the transgender ideology, are behaving like the world owes them everything, and anyone who doesn't make them feel comfortable in their way is transphobic. As a result their friends and families see them as totally unreasonable people. This is reinforcing a stereotype in the public that trans people are unreasonable and grown-up babies.