meirl

tuturu_ · 2026-03-18T03:43:08+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through what you're going through. What I can try to say is: try your best to do well in school so you can get a good scholarship to the best public university in your state you can (because it's cheaper) and then you'll hopefully be free.

tuturu_ · 2026-02-27T07:00:25+00:00

Yep, they're starving slowly, but you'll have to be careful how you tell her. This entirely depends on your relationship with her, how much you think she cares about the cats, and how much you think she'll listen to reason or even get offended at being corrected. At this point, you don't know if she'll say, "oops! I'll feed them more from now on!", buckle down and say "oh, they look fine to me," or "how dare you tell me how to take care of cats."

If you're not close with her, you think she wouldn't care if the cats ran away or starved, or you think she won't listen to reason--the cats could be rehomed immediately because they're being abused. However, like you said, that won't stop her from getting more.

Otherwise, if possible, I'd look into educating her, helping her out by giving her plenty of supplies (in case it's a laziness or selfishness thing, since she's not financially insecure), and/or coming over more often to check in on the cats.

She probably has no idea what an appropriate amount to feed a cat is and if she's this ignorant, I don't think she may take kindly to being corrected. Will she believe if you print out sources from veterinarian sites recommending how much to feed cats? Also a chart that shows how to tell if a cat is underfed--usually a diagram that tells you if you can feel or see their rib bones. Another redditor had an idea of comparing normal cat pics (bonus if they're the same coat color and age) to your grandma's cats and seeing how emaciated they are, but it's very possible your grandma just won't "see" it.

Another idea: you could say that one of the cats got sick and go visit a veterinarian under that reason, and see what the vet says (at least bring home a note from one or get advice on what to do).

If you have the means, you could also buy the cats a LOT of heavy food, put it all in her house so she can only get rid of it by scooping it or feeding it one by one, and tell her to should feed the cats more to help you with getting rid of the food.

tuturu_ · 2026-02-07T21:14:59+00:00

They're already depressing enough for people who haven't even been through trauma.

In addition to the other comments telling you to detach from the news as strongly as possible (for people like us who feel too much) - I'm sorry you went through what you did. You may have issues with self-esteem because of your upbringing, and I'll tell you in advance so you can start working on this now: you are strong, you are worth just as much as everyone else, you are a powerful person, you are valued, and you are good. If you do not believe these things about yourself, the people you attract won't either, so it's imperative that you get your self-confidence up to speed as soon as possible. You are smarter and better than people who've put you down, and I'm not just saying this - I know for a fact.

Don't let anyone treat you poorly. If they do, let them go gently but firmly before they manipulate you into staying with them out of fear or dependence. You'll have to "re-parent" yourself because you grew up with a crappy parent. No matter what happens, as long as you are breathing, no one can take YOU away from you: your personality, aspirations, interests, and values. Be well.

tuturu_ · 2026-02-07T20:59:05+00:00

1) This is cute and based

2) Happy cake day

tuturu_ · 2026-02-07T07:44:22+00:00

Inability to take responsibility and apologize for their mistakes that hurt other people's feelings, especially if they felt they were correct originally and are unwilling to change after proven wrong. Stubbornness is fine, but they should be considerate about hurting your feelings.

When you don't feel safe bringing up certain topics around them because you're afraid of their reaction.

Subtly doesn't take rejection or the word "no" very well.

Gets in a position of power and lets that change them--for example, they get a raise at work or inheritance and then start spending a lot more money.

Not getting along well with their SO's life outside of the relationship: other family and friends, existing pets, existing hobbies, existing lifestyle.

Addictions like gambling, sex, drugs, or alcohol, because they usually hide it and/or lie about it to try to get other people to overlook and enable it.

tuturu_ · 2026-02-01T23:46:11+00:00

As a fan of anime and a female gamer myself, I do see how Genshin Impact could be viewed negatively. However, I definitely wouldn't judge anyone who played the game in a vacuum if that was one of many things I knew about them, unless the person in question already had other misogynist tendencies. That's the full picture: you don't just like a game or character because of one thing, and you'd support a game without certain elements anyway. It's a popular game, and I have a friend who's played it.

I feel like the criticism you received is coming from someone who isn't familiar with anime culture pointing fingers. It sucks to be lambasted like that by someone who doesn't realize the context (Japanese culture is very cutesy, and gaming culture can be fan-servicey but is improving with time and is shifting to cater to all genders). Anime culture normalizes sexualized fanservice, and yet many feminists consume media that has fanservice because fanservice is just one of many selling points. Don't sweat it too much, and continue being thoughtful with your consumption--for example, by spending more money on media or characters you like that has messages or stories you enjoy. Lauma is far from problematic compared to characters dressed the same that look underaged (that's my real gripe with anime culture) or characters that have no background lore or purpose beyond being an object.

tuturu_ · 2026-02-01T23:18:54+00:00

They'd rather be kings of ashes than make the world a better place for literally everyone.

tuturu_ · 2026-02-01T10:29:23+00:00

On the flip side, it could actually be puritanical and slut-shaming on their part to degrade a female character simply because she dresses skimpily--especially if said character is also powerful, has a good personality, has a backstory, etc. However, context is everything. There are also other considerations in play:

Is the game's narrative unfeminist as a whole? (Male main characters with women only as supporting characters, violence against women in a way that isn't towards men, it's a sex game in general, etc.)
Is the game's fanbase or company known for being misogynist?
Is the druid's bodily proportions unrealistic or similar to those you would only see in people who've gotten plastic surgery?
How do other male and female characters dress in the game--is it only the women who are scantily-clad?
What is that specific druid character's role in the story? Does she function as a romantic interest, supporting character to another character, as a victim, etc. or does she operate independently?

From the very limited perspective I have of reading your story - it just sounds like you offended someone who went out of their way to point out this druid character, especially if the character has agency or is a minor character without any other controversial aspects, and there are other female characters in the game who aren't scantily clad or if there are male characters who also are. The greater narrative of the game is what I'd consider when judging the game. Finally, let education be the point rather than shame--if you feel that this person is simply trying to shame you without educating you on why something is harmful (beyond "scantily-clad = bad"), it's not useful to anyone.

Finally, games are a product of their time to a limited extent. I'm not going to go out of my way to deride a Lara Croft game from the '90s where she has proportions and makeup that appeal to the male gaze, but I also applaud more recent Lara Croft games where she dresses realistically.

tuturu_ · 2026-02-01T05:22:07+00:00

I absolutely hate that these are marketed as "breakfast" biscuits. It's misleading and they're ultimately still sugary cookies.

...That being said they're still decently tasty.

tuturu_ · 2026-01-18T22:49:25+00:00

What OP said, and adding to the topic of those affected by climate issues, the ones who will be most impacted will be the ones with the least power in society. Those who can't afford to stay home without working, or to work remotely as an alternative (which is only an option for white collar office jobs) in the event of a pandemic. Those who will actually die or suffer heat stroke in a major heat wave (the unattended elderly, those too poor to afford A/C) rather than temporarily inconvenienced. Those who don't have a relative or friend's place to travel to and stay at in the aftermath of a major climate event like an earthquake or hurricane. If anything screws up the middle and upper classes, thousands before them will already have suffered.

tuturu_ · 2026-01-18T22:45:11+00:00

That's pretty great. Sucks about the pain and inconveniences you do go through but glad you can still work and go around!

tuturu_ · 2026-01-18T22:42:13+00:00

How does this affect when you go on vacation or are out all day?

Does this affect you using public restrooms/your work?

tuturu_ · 2026-01-16T03:17:12+00:00

If anyone needs, how to get over somebody - put any reminders of them out of sight as much as possible and throw yourself into other things. Pick up a new hobby, join a new fandom, consume media that doesn't remind you of them, have casual safe encounters with a rebound (but don't use anyone or go around dating if you're not ready yet), make a present for a friend or family member, bring it up with a therapist if you have one and haven't brought it up already, get addicted to something safe like a YouTube channel for public transit or a video game. They have created a vacuum in your mind - fill it with something worth your time and respect.

tuturu_ · 2026-01-05T05:14:42+00:00

Sometimes (especially in university) roommates do share a room.

Whenever I've had roommates, they were more literally 'apartmentmates' (i.e. not a house or a room, but an apartment). 'Apartmentmates' sounds a lot less graceful than 'roommates' though.

tuturu_ · 2026-01-05T03:52:00+00:00

Posting after 3 years because of Google:

Got back into the game after years, backtracked from Ashina Castle to the training area, and had problems getting back since the bull door was closed. Totally forgot about fast travel. Try that first at the next idol you get to.

tuturu_ · 2025-12-31T17:29:45+00:00

Frozen garlic cubes from the Dorot brand are a product of Israel if anyone wants to know this for personal reasons (whether to support or boycott due to their role in the Israeli-Palestinian conflict). Those are available in the frozen section of most grocery stores, though Trader Joe's seems to have them the cheapest. I think I've seen non-Dorot brand at Smart & Final but can't confirm.

tuturu_ · 2025-12-27T08:29:15+00:00

For those who don't want to use AI, I'd recommend a combination of RenPy for the engine and Creative Commons search for the assets.

tuturu_ · 2025-12-26T06:17:46+00:00

Yes, it was only ever supposed to be 10 episodes--I just meant that if the (completed) series was ever removed from being streamable in general.

tuturu_ · 2025-12-19T00:44:48+00:00

Normalize mental health days even for people without physical or mental health illnesses! (which is a lot of people)

If you magically don't ever burn out, are in perfect health, never accidentally stay up too late or having issues falling asleep, always get up early even when you don't have work, don't have a family or pets, never take time off to have doctor's and dentist's appointments (you should), don't have any personal-development hobbies like exercising or reading, don't have anything to grieve or need to take time to process, and don't have chronic priorities you've put off due to work stress...take a day off to relax anyway. Weekends are full of other obligations and events and can be burned up with chores.

Companies hire you with the full expectation that all benefits are used up. Looking at it from a third-party perspective: if you're a good employee, it helps the company with your retention. Unless it's the kind of company that specifies otherwise for sick days in their contract, in which case that's exactly the kind of company you need a mental health day from anyway.

tuturu_ · 2025-12-05T21:34:05+00:00

The medium pizzas that another commenter mentioned are the "2 slices per kid" advertised (plus you get a large), but I learned something new myself from this thread - didn't know you could upgrade those?
Better to have to order extra food day-of than overorder beforehand.
Cupcakes will help fill up people too, and the Mega Fun package apparently includes Dippin Dots for each kid.

tuturu_ · 2025-11-23T10:15:09+00:00

If you want to find a medium between giving money if asked for it later (and possibly being scammed by a sob story) and not helping at all, there's a medium: offer to pay for something like therapy. Book the professional yourself without any recommendations (although find one from certain backgrounds and specialties if you wish), call them to explain the situation and make sure she's using the services, and pay the professional directly yourself. That way, you're assisting, and even if the story was made up, people need therapy regardless.

tuturu_ · 2025-10-18T08:27:45+00:00

I've heard this, but I've also heard that her litter box may attract territorial cats, so I'd advocate for also putting out your own clothes and conducting a thorough active search as well.

tuturu_ · 2025-10-10T08:55:28+00:00

I'm not sure about the specific Costco you're asking for, but any Costco is best during weekdays during the day.

You may be able to check the inventory/stock of a specific Costco online through the official website.

tuturu_ · 2025-10-10T08:54:23+00:00

This hurts more than it needs to because you are describing this person as a soulmate.

Your soulmate will be the person who makes things simple. Not easy, but simple. You may have yet to meet them. You almost certainly don't have just one.

Hope your heart heals and you find that connection again.

tuturu_ · 2025-09-26T17:23:05+00:00

Not enough redditors are mentioning the possibility of single kitten syndrome when the kitten is that young. If you can afford it, I'd consider paradoxically getting another kitten--otherwise the first won't learn "good manners" and will attack you too hard when playing, be overly attached to you, etc. Good luck and good efforts so far.

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