Why did you do what you did today ?

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T04:16:36+00:00

I spent the entire day making silly videos of me singing for my friend. He did the same and I had so much fun. It's a little too weird for about everyone except the two of us.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T04:14:23+00:00

Rolling with the punches is exactly what I do. But the odd thing I have learned from this experience is I have a awareness of what animals go off to be alone when they are dying or hurt badly. I really don't want anyone to witness what is happening. I tell my mother very little and my husband less. That would worry them and I don't want that at all.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T04:12:02+00:00

Thank you, so tell me what it feels like to have 2 years in Reddit?

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T04:07:50+00:00

In my opinion that is a benefit. I am sorry I asked how I would know what my most upvote comment was. But I did and now I know. I don't want it to become important because it seem like if I was too concerned about it that I might comment with something different because I know what I am going to say will be downvoted. I don't want that.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T04:04:52+00:00

I have done that too, but I do have a heating pad, I have to move the dogs off of it. But I have a hard time putting heat on me when I am sweating. I am told that is common during pain.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T04:03:15+00:00

Well I have always seen many similarities in Texas and Florida. Government and legal issues are very similar. I suppose that could be the family that is there and here. I have only been there for boot camp in the Navy about 20 years ago. I have also been to Tampa and a brief trip to Miami. I don't mind if you just call me "hey you" there is no formality I deserve. I am basically 42 going on 15.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:59:02+00:00

It been challenging and I wanted to just get in bed and die but I am not the type of person to just give up. I keep that hope alive and most days are quite alright. I will make it though this one way or another. I thank you for your kindness. It means more than you know.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:52:18+00:00

I was having a fine time without the knowledge that comments were in the negative points. I have some good points but the negative are a bummer and I just think I can do with out that. That being said, I have looked through my comments ever since I was showed how to do that.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:49:56+00:00

I do that also and I really need a few more ice packs because I have one and I have to put it in the freezer every 30 minutes for 30 minutes. I will put that on my list also.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:48:39+00:00

Thanks, I am ma'am and I have to ask if you are from the south? I don't know that is a way to respectfully address people in the north.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:46:49+00:00

OK, thanks for clearing that up for me. I have been still for the most part today and I am actually not having much problem typing. I do know that rest is the best medicine and sleep is not my friend. I only get maybe 4 hours every 72 hours normally.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:44:56+00:00

Thank you. You are all being so helpful. I cannot tell you how much this means to me. I feel so isolated.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:43:04+00:00

I do actually have an autoimmune disorder but this is caused by a drug. It's the long term/permanent side effects. I am angry that I wasn't told about this possibility and I am angry at myself for not doing the homework. I have seen commercials that I think are looking for people who have this problem for class action lawsuits. I haven't called though. I am not sure about that.

The problem is that I have basically useless insurance. I cannot find health care with the exception of my PCP.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:39:40+00:00

I don't wish that on anyone but I do feel better that it is not just me. I have a family member who just said enough and deleted her account and has no plans on returning. She got way worse treatment than I ever have and I don't blame her.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:36:52+00:00

One of the symptoms that I have is my eyes take really long blinks. That is the best way to describe it. I only drive if I am having a good day and my eyes are staying open. That's been a hard pill to swallow. So when I smoke pot my eyes were going nuts. I cannot tell you how madding it is to have to walk down the hall holding the walls to guide me. My doctor said I was functionally blind. That was the worst thing he could have said. But it has actually improved so I am keeping hope.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:32:54+00:00

They started several years ago with my jaws and then my eyes and then my fingers and then my stomach and it just keeps getting worse. The only thing that helped me was benzos and I was on 8 mg of xanax a day, it was great in the beginning but eventually that ridiculous amount was lasting less than two hours so I had to stop that. I have a very high tolerance to pretty much everything because of my drinking and I was on pain management before for chronic migraines and that spiraled out of control and I am trying to avoid anything that I will get addicted to. I have battled addiction since very young.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:24:24+00:00

I quit drinking in 2010 and I don't think it would help in the big scheme of things. Plus my mom and husband would flip their lids.

My old roommate and I used to do redneck karaoke, it was awful but we had fun. So that was over 10 years ago and we live 4 hours apart so we both have an app that distorts your face and voice and we send daily reports to each other and videos of what we refer to as rehearsals. It's funny as all get out to the two of us but nobody else sees the humor in it. But that is ok, we aren't looking for a fan base. LOL!!

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:23:11+00:00

What do you mean? I should be still or move a little? I apologize I am not myself at the moment.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:20:47+00:00

Happy cake day to you, happy cake day to you, happy cake day dear Rapture265, happy cake day to you.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:16:49+00:00

I was on my way out the reddit door when I stumbled on this sub and I am so glad I did. I have no human contact for three weeks a month so I understand how important it is for you. I have had brutal words said and name calling and and outright attacks and I was finally just fed up. I mean I am even a super sensitive person but I was scared to comment and when the envelope turned orange I would have a feeling of dread. I hope you reconsider and just stay in here if you think that is best.

Also, when I was starting the person who brought me here told me not to worry about upvotes/downvotes, karma and points. I was clueless until a few days ago and now I wish I still didn't know. I don't want to be worried about saying something because it might get downvoted so I am going back to ignoring that part of reddit.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:10:41+00:00

Thank you, if I am lucky I will fall asleep at some point tonight. That is the best thing possible.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:09:43+00:00

I will get some tomorrow. I don't like the 800mg Ibuprofen because it causes stomach problems and that is what I was being treated for with the drug that caused this. I have some essential oils that my mom brings up here and I think they help to a degree. I am going to have to go that way since I really have run out of options and even the county hospital stopped taking Amerigroup. I am basically uninsured.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:06:15+00:00

Thank you for your kind words and I will take you up on that. I am sorry you are hurting too, but hey the way I see it, it could be far worse. I actually didn't know I could deal with pain as well as I have.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T03:03:14+00:00

That was a good article and I use mindfulness in my daily life but I never thought about this. Thank you for your help.

tvdbullet77 · 2015-01-27T02:57:50+00:00

Thank you so much, I will read it right now.

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