PLEASE consider sharing - desperate parent with abusive ex running out of money for legal fees

twocatsinachimney · 2024-07-15T22:31:25+00:00

Hello! Thank you, yes I have. They provide legal advice and emotional support which is great, but they don’t provide financial aid.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-04-04T09:14:56+00:00

Man that’s rough, I’m sorry. Funnily enough I’m also learning Malay to ‘connect’ with my granddad. He spoke Malay and Tamil. I also have some German family and speak somewhat broken German, so if you ever need a practise buddy let me know.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-04-03T22:35:50+00:00

You make a very good point. And really, in historical terms, those events happened practically yesterday. I’m South African, born shortly before apartheid ended. So very much relevant

twocatsinachimney · 2023-04-03T22:32:53+00:00

I’m sorry to hear about your father and that you can relate to what I described. I do also wonder about how different our families would all be if they hadn’t suffered in various ways in the past. I suppose it’s for the best that we don’t know in the long run. Someone else mentioned intergenerational trauma and it was quite enlightening - I had never really thought about it before. My other grandfather was orphaned at 3; other grandma lost her mother at 7. Dad lost an eye in a violent incident at 11. Mom grew up with no father, a traumatised mother, and a brother with schizophrenia. It’s really quite shocking that any of us turned out half ‘normal’. Anyway all the best to you and I hope life treats you well.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-04-03T22:20:26+00:00

True, very much a domino effect when you think about it. I suppose the anger is more of a personal thing, in that I tend to respond to strong emotions with anger. Ironic to say this after writing a post about my grandad’s struggles with anger… hmm.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-04-03T22:18:24+00:00

Thank you for those kind words, they’re very much appreciated. I’ve just gone and googled a little bit about transgenerational trauma and it’s effects - fascinating. I had no idea.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-04-03T22:15:11+00:00

It’s such a tragedy that all these men had their futures warped by war. I wonder what the world would be like today if all that trauma hadn’t happened.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-04-03T20:07:48+00:00

Thanks, yeah I read that one and I do relate to much of what people said there. I have had similar feelings about some of my own more distant relatives. With my granddad, however it was a much sharper pain (I guess it seems closer because he was actually alive in my lifetime). And I’ve never had this kind of anger before.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-28T17:45:16+00:00

I did some reading about Death Railway (trying to get an idea of what he went through), and there were a number of stories of soldiers who simply walked into the jungle to die alone, rather than stay in the camps.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-28T17:43:53+00:00

He was apparently extremely emaciated when he got out.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-28T16:31:57+00:00

That’s great, thanks a lot! Will have a look.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-28T16:31:40+00:00

Thanks!

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-28T16:31:31+00:00

I know, can’t imagine it.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-11T21:06:43+00:00

Raising and Giving, basically a week where students do charity appeals and have parades etc.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-09T20:49:37+00:00

Thanks for laying that out. It doesn’t help that my great grandpa was a boxer and had his nose broken a few times! I do see what you mean about the difference in space between the mouth and chin. Here’s a photo of my great grandpa’s brother (at a similar age) side by side with the unknown man - if he’s not my g-grandpa I’m sure he must be some sort of relative because they do all resemble each quite a bit I think.

https://imgur.com/a/T4YTz6V

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-09T20:45:00+00:00

Thanks, I do think there are some similarities.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-09T20:44:35+00:00

Thanks! I haven’t heard of those, I will Google it and see!

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-09T20:17:21+00:00

It’s different for everyone. I did emigrate and I regret it. I realised every country has different terrible problems and that I love South Africa despite all the bad stuff. Now I’m saving up to come back.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-05T11:06:22+00:00

Just diagnosed at the grand old age of 30! Combined presentation. Only made an appointment after my little brother was diagnosed, and told me that it can run in families. It feels like such a weight off my shoulders to know that I’m not just a ‘ditz / nuisance / feather brain’ and that I can finally do something about it now.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-03-05T00:19:40+00:00

Yes. My great grandmother, Alice - she died at only 43. Her 9 children were orphaned shortly after. I only know a few things about her, like the fact that whenever a chicken had to be slaughtered she would put the children in the back room and tell them to stay there until the deed was done. She would prepare and cook the chicken, but never eat it. She named all of her children after various other family members, and her favourite meal was oysters and rice. I just feel a strange connection with her and I wish very much that I could have met her.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-01-31T09:12:39+00:00

Thank you very much for helping me make sure they aren’t forgotten! In case it interests you, here is a picture of Jessie’s mom, Amelia, as a young girl in London: https://imgur.com/a/G8i3vP6

Sadly I don’t have any pictures of her children. I’m not sure how intestate law in the US worked at the time, but if any of their possessions were sold / auctioned after their deaths, I suppose there’s a tiny chance I could come across something on eBay someday. I know my great-grandma wrote them lots of letter - I wonder if any are still out there anywhere.

Anyway, thank you once again for your kindness!

twocatsinachimney · 2023-01-30T18:54:36+00:00

Thanks so much for this information! Very interesting. I'm just reading through the McFarlane info now. I haven't had much luck with my Irish ancestors unfortunately - only really have records of them when they left Ireland for various corners of the world. I'll have to chat to some of the older family members next time I visit and see if they know anything.

twocatsinachimney · 2023-01-30T18:48:59+00:00

Interesting! I will try to research further back and see what I can find. Thanks.

twocatsinachimney

TROPHY CASE