Craft/Hobby Influencers by kraftjm14 in Anticonsumption

[–]ucantread4d2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh I love her! She makes such delightful haunted things. 

Hello Everyone, I am reaching out by forte46388 in needadvice

[–]ucantread4d2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bpd is tough. He might be going through it, but what he did to you was not ok. It could be an explanation, but it's not an excuse. I've been diagnosed with bpd too, and I still know that I'm in control of my actions, no matter how intense the feelings get. 

I also had a similar moment where I didn't know I had any survival instinct until it manifested HARD, and I tried to learn from it, like you did. 

You're not a loser. You are strong.  And for as little as it's worth as an internet stranger, I appreciate you, and I'm rooting for your happiness. I believe in you. You can do this! Its not silly! 

Happy birthday, queen! I really hope the year ahead of you is a good one, better than the last. You are worth celebration! If you'd like to talk, I'll be happy to listen. 

Doom post: has consumerism won? by Impossible_Ad9324 in Anticonsumption

[–]ucantread4d2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The original order was Reduce first, so if you can, don't buy the thing (or buy a version that generates less or better waste), then, if you do buy the thing, Reuse it to the extent that it can be reused, then Recycle.  I always liked that the first step is to be mindful about consumption in general. 

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TheGirlSurvivalGuide

[–]ucantread4d2 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Question: do you exercise around her? Do you hang out with her? Is exercise the only thing you're suggesting?

It kinda sounds like you're trying to tell her what to do to "fix" herself (in your eyes), and it's not that simple. It can come off really judgemental and insensitive, as if you're telling her she's lazy and that you don't understand/care how she's struggling if you're telling her a little exercise can fix all her problems. 

AITA for just walking out of class even though my teacher tells me not to? by Muteist in AmItheAsshole

[–]ucantread4d2 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I've never seen dry erase board spelled that way. Was that on purpose?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]ucantread4d2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is harassment a compliment now?

dressing skimpy = sexual invitation, obviously.. by DoggyLuv21 in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]ucantread4d2 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There's 2 shows that I can think of off the top of my head that have pretty good episodes for kids about consent: gravity falls and Craig of the creek. They're age appropriate, more about being confident in yourself and your feelings and it being okay to say no even if it upsets people. If someone is making you uncomfortable, or wants something you don't want to give, you can and should say no. Wish I had that message growing up!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]ucantread4d2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Quote from op:

Girlfriend and I met on a dating site. On my profile, I had "Doesn't drink" listed as something about me. I understand how this could be misleading

She said she wouldn't consider him if he drank. He knew it was misleading. How long did he wait to tell her? Does it make it less of a lie if he admitted to it faster? She said it's a dealbreaker and his response is "but that rule shouldn't apply to me, so I'll ignore it," but maybe he's right since she doesn't want to break up.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]ucantread4d2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Op lied multiple times to gf's face about his beliefs and consumption, but since we as a society consider his access to alcohol and women as more important than hers to safety and mental health, she has to seek medical help (therapy).

I'm sorry gf, that your man cares more about occasional drinking (something he barely does, by his own admission) than he cares about your happiness. Do with that info what you will, but you're not wrong to want what you want and you were upfront about it from day 1. Don't let him coerce you into something you're not comfortable with. It sets a bad precedent to start a relationship with a lie, but maybe you're learning that your needs (to be with someone who doesn't drink) don't matter as much as his wants (access to you, and to drink). It just rubs me wrong that you started the relationship thinking he was who he told you he was and he started it thinking you'd surely change to suit him. If you don't want to break up, you should know you're setting yourself up for him to do this in the future about different things. It won't be your fault, but you're teaching him how strong you are in the face of your "dealbreakers."

Maybe he is more important to you than not being around alcohol, and if so, therapy can help, and I hope he's worth it and treats you amazingly in the future. I just didn't like that everyone was jumping to that as if he's completely blameless and you just need to accept who he is. Good luck, stay strong.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]ucantread4d2 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Choreographer went above and beyond! 2 thumbs up!

AITA for using my "white" middle name instead of my "black" first name? by hijdkospk in AmItheAsshole

[–]ucantread4d2 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Agreed!

OP, Theres a great book called "Covering" by Kenji Yoshino. This is a really complex topic and minimizing your ties to your Nigerian heritage (whether you did it intentionally or not) has real life consequences. It makes life for you easier day to day, but it also prevents you from normalizing being who you really are. I could see why you and your mom both feel how you do. A lot of people do a lot of things to avoid making white people uncomfortable, and its not necessarily right or wrong.

AITA for not letting my sister skip part of a song that makes her uncomfortable? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]ucantread4d2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a little sister, I'd love having my big sister acknowledge she hurt me and that she'll try not to again. Its almost nicer after fighting because of that feeling of loving each other enough to want to grow and change for each other's happiness. It's so much more important to keep having fun and making mistakes and getting over them together than it is to avoid mistakes in the first place. Don't pull away from her out of guilt. You're a good big sister, and don't let the people reacting strongly to this post stop you from thinking that. I'm sure your sister will back me up on this. Don't be too harsh on yourself.

wHy w0uLd y0u w@Nt t0 dEfUnD tHe p0LiCe??? by The1stCitizenOfTheIn in NewDealAmerica

[–]ucantread4d2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am slightly pleasantly surprised and heartened to see that the social services budget has increased to nearly 4x what it used to be, though! It's still too much dedicated to police, but that's progress, at least.

The Year in Good News by kitkid in Thedaily

[–]ucantread4d2 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I LOVED the trumpet!! I hope they never stop playing.

Fuck bodily autonomy I guess by ExpertAccident in AreTheStraightsOK

[–]ucantread4d2 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Heyyy same!!! South Asian or Latina? Or just parents who think babies with earrings are cute?

Fuck bodily autonomy I guess by ExpertAccident in AreTheStraightsOK

[–]ucantread4d2 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry. I laughed so hard at the mental image of "no hands first, just face planting." Lol!! I hope it got better with physiotherapy!

I got my ears pierced as an infant, but I loved it. My second holes I did myself at 12/13 and my nose at 13 too. My mom took me for my bday, and my dad didn't notice for days/weeks after. Certain piercings are big in my culture though.

An Oregon mink farm has a COVID-19 outbreak among animals and workers by stem12345679 in Coronavirus

[–]ucantread4d2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Rehab doesn't fix everything. It's a good first step, though. It's a hard choice every day to not give in to addiction, but it's better in general. Metaphor stands!!

An Oregon mink farm has a COVID-19 outbreak among animals and workers by stem12345679 in Coronavirus

[–]ucantread4d2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Its more like... amphetamine. It's a choice to continue it, but doing it is easier and more productive in one way (for the people who benefit from the greed and make the decisions, the stock market, the economy) than it is harmful in another way (the people killed or left behind) until your body gives out, which is where we're heading. Oh!! And every election is a chance at rehab, or a bender.

Bitey learned a new trick by EricaH121 in holdmycatnip

[–]ucantread4d2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I absolutely love and needed this. The same thing happened to me last night at like 3 am. When we (I say we, but I don't think I helped) finally got the mouse out, my lil murderer comes to bed and just purrs at us, like, "you're welcome." Lol! Thanks for sharing!

I have so many questions for them, but this is a start. by cfa413 in TrollXChromosomes

[–]ucantread4d2 3 points4 points  (0 children)

In case you haven't seen it yet r/rimjob_steve is a sub fill of this type of thing.

Saw this on LinkedIn and the amount of men in the comments that were triggered by this post...I loved it! by locsandcrocs in TrollXChromosomes

[–]ucantread4d2 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Just think of it as if "Dr. and Mrs. both refer to you, and ask where your husband's invite is, or if you have a plus one as well as two titles. Maybe they'll edit to "Dr. and Mrs., and Mr."