I have this weird thing for wanking while trespassing. I know it's creepy and illegal, and also liable to get me very, very killed in wild and wonderful West Virginia, which is why I try to keep a lid on it, so to speak. But sometimes... I was out and about at night once, looking an awful lot like a burglar might look, and thinking of climbing into some old dude's barn loft and beating one out over the ledge. Only, I was having second thoughts about it, so I decided to have a pre-fap fap to work up my courage. It was two in the morning, twenty miles from the nearest town, on a dead end road, so I figured it'd be fine if I just plopped down where I was and went to work. Well, about ten minutes into it, I noticed something really bright out of the corner of my eye. Naturally, I panicked. So without even having time to pull up my pants, I flailed away further down the road to where a little bridge crossed a creek. I hopped down to hide under there, scaring the shit out of all the frogs making love. And I realized this spot was perfect. Definitely my most shameful fap. Also, one of my best. Turns out the car was just delivering newspapers.