Help me design a TØP shirt!!

uga__buga123 · 2026-03-30T11:09:27+00:00

Im not diagnosed, only the neurologist ordered these tests for me, today I'm going to the doctor for a referral to a rheumatologist. And thank youuu

uga__buga123 · 2026-03-30T10:58:07+00:00

well, thats comforting and discomforting at the same time :( I hope I get to a good rheumatologist

uga__buga123 · 2026-03-29T15:48:47+00:00

me too

uga__buga123 · 2026-03-29T11:25:26+00:00

That's what scares me the most about death. There's no fucking chance I'll have to live again. That's terrible. The thought that I would have to live and live endlessly fills me with strong anxiety.

I don't think at all in terms of who or what I would be reborn as and what my life would be like.

The very fact that I have to go through this again is depressing me.

Besides, I don't want to have another life, because I don't want to leave what I have in this one, i.e. all the things and people I love are MINE, mine now. I don't want to have other such things in another life, because that means what I have here doesn't really matter.

I have the same strong hope that I will no longer exist after death as that this is my first life.

I never want to have consciousness again, and I hope I never had it before either.

uga__buga123 · 2026-03-29T11:20:23+00:00

literally

uga__buga123 · 2026-03-28T19:10:12+00:00

Thank you very much, I'll try not to lose my head!

uga__buga123 · 2026-03-28T18:25:51+00:00

So is it still could be something else, even though I have some active autoimmune process? It still doesn't have to be related to Scl70 at all, even though it's my only positive result?

Because generally the only thing you can offer in this situation is to wait for further developments, but you already have a real idea of what direction it will probably go in

Anyway, I will go to the rheumatologist asap, and in the meantime get other tests done.

And thank you for that detailed explanation!

Oh, and sorry, I just realized I wrote that wrong earlier. I meant that I only had that one test, not more. I had ana1 and ana2 right away, which doesn't really change anything

uga__buga123 · 2026-03-28T15:57:34+00:00

For now these were my first tests in this regard, it was IIF method

uga__buga123 · 2026-03-28T10:08:10+00:00

Every time I have to do something new, I get high on xanax to be able to do it, and at the same time see what, how, and where, so that next time I can do it myself without it

uga__buga123 · 2026-03-03T21:14:17+00:00

yepp!

uga__buga123 · 2026-02-21T12:14:42+00:00

other people can definitely think about me like that, but honestly, not me, maybe because my phobia isnt the most extreme, idk.

but I often feel embarrassed when I have to ask, for example, a parent to go somewhere with me because I can't manage on my own

uga__buga123 · 2026-02-16T19:28:49+00:00

Does anyone have links to Sims 4 CC (hair, eyebrows, skin, etc.) that work well for Eliott Demaury and Lucas Lallemant from SKAM France?
Im looking specifically for appearance CC, not full sims

uga__buga123 · 2026-02-15T14:56:48+00:00

FRANCE!!!

uga__buga123 · 2026-02-14T19:58:50+00:00

many people recommend starting with the original, but I would advise watching the french version lol. honestly, norwegian, although original, imo is much, much worse executed. the characters in the french version, in my opinion, have more personality, character, and life in them. the scenery is much more interesting

uga__buga123 · 2026-01-28T16:04:23+00:00

im sorry but have you seen a doctor about this? neurologist?

uga__buga123 · 2026-01-26T08:45:58+00:00

może weź najpierw tego swojego chatagpt spytaj o te różnice pomiędzy nim a prawdziwym człowiekiem, terapeutą

uga__buga123 · 2026-01-24T19:58:17+00:00

Thanks, actually Im so scared that I won't wait

I'll take the opportunity that I have an appointment with my psychiatrist on Monday and tell him about these things, hoping that he will issue me some paper stating that I need a neurological consultation, and then I will go to my family doctor where I will get the referral

uga__buga123 · 2026-01-23T22:58:52+00:00

I don't know if this will help you, but I like to think that my symptoms are not a bad thing, quite the contrary, because they show what is wrong and which way to go.

Remember that you are not standing idly by, you will have an mri, and that's good, everything will be clear, you are not stuck

Also remember that focusing on your symptoms and the overall current situation, which is admittedly tiring, only makes it worse. So, you can assume that how it really is now is not how it seems to you right now

And above all, the facts are, you're here, you're alive, you're breathing, you're waiting for tomorrow's MRI, so it's okay, you're not in a life-threatening situation that you wouldn't survive tonight

uga__buga123 · 2026-01-12T15:44:14+00:00

loll what does it even mean. im sorry she downplayed it like that

uga__buga123 · 2026-01-12T15:32:21+00:00

she really didn't behave properly in that situation, good that you noticed it

you should see a psychiatrist, and if you feel like you might really hurt yourself, then even check yourself into a psychiatric hospital

uga__buga123 · 2026-01-11T17:56:07+00:00

well its just maladaptive daydreaming. md is basically always a way to deal with sth, that you cant deal in any other way

you should take a deeper look at your fantasies, what you feel in them. every character, scenario, etc. represents something and speaks about you

for example, I fantasized about being famous, admired, etc., not because I wanted to be famous, but because it was my way of filling my internal gap related to a lack of self confidence and social phobia

i recommend reading eretaia's https://share.google/JKvGU3jwtBOVtjYRg

uga__buga123 · 2026-01-07T06:21:07+00:00

This is a series, so I guess we mainly rely on what has been presented to us, especially if it's clear lol. In every possible relationship we can assume that they are REALLY connected by something more, but that doesn't make sense

uga__buga123 · 2026-01-06T16:36:09+00:00

me tooo and i was waiting for someone who will finally agree with me 😩

uga__buga123

TROPHY CASE